u/Hairy_Jaguar_8030 — reddlx

hello!!!! i've been having trouble figuring out what haircut to get.. i love love love having a shag but it is a pain to style, especially when i barely have time before my lectures. however, i'd still like to have layers, volume, that "messy" bed-hair look, and bangs - maybe something that also fits my face shape.

my AMAZING stylist who cut my hair about 3 months ago got me SO RIGHT with a cut that made me feel so confident :') i was crying tears of joy... until the next time i washed my hair i was so confused as to how i am supposed to style it.

so...what haircut should i get, considering i still want the things listed above but not something super difficult to style? and what products should i buy for styling? being a college student i dont have a lot of money. my stylist suggested Kevin Murphy's Bedroom Hair spray but i'm not sure how long it lasts, and i dont have a lot of money to be buying that spray every month or so.

thank you in advance for any advice!!

first picture is me 3 months ago right after my haircut appointment and second picture is from about 2 weeks ago (im so sorry i couldnt find a more serious picture of myself 😭)

My boyfriend (19m) and I (19f) have been together for 1 year and 6 months. I love him very much and have enjoyed spending my time with him. Whenever we have problems we talk it out, etc etc, and usually the problems aren't too severe.

However, about a week ago he told me that he has been bottling his emotions and has refrained from talking about several problems for months. Initially, this hurt my feelings because I always try to make him feel comfortable with talking to me about anything. I know how it feels because I've been through it before, so I wouldn't want him feeling like this.

Today he finally told me some of the problems he had been bottling up. Most problems circle back to my issue of him watching p*rn, suggestive content of alternative girls, etc. ((backstory to this: I myself am alternative and this situation just made me feel disgusted with him, however he promised to work on it so I did not break it off. From what I see he has changed for the better, I do not see those things on his fyp anymore, etc))

The very first problem was that he feels he has been losing friends (he didn't say this out loud but I assume it is my fault that he is "losing" friends). I reassured him and apologized, then said something along the lines of "I'm completely fine with you hanging out with your friends and whatnot, as long as there aren't any girls involved or as long as we haven't already made plans." Not too sure if this was the right response...I try not to make these problems about myself but I know how his friends' girlfriends act around him and it weirds me out. I also tried to explain that the reason I enjoy hanging out with him so much is because he is my *boyfriend*. I also feel that it is important to state that I do not have any friends. It's been very hard for me to make friends in college...most of the girls here are very rude or just don't like me because of my appearance but I won't get into that lmao.

All in all, I'm not too sure how to feel about this because he does in fact spend time with his friends every week...usually two or three hours at a time playing ping-pong or whatever. Whereas because I have no friends I end up alone in my dorm studying or doing homework. I'm not sure if he's trying to hint that he wants to spend time with them every day or not lol.

The second problem was about how he thinks I make up excuses instead of just apologizing. I try not to do this, but my reasoning for it is that in my opinion it is better to apologize and THEN explain my reasoning for whatever problem occurred. For instance, once I brought up (jokingly) that he does not listen to me (this was when he was tickling me after I told him not to). He got upset and said that it only becomes a problem when HE doesn't listen, but not when I do it. I apologized and said something about how sometimes I am just in my own mind, staring off daydreaming, or listening to his/my family speak. He got upset and said that I am just making up excuses. However, from my view I thought I was explaining the REASONING for why I might not have been listening to him...and I still apologized. For the specific situation he brought up of me not listening to him was during a road trip with his dad and grandpa. His grandpa was talking about the town we were in and I didn't hear my bf talking about the fiberglass black squirrels that we passed by in the car. Again...I told him that I was listening to his grandpa because he PAID for this trip, he DROVE us all the way to kansas, etc and I feel it is important for me to listen and engage in his conversations because I don't want it to make it seem like I am "using" him (I don't know how to word this better).

The rest of the problems were pretty much about how I am constantly bringing up his past issues with p*rn and whatnot. I told him that I'm not apologizing for that and I will never forgive or forget about that shit. I can for sure try to refrain from talking about it so much...but I am never going to forget about it. I guess this also made him upset because he ended up skipping over a lot of the problems that he had written down in his phone?

I don't know how to go about this. I thought that he wasn't hiding anything from me...but how can I do better for the future? I usually ask him (almost every day) if he's doing okay and if he needs to talk about anything.

Be honest and harsh if you need to 🙏 I want to be better for him.