u/HamNtkyOnWhite

I am wanting a career change. I have done blue collar my entire life cause it was just simple to get into but my body is starting to say no more. I have absolutely 0 background in IT outside of basic computer use and gaming, however with that being said I LOVE tech and have always loved tinkering with electronics. I also used to do home automation, fire alarm installation, access control, patch panel setup etc... for about 2 years hoping it would help me get my foot in the door but no go on that front.

I am now 40 years old and am looking into going to school for my AAS in Computer Information Systems but don't know if its worth it to spend the money on college or just go for my A+, Net+ and Security+ certs instead. I've heard stories of people who have their bachelors in things like CS or Cybersecurity but have been passed up for someone who just got their A+ or Sec+.

So I guess my question is, with it being such a difficult industry to get into especially with no real background, is college worth it for someone like me given the expenses or would I be better off just getting my certs, then just trying to land a help desk role for experience and then work my way up from there? Or is it a bit too late to try and transition into that industry?

So I'll be 40 this year and my wife just said to me and I must say, I'm inclined to agree...

"I say this in a very loving way, but you are very much so a double-edged sword. You want friends, and you want them to like you but you also won't give them anything because you don't want to open up to people and you don't want to let people in so it's very hard to make friends when deep down you really don't want to"

I have noticed that I am just very closed off to people anymore. I'm pretty sure it stems from an accumulation of things like, being cheated on in many relationships over the years, friends of 20+ years just dropping me out of nowhere with zero communication whatsoever. People that I have confided in with personal stuff opening their mouths to others about it, Etc..

People that I have been very close to in my life, people I should have been able to trust just burning me left and right. So now I find that I am very closed off and have become very judgmental because I feel like everyone is out for their own personal gain and when they got what they want from you then they kick you to the curb and move on, so I don't let people get too close or attached.

For example, I am a gamer. All my friends are gamers as well that's actually how we met. We've been friends for the better part of 10 years now and the whole time they've been trying to get me to move to where they all live (I lived in a different state than them) so the opportunity arose and my wife and I were able to make that happen. Now that we're here however, it feels like more of an acquaintance kind of relationship than an actual friendship. We don't see each other ever and we rarely talk these days, hell we almost never even game together anymore. They all still hang out and talking with each other however but it seems as though I have been cast aside again. I should also point out that I'm about 10 years older than all of them too.

They had asked why we never threw a housewarming party, so we ended up doing that and had a big BBQ and so on. Everyone was invited and came over but then they all just sat in my living room with each other the entire time and my wife and I were the only ones out at the grill cooking and having some drinks. Another (and more important) instance was out wedding. They were all invited to it obviously and were my groomsmen, we held it back in mine and my wife's home state because of family and they all once again just hung out with each other rather than try to help me out or be involved and seemed to be more excited due to the fact that they were all on vacation together rather the fact that I was getting married.

Maybe I'm just being sensitive, maybe not, but either way my wife's statement just got me really thinking that she's right, I have really closed myself off over the years and just don't like people very much anymore. I would rather be the boring couple that just hangs out at home and does things together. My wife is my absolute best friend and she and my dog are really the only things I care about deeply about aside from my family of course, but that being said I don't even really speak to them much either.

Maybe I need to go speak to a counselor or something, but how do I do that when I have such a difficult time opening up to people?

Anyways, if you made it this far, thanks for listening, sorry for the novel post!