u/Handnoose

I've only had one session with my new therapist so far, and in it she expressed that as long as there's no active plans to harm myself or others she won't share it. I shared I've had homicidal ideation since a child but stopped sharing it to professionals after two involuntary inpatients as a teenager. She kept her word since I have no plans to act on it, but I'm unsure if it applies to commited crimes like animal cruelty/breaking and entering etc. Certain situations led to it's own issues and I'm aiming to have an unjudgemental outlet, but find it impossible to explain the situation without sharing the "why." Do they report animal abuse/crime?

Given both what I've heard from others with BPD as well as actual studies on how it affects empathy, it's said that it typically causes high emotional empathy and low to average cognitive empathy. I'm confused, because I feel like I have the reverse. In any situation, I can put myself in the other person's shoes and understand why they're upset/why the situation they're in is upsetting, but emotionally it means nothing to me.

An extreme example just to make it more clear what I mean is like watching someone get badly injured in a car wreck, and obviously know logically why it's a horrible situation and why they feel the way they do afterward, but be indifferent emotionally that it happened. A more realistic day-to-day example would be someone venting to me about a situation, fully understanding why it's so upsetting to them, but being indifferent emotionally that it happened and that they're upset. Even situations I've firsthand been through, I feel indifferent emotionally when it's them instead. I do listen, comfort, and give advice, but it's mostly because I like being told I'm a good listener and it's great advice.

Do any of you relate? I'm 99.9% sure my BPD diagnosis is right, but I haven't met/seen someone else who relates yet.

Edit: I looked up what NPD actually is past what media says. In terms of core symptoms, all that fit was taking advantage of others and lack of empathy, but I absolutely see why "I like being told it's great advice" seems narcissistic. I see it more as though if you were focused on painting something, and I were to say "Wow, that's really great." I'd never be offended if they didn't/I don't inherently expect it of them, but I do take it as a compliment. Regardless I'll bring it up to my psych team