u/HappyHummingbird7

My ex and I have been broken up for over a year now. It took time and healing, but we really are friends now. Healthy distance (we also live in different states now), no flirting, appropriate boundaries, etc. We say we miss each other sometimes, but not often. She said this yesterday and I want to ask what she misses - “what do you miss?” Or “what do you miss about me?” I’m wondering if that’s too much? I want to know because recently she’s been texting less (she’s busy with work & I understand)…but she knows I’m a call/text away. When I say I miss her, I miss being able to talk to her whenever about whatever, I miss our catch up calls, I miss having her around. I’m just really curious about what she misses about me, but I’m not sure if that’ll come off flirty or something. I could be overthinking it but I just wanted to come on here for advice on how to proceed. I’m so grateful to still have her in my life and the last thing I want is to make things weird between us. I also neeeed to know lol. Thank you all, in advance. :)

My friend told me that the best way to not text you is to constantly remind myself of the reason why I stopped talking to you to begin with. She also said her friends helped her get through it which unfortunately, I barely have. I know I made the right decision. I know I need to let you go and heal on my own. I know that continuing contact would delay the healing process. But I still really miss you and want to talk to you. I got so used to having you in my life. The distractions don’t distract me enough. I can’t believe I lost sleep last night. I pride myself in being able to fall asleep no matter the circumstance. I didn’t think I was this attached. I thought I’d be able to handle it because this was the logical thing to do. Sometimes I wish you’d done me dirty in some way, so that this process could be much easier. Ending on amicable terms feels harder. I just want to text you. I keep wanting to text you. I’m proud of myself for every minute that goes by that I don’t text you because every minute I want so badly to text you. To know how your day is going, why you’ve eaten, what you did at the gym today. Would it really be so bad to continue contact? Would it make this easier? We were never technically in a relationship. But no, we were. Not having labels doesn’t make the connection any less stronger. I hate this so much.

How to respond

My Reason Isn’t Good Enough