u/Harrold_Potterson

Hi all, I have a 3 year old who I recently got assessed for OT. My main concern was emotion regulation and some maladaptive sensory seeking behavior (mouthing no food items), seeking OT because I noticed some small issues that OT could probably support to globally get at better emotion regulation/tolerance of change

-difficulties with body awareness (goes to the bathroom too frequently for being potty trained for over a year)
-boundary issues with bodies (will poke/prod dad’s ears, my breasts, even after being told to stop several times)
-a lot of sensory seeking behavior (crashing, spinning)
-noticed some mild core weakness (still struggling to work a balance bike despite having one for a year -does not like trying it)

Anyway, I had our OT goal setting meeting today, and the OT was saying that she could have lots of advanced goals like improving pencil grip (it is normal for her age per her assessment), improving scissor hold (again, normal for her age), along with other goals to work on her core strength, body awareness, internal awareness. The OT also said that she typically recommends services for at least a year.

Am I way off in my bs sensor going off? My daughter is on track with all developmental milestones, is socially adept -has friends at school and neighborhood, and is academically advanced (already sounding out simple words). My main concern was just trying to give her a little help with some of these sensory issues so she can cope a little better, as she can get really dysregulated after school. If they want to work on holding scissors a bit that’s fine but I certainly would not have sought a referral for something like that and I don’t really understand why they would make goals for things that she is performing at a normal rate for her age.

I know 3 is not real homeschooling, and I wouldn’t really call it that, just thought this would be a good place to get some ideas.

My daughter is 3 1/2 and is starting to decode simple CVC words. We practice for maybe 5-10 minutes a few times a week, and do lots of rhyming and letter games when we are in the car. She has always loved letters and reading, it comes very naturally for her. I want to encourage her learning to decode and read but I’m kind of just shooting in the dark. Basically I just pick a short vowel and consonant ending (it, at, an, un, etc) and add consonants at the beginning to practice sounding them out. All very basic still, but she’s starting to make the connections. We will do like 3-5 words, and then she will ask to spell other random words, then gets bored and runs off (which is totally fine with me, 10 minutes of focus is excellent for a 3 year old).

Should I just keep on with this, or would it make sense to bite the bullet and get a reading curriculum, with the goal of still keeping the lessons short and fun? I remember my mom doing hooked on phonics with me as a kid but I didn’t actually learn to read till 1st grade. My main reason for having interest in a curriculum is just that it will be a bit more methodical and I won’t have to re-invent the wheel. But I don’t want to push beyond what she is interested in yet. I just know English phonics can be very complicated and has a LOT of rules, so being somewhat methodical would seem to have its advantages just to be sure we’re covering all the basics and not missing critical rules.

Also, feel free to tell me that I’m way overthinking this and just need to chill lol.

My husband is a musician and I studied music in college. We recently noticed out 3 year old seems to typically sing songs in the key of the recording. I wouldn’t say her pitch is 100% accurate, but it’s decent and improving constantly. Neither of us has a strong background in music pedagogy. Just wondering what I can do to continue to foster her ability. We sing constantly -Disney, country, folk, hymns, musical theater, and made up songs. She has some toy instruments that she messes around on. That’s about it.

Ok I know this sounds crazy, but I swear my 7 month old consistently calls out “aaaaama” every time he sees me across the room and is upset/wants me. Like it’s super consistent as of this week. Is this a thing? I never in my life would have expected a 7 month old to do anything more than babble, but it is really consistent and context dependent.

We were practicing “dada” this morning and he was repeating that one and looking at my husband every time as well, but I haven’t seen him produce that one independently yet.

Am I a delusional proud mom? Has anyone else experienced this? My first born was way more into baby sign when she was little and I feel like that didn’t kick off until like 9-10 months?

I feel like I’m at a huge crossroads and it is stressing me the fuck out.

I work a middle class 9-5 and my husband is a freelancer. His income has recently increased quite a bit although not enough to cover all our expenses. It also fluctuates from month to month since he’s freelance.

I have been working remote after having my baby, but work said I need to start coming in 2 days a week.

I was just offered a promotion at my job, it would be like a 20-30% increase from my current salary. But we would not see very much of it at all, because our oldest is currently in daycare on a scholarship. The pay increase would disqualify us from the scholarship, so most of the pay bump would end up just covering her daycare out of pocket.

I want to be a SAHM -it breaks my heart that my kiddo is away at daycare all day. We had also talked about homeschooling at one point because the schools near us are very poor quality. Taking this promotion would basically be shutting the door on that goal. But quitting feels so risky with my husband’s variable income. I would likely need to find part time work to help cover expenses. He works a lot on nights and weekends because of his industry so I worry I’d just be doing all the work all the time.

I just feel so angry that there’s no good solution. This promotion offer doesn’t even fix anything or make things easier. Quitting risks putting us in a financially precarious situation. I just hate it so much.

My baby lives in my ring sling but he is getting a little big and I hate making dinner with limited use of one hand. I would like something my husband could use too. Recs on easy on/off structured carriers that you can use on your back or front?

I remember as a kid making friends instantly at playgrounds/events. Walking up to a kid and initiating a game and begging my mom to organize playdates by the end of the day. Never to see the kid again, but it didn’t really matter because we would find someone new to play with next time.

My three year old gets rebuffed pretty consistently when we go to playgrounds. She is pro-social, perfectly decent at sharing and taking turns for her age, friendly, empathetic (often asks friends if they need a hug or if they are ok if they get hurt). Yet kids pretty consistently will refuse to play with her on the playground. I don’t think it’s anything she’s doing, I notice kids generally just are playing by themselves, with their parents, or a sibling.

I’m a somewhat “old school” parent -I don’t run around on the playground with her very often basically as a matter of principle. We do coloring, puzzles, and read books together at home. But I am of the opinion that play is the work of children, and kids should be playing with other kids to get the benefits of learning how to share, negotiate, develop problem solving skills and empathy.

Anybody else notice this? Is there something I should be doing differently? My kid has lots of friends and they play together well, so I really don’t think it’s anything my kid is doing.