Not sure what’s wrong with me
Hi, this is a throw away account, I just want opinions regarding some of my thoughts. Which sounds a bit weird but I’ll explain.
I have trouble empathising with people when I think their problems are stupid or if I’ve gone through the same thing but I’ve complained less or worked hard to get through it.
I don’t like people who complain and have cries about things. I hate that part of myself because I think there’s something wrong with me, I won’t tell anyone I don’t care. I’ll pretend that I do care, even offer help but the truth is that it pisses me off so much.
My sister has medical trauma, she doesn’t have many “good” or “visible” veins, in the hospital they kept sticking needles in her to get bloods done. Now she has issues with needles and blood tests in general. I was with her during a medical thing and she was getting bloods and she started crying, I was so embarrassed and was annoyed that she made a big deal out of it. I know she has trauma but my brain is just like “get over it”.
My other sister got something in her eye once and was upset cause she was having trouble opening her eye. She was asking people to make her a sandwich and to bring her eye drops etc. the whole thing just made me mad. I feel like a lot of the time I’m refraining from rolling my eyes.
I do a lot for my family, I’ve been treated as third parent/counsellor/friend/lawyer etc. our dynamic isn’t normal. I’m expected to always do everything and help everyone (which is rarely reciprocated). I’m unsure if this is how I developed this annoyance and apathy towards them when it’s small stuff.
I was just wondering if anyone has had similar thoughts?
Thanks