BW28
Hi everyone. I’ve never been in a space like this before but I am searching for advice. I’m a 28 year old Black woman in the Detroit area. I was diagnosed with GHSV2 3 years ago after having an outbreak. That’s the only one I’ve ever had and my doctor informed me that it wasn’t an initial outbreak so I’m really not sure how long I’ve had it or how long it’s been lying dormant in my system.
With that being said, i went on meds for like all of 2023 but stopped because I haven’t had another outbreak since then but I do disclose when I do date. Unfortunately it still has been difficult to find someone who is accepting and/or also has it and is equally yoked and looking for the same things I’m looking for. It does make me very sad.
Recently I’ve reconnected with someone who I’ve known for over 10 years. He met me before I was diagnosed and we’ve been cordial over the years. He lives out of state and last month he visited Detroit and we had our first date and it was practically perfect and we’ve been talking everyday since. Today we both admitted that we’re falling for each other. But with the distance, I haven’t had the opportunity to tell him face to face that I have GHSV2. It’s a conversation I prefer to have in person. We have not been physically intimate nor did we kiss or anything on our date.
I’m visiting his city in two weeks. My sister lives in the same city as him and she’s getting married and it just happened to align with the next time me and him wanted to see each other. I already had planned on telling him about my status the next time we saw each other, I just didn’t think so many emotions and feelings would be involved like they are. I don’t want him to feel like I was manipulating him because I really didn’t expect us to be so compatible and have so much chemistry. I am so worried and I already have anxiety really bad.
On top of the fact that I have GHSV2, I also have hidradenitis supparativa and endometriosis. He knows about the endometriosis and I planned to just tell him about the other two when I see him because honestly these are my biggest insecurities in relationships.
Any advice or words of encouragement? I just want to be happy for once and feel respected in my relationship and accepted. I haven’t been able to meet someone who has GHSV2 that is in the same space as I am and genuinely looking to build in a way that makes sense to me. I don’t know.. I did one dating app for people who are positive but it didn’t feel safe to me. I get scared about being exposed because I’m well known in my city and I’m involved in a lot of different social groups. I am also a DV and SV survivor so my dating experience overall is extremely complex.
Sigh… plz anything will help me navigate this.