u/Historical_Big_8555

First off I want to apologize, I know this question has been asked many times before I can’t find the answer though. I want to add white sand over my black sand. The actual aquarium sand is kind of pricey. Is there a cheaper way to go? I’ve heard people say pool filter sand but I’ve only seen 50lb bags and I really don’t need that much. Any suggestions or should I just get aquarium?

First off I want to make it clear I don’t care if people are nonbinary or anything other than cisgender. Not that it means much but I am a 44 year old lesbian. I don’t understand why people, when someone first meets someone they say “hi my name is … and I go by they/them pronouns”. I just say ok and move on with the conversation. I just don’t understand why that’s necessary to do. I don’t introduce myself to people and tell them I’m gay. If it comes up then obviously you’d say something.

Please don’t bash me for this. I’m probably just old and don’t understand the stuff.

Edit for more context. The person it most happened with recently was a social worker that came to my house for my autistic niece. They didn’t even say their name. They flat out said “hi I go by they them how are you?” I had to say my name and asked for them. If the person is someone that’s potentially going to be a friend then yes it’s necessary. Would I do it in the first interaction. If the situation warrants it. In a case, like waitstaff at a restaurant I see the point in putting it on the name tag. Most people say miss or sir. When I was younger nobody understood me being gay. Maybe I just have the same problem.