My manager exaggerated on my mistakes and said I’m not listening
First time posting here and I really need some advice.
I worked with my previous manager for two years, and he was always positive about my performance. When he left the company, he recommended that I move to the bigger office because there would be more support for my chartership. Around the same time, our company acquired a smaller company, so now there’s an “old” and “new” team.
For the first six months after moving, I mainly helped the old team, which had fewer than five people. My new manager said she felt I didn’t have the experience expected of someone with two years’ experience because my previous manager had handled most things himself. I accepted that as a weakness and started putting more effort into asking questions, learning from colleagues, and reviewing my work carefully.
Since February, I’ve mainly worked with the new team, mostly on graphics because that’s one of my strengths. I’ve repeatedly asked for more site visits and technical tasks, but there haven’t been many opportunities. My manager is usually busy with client relationships and bids, so I rely on the wider team for work. I don’t really have chance to chat with her daily.
The feedback I’ve received directly from colleagues about my graphics work has been positive, both verbally and in messages. I do make occasional minor mistakes, like missing small drawing details, but I correct them quickly when they’re pointed out. I always meet deadlines and ask questions when I’m unsure. However, I rarely receive structured feedback, positive or negative, after submitting work, which has left me feeling anxious and isolated at work. It is also sad to see other people at the same grade get more tasks as they are closer to some of the senior colleagues. I was so anxious that my brain can‘t stop rest after work and thought of finding the office mental health first aider but they are mostly upper rank people.
Three weeks ago, I asked my manager how she thought I was doing as I wanted some constructive feedback. She said she could see improvement and told me to relax. I also raised concerns about only being given graphics tasks, and she told me I needed to ask the team for more technical work. She also said she appreciated how responsible I am especially when I work overtime to match her schedule and meet urgent deadlines.
Today, during another review, her feedback changed completely. She said my improvement had slowed down and that I “don’t listen.” I explained that I take notes carefully and check my work thoroughly. While I still make small mistakes sometimes, they are much less frequent now.
She also said other colleagues felt I didn’t understand briefs properly and told me “you can’t only get 30% right.” This shocked me because I’d never received feedback like that directly from anyone, and I genuinely believed most of my work was completed to a good standard. She repeatedly referred to one example where a colleague updated something herself after a client meeting because it was quicker while the discussion was still fresh in her mind. Another criticism was that I completed a task slower than expected because I was waiting for images from another colleague, which I have told her during the task.
She also blamed me for a mistake that happened after I followed her markup, even though I had already warned her it might not work. She then said people don’t give me tasks because of these mistakes, although other people at my level are also struggling with low workloads because of the market and the seniors not being able to find projects. My manager doesn’t assign me much work because she’s focused on business development. What hurt most was when she said it was unfair that newer colleagues who had only been at the company for six months were paid less than me despite doing more work. I wasn’t given enough opportunities to help with more tasks.
After the meeting, I spoke to other colleagues directly and they said they were happy with my work. I don’t know whether they’ve said something different to my manager privately, but I have no written evidence either way.
This afternoon I had a panic attack in the office and felt completely overwhelmed and unsupported. I honestly don’t know what to do next. Has anyone experienced something similar, or can anyone advise me on how to handle this situation?