u/Honest_Cow1001

Argument for not dropping out of high school?

My son is 15 and the youngest of three boys. He’s a freshman in high school. He has struggled his whole life - he has Hashimoto’s which definitely affects mental clarity. He has ADHD inattentive. He has auditory processing disorder, sleep apnea & after a traumatic event, he developed alopecia on top of it all. All of this combined has given him a 504 plan. Preferential seating, repeat instructions, check for understanding.. but despite how hard he tries he’s failing classes. I had him evaluated for possible LD, and maybe he could get an IEP. They evaluated him and said no, he doesn’t qualify. No LD, no reading disability.. he can’t read a paragraph. He can’t problem solve to save his life. I have had him evaluated in the past with a neuro psych doctor, bc he’s always had struggles. Nothing came of that either. I want my son to succeed. I know that not every kid fits into the school system. I tried to homeschool him but hit the same walls, but especially because I work too much, it wasn’t good for him.
He’s always been very logical. If he was going to get in trouble when he was younger he’d weigh the consequences and say “I’m ok with the trade off” and he’d do the thing he wanted to do and take the punishment. He is very logical and literal. So now with the quitting school argument.
Him: What difference does it make? He doesn’t think he can succeed in college so what does it matter?
Me: It matters bc you don’t want to limit your options in the future, and this is a non optional part of life.
Him: I tried really hard this year and I’m failing 2 classes. so what if I just stop trying altogether? Then what?
Me: then you might have to repeat a grade
Him: ok so then what, how many times will I have to repeat a grade before they just let me leave hs?
Me: idk you’d probably eventually age out. But usually teachers honor your efforts so you can’t just give up.
Him: but they don’t honor my efforts. So why bother trying? What’s the difference if I fail for years or drop out now? I could get a job and start working full time and contribute to the household. At least then I’ll be starting my life and stop wasting my time somewhere I can’t succeed.
Me: it’s about character- being the same person everywhere you go. Being the guy who never gives up.
Him: my effort doesn’t equal success at school but it could somewhere else at a job somewhere. So why not be somewhere I can be more successful?

I’m exasperated and I feel his pain. I don’t know what logical reasoning can keep him engaged and trying and the school doesn’t do enough to accommodate him, and it’s hard to expect them to when they have hundreds of students. He’s slipping through the cracks of their system. He’s not built for it. Help?

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u/Honest_Cow1001 — 1 day ago

How Do People Afford to Live?

I live in a relatively affordable area (WNY). Minimum wage is $16/hr. I make around $21-22/hr (I work two jobs). Cost of housing is less than the national average. I have to move due to circumstances outside my control. Yet I can’t find anywhere as affordable as WNY. Pay rate is much less everywhere I’m looking, yet housing is way more. How does anyone live anywhere? I was willing to work a full time job and a part time job to make ends meet- but moving anywhere else seems to make living impossible. I have kids to support. I have two big dogs. I could do it if it were just me.

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u/Honest_Cow1001 — 11 days ago

If you could live anywhere in the United States where would you go?

Whether it’s staying where you are or moving across the country… where is your favorite (livable) place?

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u/Honest_Cow1001 — 20 days ago