u/HorrorPitiful1977

Please read it fully because otherwise it might just read like I'm being messy which I am seriously not trying to be.

for a little context:

my best friend (K) has been in a continuous cycle of serial dating without a break for the past ~7 years. K had a long term partner (i'll call them A) for about 5 years and lived with him as well. when it was starting to come to an end, they mutually opened their relationship* and starting dating another person (B) while still with A (they all knew each other and hung out so it was all ethical atp. they were not all dating each other).

* During this time, A was also seeing someone new and K was super upset at A and criticizing his partner even thought they had their own new partner and was actively wanting to leave the relationship with A even before he started seeing someone else.

After the relationship with A failed within ~1 year of opening the relationship, K immediately got a new apartment and moved in with B. The relationship with B started failing within a year and K once again "mutually" opened their relationship with B while still being in a relationship. Shortly after this, K met C and immediately started thinking they found the love of their life, talking shit on B to me and C (they showed me convos) all the while B was feeling really insecure and telling K "youre going to leave me for him just like you did A with me" and they repeatedly brushed him off. K finally broke it off with B and kicked him out of their apartment.

K is now exclusively with C.

Current dilemma:

K has now been with C for about a year. During the first few months of them meeting after ending things with B (about 2-3 months) they were telling me that they've found their soulmate but were so afraid that things would turn dogshit "like the rest of them" and I keot telling them to stay cautious and don't move too fast to get to know C.

Everything was moving so fast that even another friend mentioned that they thought they were moving too quickly because in that 3 months,
they were getting to know each other, K gave this man (C) the KEYS to their apartment and C gave them the passcode to get into his at K's request. I don't care what anyone says that is insane to me to give to someone youve only known for 2-3 months. K got mad at both me AND the friend for saying they moved to fast but eventually dropped it.

So during this entire year and a half the whole relationship has had its ups and downs and the constant dilemma with K (because they choose to confide in me) is that they are having sex, calling on the phone every night, staying at each others houses for days on end, K is watching C's dog and apartment while he's out of town (even though he lives 40 min away from K's house), they go on dates, and do all the relationship things that exist in a relationship. But he keeps telling K that he "isn't ready for a relationship".

This man doesn't house or pet sit for K (I do!!) and he barely even took care of K when they broke their ankle and was shit talking me because I(!!!) was the one taking care of them and it made him feel like I was "looking down on him", taking them to appointments, and bringing them food while they were severely injured.

I've told K that he's showing them exactly how he feels and isn't being transparent or serious and they got mad at me and continued to defend him.

Fast forward to today, they've found a new apartment that's a 10 minute walk away from his apartment. regardless of them saying they had a "big talk" a few days ago and he's still saying he isnt ready fir a relationship.

To be honest, I know my friend is being stupid as fuck and delusional but I think I just need more advice than anything. I know my friend will di what they want but I honestly just need advice on how to navigate this because I'm honestly just worried for their safety and wellbeing while they obviously decide to ignore red flags.

If needed, please ask for more details to make a sound response. I'm more than happy to provide information that I haven't been able to in this post.

Thanks.

edit: this man's excuse for not being there more for K post surgery was that "he doesn't prioritize himself enough and doesn't have enough if himself to give to another person for a relationship"

hi, my cat tubbs will be 4 this year in july. i've had him since he was born. my partner and i often take our cats out in the backyard for supervised outdoors time for enrichment. we don't leave them outside to free roam.

unfortunately yesterday we took tubbs out with us while we were doing some work in the backyard and he immediately ambushed and killed a bird in the bushes which he's never done before (not for a lack of trying). we took it away from him and put him back in the house.

the problem now is that he's always loved going outside and would yell and paw at the door when he wants to go out but now he has completely amped up his volume and screams incessantly at the back door to get out which seriously disturbing. we have an additional door leading to the basement that we close so that he cant go to get to the back door and scream, be he's now just started pawing, knocking the door, and screaming even louder to get out no matter what we do.

i know this will only keep up due to knowing his personality and i'm just unsure of what to do now or how to calm this behavior. any advice would be immensely helpful. thank you all!