u/Hot_Huckleberry_6236

this is a throwaway account because obvious reasons.

So a few months ago my fiancé Jake (M20) (fake name) had one of his younger (18) female cousins accuse him of raping her when she was 8-9.

He told me it wasn’t true and I believed him because I have known him since he was young and he’s been a good person. But last night he broke down and told me that it may be partially true but he’s not sure. I asked him to explain, and through a long emotional breakdown of a conversation he said he might have had sex with her when they were younger (12 and 10).

Both sets of parents didn’t really parent/watch their young kids when they were together to stop any of this behavior, they weren’t good parents.

Jake said it was a very fuzzy memory that he’s not even sure it’s real, both him and his cousin were sadly exposed to sexual material at a very young age so they both knew what the action was but didn’t understand the severity of it. He told me that they started off by just touching each other down their pants. But at that point they had both knew how sex worked and both wanted to know what it felt like, so he thinks they may have had slight penetration that was mutually agreed upon and he might have “released” onto her. Neither one of them had went through puberty yet.

This was almost 10 years ago and Jake said he’s not even sure if that memory is real but if it is, it only happened that one time and he’s felt disgusted by it ever since.

He loves his cousins like sisters, he to this day would die trying to protect them from harm, they were close growing up until just a little bit before this (for unrelated reasons entirely). He told me that he never thought about doing anything like that with her or any other family member again.

But his family has disowned him and he feels like a disgusting human being and a rapist. Because he “took advantage of her when she was so young”

I don’t think it’s his fault I believe he is just as much a victim as she is but he won’t believe me, I don’t know what to do to help. Hence why I’m making this post. What do you guys think?

this is a throwaway account because obvious reasons.

So a few months ago my fiancé Jake (M20) (fake name) had one of his younger (18) female cousins accuse him of raping her when she was 8-9.

He told me it wasn’t true and I believed him because I have known him since he was young and he’s been a good person. But last night he broke down and told me that it may be partially true but he’s not sure. I asked him to explain, and through a long emotional breakdown of a conversation he said he might have had sex with her when they were younger (12 and 10).

Both sets of parents didn’t really parent/watch their young kids when they were together to stop any of this behavior, they weren’t good parents.

Jake said it was a very fuzzy memory that he’s not even sure it’s real, both him and his cousin were sadly exposed to sexual material at a very young age so they both knew what the action was but didn’t understand the severity of it. He told me that they started off by just touching each other down their pants. But at that point they had both knew how sex worked and both wanted to know what it felt like, so he thinks they may have had slight penetration that was mutually agreed upon and he might have “released” onto her. Neither one of them had went through puberty yet.

This was almost 10 years ago and Jake said he’s not even sure if that memory is real but if it is, it only happened that one time and he’s felt disgusted by it ever since.

He loves his cousins like sisters, he to this day would die trying to protect them from harm, they were close growing up until just a little bit before this (for unrelated reasons entirely). He told me that he never thought about doing anything like that with her or any other family member again.

But his family has disowned him and he feels like a disgusting human being and a rapist. Because he “took advantage of her when she was so young”

I don’t think it’s his fault I believe he is just as much a victim as she is but he won’t believe me, hence why I’m making this post. What do you guys think?

*EDIT* I want to make this VERY CLEAR. My fiancé nor I hate/dislike this cousin for the way she feels, because she is justified. We still love her dearly and respect her decision to be no contact with us.