u/Icy_Mulberry_5258

Hi everyone, I’m reaching out to this community because I’m looking for insights on how to heal a deeply stressed body. I’ve realized I am trapped in a severe cycle of overtraining and compulsive exercise, and my physical well-being is collapsing because of it.

Over the past year, I have gained 9kg (approx. 20lbs and I am now 80kg) despite an incredibly high activity level and no increase in calories. Instead of listening to my body's warning signs, my anxiety has driven me to train even harder, terrified that stopping will accelerate the weight gain. I have trained this hard for over two decades.

My Stats & Current Routine:

Profile: 43yo female, mom of three.
The Load: I push through 12–14 hours of heavy training per week. I track everything using an Apple Watch and Oura ring, aiming for a mandatory 800+ kcal burn from workouts daily. With daily steps and functional movement, my total active burn is usually over 1200 kcal a day.

Health Context: I have Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA) and Hypothyroidism, and I am on a heavy daily medication regimen (including Methotrexate and Adalimumab). My recent labs show my thyroid levels and iron (ferritin) are at the very lower end of the "normal" range.

The Red Flags I’ve Been Ignoring:

1. Total Physical Shutdown: I experience extreme fatigue, often literally falling asleep at my desk right after a hard swim or spin session. My hair has also thinned over the last years.
2. The Tracker Obsession & Rest Anxiety: My life is entirely dictated by closing my rings and hitting Oura targets. I cannot allow myself to have a rest day. Even when my joints are painful from RA, I force myself to substitute activities (like switching to high-intensity spinning or swimming) just to hit my daily calorie goals.
3. The Post-Workout High Trap: Every time I finish a workout, I feel great. I get that rush of accomplishment and a deep sense of success. I am self-aware enough to recognize that this isn't healthy anymore—I am relying on that endorphin rush to quiet the intense anxiety and guilt of resting.
4. Paradoxical Performance: Because I can still hit max-intensity workouts (Max HR 183), I gaslight myself into thinking "See? My body is performing, so I must be fine."

The Dilemma:
I am absolutely terrified of cutting back because of the weight gain. However, I am starting to logically understand that forcing 14 hours of exercise and a massive daily burn on an already metabolically stressed, medicated body is likely causing massive cortisol spikes and severe fluid retention. I am achieving the exact opposite of what I want.

Has anyone else here successfully recovered from severe overtraining or exercise obsession, especially while managing chronic illness? How do you mentally cope with taking off the fitness trackers, giving up that daily feeling of accomplishment, and letting your body actually heal without feeling like you are losing control?

Any advice on how to safely break this cycle and lower my body's stress levels would be so appreciated. Thank you.

Hi everyone, I’m reaching out here because I’m at my absolute wits' end. I’ve realized I am deeply trapped in a cycle of compulsive exercise and data obsession, driven by an intense fear of weight gain, and my body is completely breaking down because of it.

Over the past year, I have gained a significant amount of weight despite a very high activity level. Instead of realizing my body is screaming for help, my anxiety has only forced me to obsess over fitness trackers even more. I am terrified of losing control if I stop.

My Routine & The Data Obsession:
The Compulsion: I am a 43yo mom of three, pushing myself through hours and hours of heavy training per week. I track everything obsessively using my Apple Watch and Oura ring.
The Targets: My absolute rule is to hit extremely high calorie burn targets through focused workouts every single day. When adding my daily functional movement and steps, my total daily active calorie burn is excessively high.
Health Context: I do have Rheumatoid Arthritis and Hypothyroidism, and I'm on a heavy daily medication regimen. My body is already under a lot of baseline metabolic stress, which makes this routine even more dangerous.

How my exercise addiction is manifesting right now:

1. Enslaved by the trackers: My life is entirely dictated by the rings on my watch and the data on my Oura app. I cannot allow myself to have a rest day, no matter how tired I am. If I feel too exhausted for one activity, my anxiety forces me to substitute it with hours of spinning or swimming just to hit that mandatory daily workout goal.

2. The temporary high vs. reality: Every single time I finish a workout, I feel great. I get that rush of accomplishment and a deep sense of success. But I am self-aware enough to recognize that this isn't healthy anymore—I am relying on that post-workout high to quiet the intense anxiety and guilt of not moving.

3. Total physical meltdown: I experience extreme fatigue, often literally falling asleep at my desk right after a workout. My body is exhausted and screaming for rest, but my brain won't let me stop until the trackers say I've hit my numbers.

4. Using performance to deny the problem: Because I can still somehow hit max-intensity workouts and reach a very high max heart rate, I use that performance and the high calorie numbers as an excuse to gaslight myself into thinking "See? Your body is working fine, you can keep going."

The Dilemma & My Fear:
I am absolutely terrified of cutting back or taking off my trackers because I'm afraid the weight gain will accelerate even more. However, I am starting to logically understand that forcing endless hours of exercise and a massive daily burn on an already stressed and medicated body is likely causing massive cortisol spikes and severe fluid retention. I am achieving the exact opposite of what I want.

Has anyone else struggled with severe exercise addiction, tracker obsession, and the absolute terror of backing off? How do you mentally cope with taking off the watch/Oura, giving up that feeling of accomplishment, and letting your body heal when every fiber of your being is telling you that resting will cause more weight gain?

Any advice, words of wisdom, or shared experiences would be life-saving right now. Thank you for reading.