u/Ihatethebanjo

(My hair has never been bleached just throwing that out there) so I dyed my hair brown with box dye randomly one day and I liked it so I’ve just had it like that for a year now..I dyed it a few other times to make it the shade I wanted so it wasn’t a one time thing. I’m kinda wanting to go back to blond because I think it suits me better but growing it back out would be a pain and the roots look weird since my hair is so much darker now. Is the process to getting it dyed blond even a good idea at this point? I don’t think my hair is damaged but I’m not sure. If it sounds like a possible thing to do I’ll go get a consultation but I don’t wanna bother if it’s not possible at this point. I don’t know how much box dye damages it so that’s why I’m asking 👀

I’m 20 now and people have started talking about babies or grandkids, or in relationships a big question as this age is “do you want kids” and that is a huge basis on whether or not the relationship will work. I don’t know how to explain because it doesn’t seem like anyone else is considering this but I’ve heard a lot of horror stories about pregnancy and birth, like deadly stuff. From a lot of women I know. Including my own mother, but then when I say I don’t know if I wanna have kids, they back track and say “oh well it’s not THAT bad, you’d have the cutest kids!” Like you just told me you could feel your entire c section AND you almost bled to death..now you’re encouraging me, your own daughter, your own niece, to risk my life just to make cute babies? I don’t understand it…why is everyone taking this so lightly? Even my boyfriend is talking about it lightly, I asked him “doesn’t the idea scare you? Of someone you love going through that and possibly dying?” And he says the same thing as everyone else “people do it all the time”..clearly he doesn’t know what I know. And other people don’t like when you speak up about the bad, dangerous possibilities. Everyone is suddenly telling me they think it’s a great idea, even the people who care for me the most, barely even considering how torturous it could be? I know everyone is different when it comes to symptoms and outcomes but it seems like everyone I know has a story about having a baby that they describe as the worst time in their life. I’m not opposed to having a kid but I panic and get nauseous at the thought of putting myself through that on only MY risk and even more that the people who love me are just fine with it and not giving my feelings a second thought. I could never put my spouse through that, or my mom, or my aunt, or anyone. Am I the only one? I feel this weird pressure and confusion as to why people are ok with it. I don’t wanna see it that way, but I genuinely can’t wrap my mind around how lightly people take this with so little concern. And the fact that people want a kid, but they aren’t really fond on the idea of adopting? I know I could just find someone who wants to adopt but it just sucks when you find someone you really love and it’s a possibility that whether or not ME, MYSELF, AND I am willing to risk my life and break my body apart instead of just to have a biological kid could be a deal breaker. It’s not fair. Just my rant lol my mind is mixed up and confused and it’s driving me insane thinking about any of this. Sorry if that was everywhere and barely makes sense.