u/IisBubbles — reddlx

Gatekeep-y lesbians all over all my socials during pride month

Im just tired of seeing constant "Happy Pride! Reminder! If you have any attraction to men you cant identify as a lesbian!" Or "Happy Pride! Reminder if youre not 100% a woman you cant identify as a lesbian!" Its exhausting. One of my biggest issues with it is what does gatekeeping lables even do? God forbid a bisexual woman refer to herself as a lesbian as a joke or use "bi lesbian" or change her id to lesbian because she is choosing to not date men. Ive noticed a lot of trad lesbians in online spaces consistently yelling these points from the rooftops (and/or harassing bi women who do any of the things i stated), while irl I have never expirienced a sapphic event where the specifics of your label mattered. Like are we really putting this much energy into making sure people "identify correctly" ??

Also everyone is allowed pref ofc, but is it just me or do people who say they're les4les often mean theyre bi/transphobic? it doesnt make much sense to me because what about a bisexual woman's attraction to men makes her so different from a lesbian? (and ive seen a lot of les4les specifically not include trans women bc "genital preference" which im not saying is inherently bad, just usually a red flag ime)

I understand not wanting to date people who center men/patriarchy but that has nothing to do with your sexual orientation and everything to do with if a person has deconstructed patriarchy. I feel so often these conversations kind of build this stereotype of bi women where they aren't able to have a fulfilling relationship with another woman because of their attraction to men, which imo feels pretty biphobic and built on the "promiscuous bisexual" stereotype, especially if the relationship is theoretically monogamous.

And what is so sacred about the term lesbian that so many trad lesbians dont want bisexual women to use it, even in a joking manner, or just to refer to the fact that they are into women/as a political identifier as its been used forever?

Overall, it feels like chronically online ID politics that harm our community more than help it. Have you guys seen this type of rhetoric everywhere? Do you respond to people or just ignore? If you respond what do you say?

Also if you think im really off base with the les4les thing please let me know as im still trying to figure out my thoughts on it. Im generally t4t so I understand dynamics like that but to me its like, bisexual women aren't inherently a lesbian woman's oppressor if that makes sense? At least not in the same way that a cis person is to a trans person. Preferences are highly personal so im never going to say someone cant do something, but it gives me red flag vibes.

reddit.com

u/IisBubbles — 1 day ago

▲ 61 r/Bunnies

Rehoming my bunnies, please read before messaging me if youre interested

Located near Salt Lake City, UT

3-4 years ago I rescued Edward (the black long hair) off the street, 2 years later i rescued Ruby off the same street (it took those 2 years for us to catch her). Ive been taking care of them as the shelters have all been pretty overwhelmed with rabbits and I didnt want them to be in that situation.

This has been a very hard decision to rehome them. Unfortunately my partner and sister both have an extreme hay allergy (found out after getting bunnies) and my mom has an extreme bunny allergy (also found out after), I suspect im also allergic to bunnies and Unfortunately these allergies have just gotten worse with time. So we are looking to rehome them as im struggling to care for them myself and im worried my allergies will also get worse and I won't be able to care for them.

Edward is a black long hair neutered male. He is estimated to be about 5, but we dont actually know, he didnt seem to be fully mature when we found him though so 5 is what im guessing at the maximum. He usually refuses to walk on anything but carpet (unless Ruby convinces him to, which she has done a few times) hes very friendly, loves pets and doing tricks but does NOT like being picked up. We've tried to work with him over the about 3-4 years we have had him and I dont think he will ever get there. He will allow you to pick him up wrapped in a blanket sometimes (we only do this if we have to for one reason or another)

Ruby is a short hair tan UNSPAYED female. Im not sure her age, we have had her for about 2 years and i watched her outside for about 2 years before catching her and she was definitely mature when we caight her, but I have no idea other than that. I want her to go to a home that will be able to spay her because I know of the cancer risk but I am not in a financial place to get her spayed. She is less openly friendly than Edward but will let you pick her up...she doesnt love it, but she will tolerate being held. She is kind of a menace (she will chew on any and all wood) and doesnt have the best litterbox tendencies, but I am pretty sure thats mostly because she is still intact. She goes in the letterbox mostly, but also goes in the middle of the floor randomly

They will come with all their things, litter boxes, toys, hay bags, food, hutch etc.

The biggest thing I want is for them to go to a better situation than they are in now, their care is good but they get almost no socialization because of allergies and they (Edward especially) love to get pet and do tricks and play. They've never been around little kids but do well with older kids, they do well with dogs and cats and are not scared at all of them (Ruby can be at first but she warms up really easy) obviously, we always supervise the whole time theyre around other animals.

I am willing to meet somewhere or bring them to you if it means they will be in a good situation.

u/IisBubbles — 1 month ago

▲ 6 r/DID

Just started the newest season of Ghosts (didnt even realize it was out lol) and I forgot how relatable it was.

The beginning if the 5th season theyre trying to make friends and its really hard for Sam to socialize when the Ghosts are also a part of the conversation and the humans cant see/hear them, she gets confused and awkward and struggles to make it through a conversation.

Im realizing how much I feel like this when I go out and am trying to talk to people but theres often constant interjections and it can be hard to deal with, its hard to follow whats happening irl and what's in my head seperately...and often I lose the convo thread and just forget what I was saying/what the conversation is about.

Anyone else watch it and relate?

Also, any coping mechanisms?

I worked with a therapist and got to a point where I was able to build more of a communication system internally ? But I had to change therapists and have been on a waiting list for a DID knowledgeable one for like 2 years. We feel more in touch with each other and info gets passed around a lot easier but everyone also feels very loud all of the time and my memory is still pretty bad, but I generally dont lose days anymore.

Idk I feel like ive been stuck in this place for these 2 years and it kind of has isolated me into my own world. I interact with people but its hard to make deeper connections when theres this whole complex part of you that involves deep explaining and exploring to really like, understand?

My partner knows everything and its so nice to interact with them, but outside of that it feels like theres this layer of distance with everyone because I have this persona that is somewhat me. I assign my go to faves and everything but it also doesnt actually fit any of us alone. And i dont really feel like i can just relax and be my true self when im around anyone other than my partner, im kind of playing a role.

I dont really know what to do next, eventually I will work with a therapist again, but in the meantime is there any good resources? Should I even try to do anything without guidance?

reddit.com

u/IisBubbles — 1 month ago