u/Ill-Tangerine-4808

I’ve been friends with this girl for about 3 years, but over the past 8 months, we became incredibly close. We are super attached, completely unhinged together, and extremely comfortable around each other. We basically spend our entire day together on calls or Google Meet.

Naturally, I started developing strong feelings for her. Recently, things got complicated—we had a fight, and the truth came out that I’m in love with her. She made it clear that she doesn't feel the same way and just sees me as a good friend. Neither of us wants to ruin our bond, so we agreed to just act normally like nothing changed.

But I am suffering.

She currently has a boyfriend (she calls it a "timepass" relationship), and knowing about him makes me incredibly jealous. I try so hard not to let my feelings get in the way of our friendship, but it’s killing me in the background.

I know I have great qualities, but my biggest setback is physical attraction. I’m short, fat, I honestly look ugly, and my voice is a little girlish. I feel like my looks are the only reason I’m stuck in this situation.

I actually tried talking to her about this recently. I told her I needed space so I could move on and we could eventually save our bond. The problem is, we are both so deeply attached to each other in a friendly way that if we try to step back, we both just fall into a massive void. We end up right back where we started because we miss the friendship too much.

I am so happy whenever she is around me, but I am in so much pain when I remember she is dating someone else. I can't see any way out of this cycle. Can anyone suggest what I should do?

plus: i am also so attached and i fr love her and care for her too much that i am ready to be misrable for it

TL;DR: Caught feelings for my female best friend of 3 years. She knows but only sees me as a friend. She has a temporary boyfriend which makes me jealous. I tried asking for space to save our bond, but we are both so attached to the friendship that stepping back leaves us both in a void. I’m insecure about my looks and stuck in a painful cycle. I can't see a way out and need advice.

I’ve been friends with this girl for about 3 years, but over the past 8 months, we became incredibly close. We are super attached, completely unhinged together, and extremely comfortable around each other. We basically spend our entire day together on calls or Google Meet.

Naturally, I started developing strong feelings for her. Recently, things got complicated—we had a fight, and the truth came out that I’m in love with her. She made it clear that she doesn't feel the same way and just sees me as a good friend. Neither of us wants to ruin our bond, so we agreed to just act normally like nothing changed.

But I am suffering.

She currently has a boyfriend (she calls it a "timepass" relationship), and knowing about him makes me incredibly jealous. I try so hard not to let my feelings get in the way of our friendship, but it’s killing me in the background.

I know I have great qualities, but my biggest setback is physical attraction. I’m short, fat, I honestly look ugly, and my voice is a little girlish. I feel like my looks are the only reason I’m stuck in this situation.

I actually tried talking to her about this recently. I told her I needed space so I could move on and we could eventually save our bond. The problem is, we are both so deeply attached to each other in a friendly way that if we try to step back, we both just fall into a massive void. We end up right back where we started because we miss the friendship too much.

I am so happy whenever she is around me, but I am in so much pain when I remember she is dating someone else. I can't see any way out of this cycle. Can anyone suggest what I should do?

plus: i am also so attached and i fr love her and care for her too much that i am ready to be misrable for it

TL;DR: Caught feelings for my female best friend of 3 years. She knows but only sees me as a friend. She has a temporary boyfriend which makes me jealous. I tried asking for space to save our bond, but we are both so attached to the friendship that stepping back leaves us both in a void. I’m insecure about my looks and stuck in a painful cycle. I can't see a way out and need advice.