Online Friend Dating
A few years ago I moved across the country, leaving everything behind. I had a work from home job for a while, and I haven't really been able to connect with anyone. I never really did the online dating thing, but I downloaded Bumble For Friends to try and find some people to hang out with.
I am now painfully aware of what men go through when they're on dating sites, and it's obnoxious. There are like three girls total on this app. I mean, I know there are more, but you have three archetypes:
Weed Girl: Seems cool, but smokes weed and makes it her personality. Multiple references about gardening and smoking to make sure you don't miss the fact that she smokes weed. I don't condemn people who smoke, but I'm not in a job where I can smoke weed, and I don't want to go into my job smelling like I do. Next.
Club Girl: Likes bars, drinks, wine nights, clubbing, and going out. All her pics are from her regular Bumble or Tinder (assets out) and she's low-key looking for men on the friend finding app. If she's not posing in front of a mirror she's in a bar with a cluster of identical girls. Did I mention she likes to have fun and party? Next.
Fucking Becky: So inescapably bland that you don't even know if she's real. Likes hiking, the beach, books, working out, and coffee. Listens to: True Crime and Taylor Swift. Watching: Bridgerton or The Summer I Turned Pretty. I'm not shitting on people who like these things, I like Bridgerton, but please, just say one unique thing. Next.
That's it. Where are my alt girlies? My nerds? My goth baddies? My cottage core babes? Fellow gremlins? I don't want to hang out with Becky or weed girl, and parties are loud. I just want to meet someone down to earth who maybe shares one or two things in common with me. If this is what people are getting on their dating apps, no wonder everyone hates online dating so much.
This is all stupid and I hate making friends in adulthood because it's so hard to find anyone who seems interesting.
Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.