AITAH for not speaking to my mom after she made a "joke" about my past failures
I (30f) have recently decided to attend school after many years. For context, I worked in the same field for almost four years until my boss decided to close the business in January 2025. I don't have much work experience, a few jobs here and there, but nothing I truly enjoyed or wanted to stick with. So it wasn't that I was lazing around; I made sure to have a job, whether it was part-time or full-time. After losing my job, I made a promise to myself that if I didn't find a job within a few months, I would return to school. I signed up months back, but my first set of classes doesn't start until this month for summer courses. At one point, I thought I had finally found a job, but there was a lot of miscommunication from the head boss and others, and I decided not to take the job and focus on school.
For a little more background, I attended the local community college straight out of high school. I was still trying to figure out my major, and I wasn't fully prepared to be far from home. I'm the youngest and have never been from home like that. The plan was for me to take a few community college courses and then transfer to a full college when I was ready. Now, I admit that when attending the community college, I failed a class or two because I wasn't being serious. I still had that high school mentality and screwed up. I take full accountability for that happening. In the end, I decided to leave school and just focus on work since, at the time, I felt school wasn't right for me.
Now for the AITAH, my dad asked what classes I needed to take and if I was taking math. I'm fairly good in math, but I said: "No, because what I'm taking doesn't require a math course. Even if I did, I would get a credit because I passed my previous course with an A". My mom then proceeded to say, "Well, damn what happened with your other grades then". I didn't say a word. I just turned and walked away because if I said anything, it would've been a fight. She knows I feel bad enough not passing, and her bringing that back up just hurt. I've avoided talking about it for years because the guilt eats at me. I wasn't always the best student, but I've never failed a class before in my life, so that kind of broke my confidence a little when that happened.
My mom tends to bring up old things, good or bad, for some strange reason, knowing the bad things is what none of us want to rediscuss again. I've told her before that I felt like a failure among my siblings cause it took me so long to find my way in life, when it took my sisters no time at all. When she said that, I felt my emotions completely shut down and haven't said a word since. On one hand, I feel bad not speaking to her because we have an amazing relationship, but I also feel like I can't talk to her yet because I can't explain how I feel to her without her saying I have an "attitude". I'll probably delete after a while because she likes to read these stories now and then. I just really need an unbiased opinion. So AITAH?