I just don't understand why someone would do that? Was basically parked outside my house, only have a modest fiesta, get on just fine with my neighbours, live in a nice aear Alexandra park - but I woke up the yesterday morning, and someone had done a small incision above the handle. It wasn't super bad, seen worse - but why?
With burrata, oregano, parma ham, rocket & truffle pesto
I’m in a bit of a weird situation and not sure what to make of it.
My ex (27f) and I (28m) broke up just over 3 years ago. It wasn’t the cleanest breakup, we both had our issues at the time and weren’t the best versions of ourselves towards the end. I wouldn’t say I was perfect and I could be selfish at times, but I could say the same about her. It was one of those where we were just quite different and things just weren't working, and we both played a part in that. The break up was definitely traumatic, we lived together and she started dating someone seriously while we still shared the house, so it was definitely unpleasant at times.
Since then, we’ve both moved on. I’m in a new relationship now, and she was in one for a while too (they’ve since broken up). I hadn’t had any contact with her in years and honestly thought everything was just… done. I had no beef and I hadn't thought she would either.
We have a mutual friend (28f) who is getting married soon. She’s much closer to my ex than she is to me, but I was still invited. I wasn’t exactly excited about seeing my ex there, but I figured it would just be a bit awkward and we’d both be civil and keep our distance.
What I didn’t know until recently is that my ex gave our mutual an ultimatum – either uninvite me, or she’d end the friendship. Our mutual refused and basically said she wasn’t going to choose, and my ex followed through and cut her off.
The part that’s thrown me is I had no idea any of this was even happening until after they’d already stopped being friends. Now I feel weirdly stressed and involved in something I didn’t even know was going on.
Apparently my ex still feels really strongly about the relationship and has described it as “traumatising,” which honestly surprised me. I don’t see it that way at all. To me it was just a messy relationship where we both contributed to things not working. Some of the things she said were straight up lies, and the word "abusive" was thrown around, which I disagree with. I wasn't there during the conversation but I've been told that my ex struggled to pinpoint specific times I was abusive. I'm sure there were times I was a dick but I never mentally or physically abused her.
I guess I’m just confused about how it’s escalated to this point after so long, especially when we’ve both dated other people since.
Now I’m stuck wondering if I should still go to the wedding, and also just trying to process the fact that a friendship has ended over something involving me without me even being part of the conversation.
Has anyone dealt with something similar? Or have any perspective on why someone would still react this strongly after years?