My (24F) boyfriend’s (25M) family made a “joke” about another girl and now I can’t stop thinking about it
My boyfriend (25M) and I (24F) are in a long distance relationship (Netherlands/Canada). I try to visit him every 2 months and usually stay for around 3 weeks at a time. I know his family well, spend holidays with them, visit his grandparents when I’m there, etc. So it’s not like I’m some random online girlfriend they never see.
Yesterday my boyfriend went to a buffet with his parents, grandparents, aunt and uncle. Apparently his grandma saw a waitress and told him “that’s a nice girl.” Then his aunt agreed and said something like “yeah she’s nice.” My boyfriend immediately responded with “I’m already taken.”
Then his aunt said: “Oh yeah, I forgot she existed.”
And his grandma replied with: “Well, we barely see her.”
My boyfriend told me about this afterwards because he wanted to be honest with me. He did defend me immediately, which I appreciate a lot. But honestly the comments still really hurt me.
They apparently meant it as a joke, but I genuinely don’t see how it’s funny. I spend so much time, money and effort trying to be part of his life and family despite the distance. So hearing “I forgot she existed” feels incredibly disrespectful and dismissive.
Now I’m wondering if I’m overreacting for still being upset about it or if this would bother other people too?