2u2 positivity post
To the mom who is pregnant with their future 2u2 baby, browsing this subreddit and feeling utter dread. Let me tell you that in my experience it hasn’t been bad AT ALL and the things that have helped me personally.
Just a few facts about my family: my husband works Monday to Friday 7:30am to 5:30pm, and Saturdays from 12pm to 12am. Sunday he is home. I am a stay at home mom. My children are 4.5months old and 18.5mo (ish). Older daughter. Younger son. I have zero hired help, no daycare, and a limited budget so no eating out, no ordering in, no deliveries of any kind. Zilch. My house is a small, modest, 3bd 2bath. No giant yard, no play room, no large living room for the kids to race around in. We also have absolutely zero screen time. The tv is never on when the kids are awake. Not even when they are napping. Only after they are out for the night.
I have been TRULY, whole heartedly enjoying having both of my children at home since my youngest turned around 3 weeks old. The first two weeks were brutal because I had horrific baby blues and I couldn’t stop crying about everything and having panic attacks. But after that I honestly haven’t had a single bad day (bad moments, yes, but none that outweigh the good).
My daughter loves helping to throw the diapers away, fetch the pacifier, hold his bottle while he eats, etc. When I’m cooking and he starts crying in his swing she will run over there and entertain him with some soft toys that I have near him and then they’re both busy and I can finish cooking lunch or dinner or whatever. When I contact nap with my son, I hold him in a little recliner I have in his room and let him nap on me while I rock. My daughter will play by herself in the living room and bring things to show me or get help with here and there. She will do this usually for about the hour it takes him to nap. My son is also totally content to chill in the bouncer or in tummy time while I play with my daughter.
Things that have made my life TREMENDOUSLY easier:
encourage independent play BEFORE baby is born so your oldest can play around while you nurse/bottle feed/contact nap.
100000% baby proof your living room. Literally make it impossible for you toddler to get hurt. It will be life giving to be able to go change a diaper in the bathroom or hold baby for nap or nurse without needing to jump out of your seat to intervene.
if you’re comfortable. Sleep train your oldest and then eventually your youngest. Being able to put my daughter down in her crib wide awake for bed and naps is soooo easy. I will literally set my son down in the bouncer, change my daughter’s diaper, sing her a lullaby and but her down (whole process 5mins) and then that’s it. Now that my son is sleep trained for nights (not naps yet) putting them both down is a breeze. The 2 weeks of sleep regression around 3.5mo were definitely harder but you just push through! My son goes down earlier so my daughter helps with the bath, then watches as I change his diaper and put him down. Then my husband does her bath and bed while I cook dinner. Then we clean up the house for the night together. Workout. And just watch tv and snack.
get comfortable with a little crying. Sometimes while I’m getting my daughter set for lunch my son cries because he wants to be held. Sometimes when I’m changing my son’s diaper my daughter cries because she wants me to read a book. It’s totally fine! I finish what I’m doing and then meet the other need. At the end of the day, my daughter gets her book, and my son gets held. Crying does not equal crisis or urgency.
You have got this!