u/Imaginary_Winter_961

I cannot STAND when people advise others on here to “just pretend” to be lds around their TBM family. I know every family is different but I cannot imagine a situation where this makes ANY sense. Why are we sacrificing ourselves for the comfort of others?? For grown ass adults? Why are we completely throwing everything we know and believe out the window to appease our boomer parents!? They need to be uncomfortable in their beliefs. they need to see that the church does not work for everyone! They need to see that people can still be good and the same person they’ve always been when they’ve left the church. Short term, it is easier to just lie and put on a front but in the long run you are only doing yourself a disservice. Why would you spend the rest of your life out of alignment with yourself so someone else can be comfortable? Speak your truth! Ask questions! Be vulnerable! My family and my in laws are as Mormon as you can get and it harmed our relationship for a while but we came out on the other side stronger than ever! We have much more open and honest conversations. They realized that we are still good people! That our lives haven’t completely downward spiraled like they thought it would! That our children still have amazing lives and that have values and morals! They NEED to see and understand these things. Trust me, I know it’s so hard but you know what else is hard? Lying to yourself. The one person in the world who you have forever. I would rather spend my one precious shot at life disappointing others than myself. If you see this, this is your sign to SPEAK YOUR TRUTH!! You will have the rest of your life to be free and live on your own terms. The church has already taken so much of your life so don’t let it take anymore!!!!!

Edit: if you are getting abused or a teen with abusive parents then this post is obviously not for you. That is a very small group though, if you are an adult who is lying to your parents or especially your PARTNER then this is for you! I know everyone is on their own timeline but if you are looking for a sign then this is it! If you are lying to your spouse, I am BEGGING you to come clean. A relationship cannot stand if it is built on lies. You and your partner deserve honesty. That is the bare minimum in a relationship.

My mom only homeschooled me from 2nd-3rd grade (thank heavens). My mom would read a book to us for 30 minutes and then we would read our own book for 30 minutes. After that we would dig holes in the backyard for “science”. I would wait patiently until 3pm for the neighbors to get home from school so I could play with them. When they got home they usually had plans with friends they met from school. One time I was invited to hang out with them but they just talked about other people at school who I didn’t know and said so many terms I didn’t understand. When I went back to school in 4th grade I had SEVERE anxiety and was terrified of getting called to the principals office. I once spilled water outside and asked my teacher if I could go back outside and clean it up because I was scared it would freeze over and someone would fall on it and I would get called to the principals office. By the end of the school year I was able to adjust and wasn’t terrified of authority but it was a rough start! I will never homeschool my kids.