u/IndependenceOk8695

for context, all of us work full time. we have two small kids- a 6 yo and a 1.5 yo. my husband drops off the kids at school in the morning but all the rest is up to my parents. my dad picks them up, my mom feeds them/gives them baths, etc until I show up after work which is usually around 6 Pm. she then makes sure that my husband and I and the kids have an adequate dinner and most days even sends breakfast for the next day.

our oldest kids birthday is coming up. my husband mentioned that maybe we could go to Disneyland but he only wants him, me and the oldest to go. he would rather have my parents babysit the baby and explicitly said he doesnt want my parents to come because we should be spending time as a family (just the three of us). I got very mad at this.

first of all- I don’t think we are going to end up going because of our work schedules but also- my parents do SO MUCH- the very least he could do is offer for them to come along with us (my parents would insist on paying for themselves- they’ve never asked for anything in return for all the help they give us and does not expect anything) however I feel like my husband is very unappreciative and only wants to get but does not give. last time he bought my mom perfume for my birthday was 3 years and and last gift he got my dad (a t-shirt) was 1 year ago. he doesn’t help them out in any other way and even being courteous and greeting them or saying goodbye when departing seems to be too much for him. AIO?

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u/IndependenceOk8695 — 16 days ago
▲ 22 r/Advice

My husband and I have been married for 7 years. it dawned on me today after yet another argument and crying session alone that I am completely alone in this marriage. if my feelings are hurt- it’s my fault. if I’m crying it’s because of my mental health issues. if I react, I need therapy. and I’m not making myself a saint- but ive never hurt anyone intentionally. if anything, ive shown more empathy than he ever has. and I continue to do so and I continue to get hurt. he doesn’t lie or cheat or gamble or get drunk. I feel terrible even admitting how unhappy I am in this marriage because he’s not a bad person. he’s just very aloof and shifts all the blame on me. we have two small children. I can’t leave. but sometimes I wish I could- I’d take the kids with me. I feel so bad even saying that. but sometimes his words and his actions are so detached and aloof. he says he’ll never change. he says I shouldnt have any expectations of him. so I guess I’m along to figure this one out. is this a normal part of marriage?

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u/IndependenceOk8695 — 16 days ago