u/Inevitable_Walrus393

so basically me and this guy austin were friends for a short time. there’s this other guy alex who i’ve had issues with. there’s also james who is a guy i used to talk to romantically but it didn’t work out. 

the reason me and alex fought in the first place is because he went and told austin that i was talking shit about him, which i wasn’t, and that caused problems. me and austin already had a rocky history because he lied to me a lot. he would tell me that people didn’t like me and when i’d ask questions about it and say i heard this or that, he would find out and then go lie to those people and make up more lies about things i never said. also he was upset that james didn’t want to be his friend and somehow blamed that on me? why would my talking stage wanna be ur friend, that’s so weird to even be upset about.

also our friendship ended cause austin blocked me because i was just fed up with him at that point, i was just exhausted by the whole dynamic and we weren’t even friends for that long.

about a week passes and i find out that alex found out about james through a gc he was in with me and other friends, he specifically went to austin to ask for james’s @ because he knew austin would have it since me and austin were friends during the time me and james talked. austin just handed it over, no questions asked, knowing damn well that alex is weird. mind u me and austin weren’t even on speaking terms at this point, so why are you even getting involved in my business? what makes it so much worse is that we were actually friends and I defended him constantly.

when i found out i was pissed and went to text austin about it. he kept deflecting the whole time saying “he asked me” and “i don’t owe you anything” like okay but just because someone asks you for something doesn’t mean you hand it over especially when you know they have bad intentions. he never once just said yeah that was wrong of me, instead he kept trying to flip it on me, calling me fake, saying i talk shit too, doing everything except taking accountability.

then out of nowhere he started telling me to get a job, get a life, get hoes? like what does that have to do with anything? it had nothing to do with the situation, it was just random personal attacks because he had nothing real to say back. which honestly just proved even more that he knew he couldn’t win on the actual topic

i’ll admit i got mean, i called him some names but the constant deflecting and justifying himself genuinely drove me crazy because he knew what he did was wrong and the whole innocent fake like you don’t get to do something shady to someone who always had your back and then act confused when they’re upset about it. to top it all off james ended up texting me saying i was sending people to text him when i literally did not, that was all alex retaliating for no reason cause we don't even talk too. mind u theyre grown men getting involved in a girls business

so aita for saying that he’s a snake for acting innocent

basically me and this guy (pete) were friends for a short time, but we fell out because someone else (alex) around telling him I was talking shit about him when I wasn’t. I apologized for everything escalating and we made up. however the next day he blocked me just because I didn’t reply fast enough, then started calling me fake to other people while I was blocked. I was honestly just exhausted by the whole thing.

today, I found out alex asked pete for j’s (this guy i used to talk to) @ and he gave it to him knowing me and j had history. what upset me was that I always defended him when we were friends, so it felt shady as hell for him to involve himself in something that had nothing to do with him when he could’ve just told alex no.

when I confronted him, i was being a bit mean i won’t lie. i was calling him weird and saying why would he give alex that. he kept deflecting with “he asked me” and “I don’t owe you anything” instead of just admitting it was weird. then he started throwing random insults at me like telling me to get a job/get hoes instead of actually addressing the issue. which i got upset with this so I’ll admit I got mean back, but the constant deflecting pissed me off because he knew why I was upset and said we weren’t friends so why should he care.

the worst part is J later texted me telling me to stop sending people after him when it was literally alex and the pete’s doing. i’m just upset that im being painted as obsessed over something i wasn’t even a part of. and i proceeded to text pete again telling him if he wants to do shady shit to not blame it on other people. which he said that we’re not friends so it got nothin to do with him but he’s BEEN SHADY towards me and even yelled at me sometimes

was i an asshole about this but it genuinely upset me that he was telling people about MY business?

hiii!! i need some advice on a situation with a friend because i’m honestly feeling really weird about it

i was ranting to him about how someone made me feel about my looks. which he started ranking me compared to his other friends and said they were like 9s and “bad” while i was a “solid 7” and could be an 8 with makeup and lash extensions . he also pointed out things about my facial features that men might not like about me and went on about how men have “types,” which wasn’t what i needed at all

what’s confusing is that he usually calls me beautiful, but then turned around and compared me to other girls who are his friends as well or people he’s been romantically involved with which he ranked me lower

this also isn’t the first time he’s said things that upset me. he’s told me his friends don’t like me because i’m an “outsider” even though i’ve never met them , and he makes comments about how i’m not seen as “bad” (sexy) to men. he also has a habit of lying about small, unnecessary things, and sometimes when he apologizes it comes across as a bit condescending, which makes it harder for me to take it seriously

also he does call me sensitive as well because i get upset with his comments regarding my voice (he asked if i forced it cause it’s high pitched????????) and my appearance

i did tell him that what he said made me feel worse and that i didn’t like being compared, and he apologized after i brought it up. but even with the apology, i still feel uncomfortable and i don’t feel good talking to him anymore since he views me this way

i guess i’m just wondering if i’m overreacting or if this is actually a red flag, and what i should do moving forward?

hiii!! so i was ranting to my friend about how someone made me feel which was about my looks. and to make me feel better he started ranking me on a scale compared to his other friends. he said his other friends were like 9s and “bad” but that i was a solid 7 and if i wore more makeup i’d be an 8. and he als pointed out little things that men might not like about me which… hahha then he went on about how men have certain types but that wasn’t even what i was asking for 😭.

what confused me is that this same friend always calls me beautiful, but then turned around and compared me to other girls which just felt weird to me. also this friend has expressed to me before that he wants to try maybe seeing if a relationship can happen between us which i’ve expressed as right now i don’t want one (which he compared me to the girl he previously had something with and the other who was his best friend).

i texted him about it telling him how i didn’t like that he did that and now i want to block him despite him apologizing. he’s constantly saying things and apologizing cause i get upset and ignore him for days , however some of these things can be pretty harsh like saying how his friends don’t like me because im an “outsider” (never met them nor talked to them), and constantly saying that im not portrayed as “bad” to men

am i the asshole for wanting him to apologize for what he said?