u/Initial-Economy-1400

So this about strange dreams, a radio, growing up and a girl who seems to have supernatural effects on the world

Okay so im gonna juat write this out like little story, but basically Ive recently started a new job and I dont have good feeling about it even though its easy and the people are okay. Every night ive gone to sleep for it my body gets put into fight mode and I just can't sleep and im left feeling groggy and really pissed off.

Then last night I decided to really take it chill, after being really mad and upset about work left me feeling and how tired I was, so I went on a little walk round the river after my dinner, watched movie, and cleared my room to read before bed. The second I lay down I got racing thoughts and im back into fight mode im really pumped up and adrenaline is going. Its weird though I checked my heart rate and it was only 52bpm.

So I eventually got to sleep and im in and out these really weird dreams, when all of a sudden glowing orange in me or a dark space im not sure if im dreaming or my room is glowing orange, but im woken up by what sounds like running water. I live with my grandmother and im worried she left the sink running but im confused because its also about 2am.

At this point the fight mode is still engaged like it never wore of I just sleot with it on. I got up to go check the bathroom hasn't flooded and im confused more that the sink isn't actually running. But the niose I can still hear it and its coming from my own room and now I assume its the raddiator but it shouldnt do that. Thats when I turn on the lights and see the radio next to my bed, well the sound was coming from there. This is also whats kinda odd its a battery powered radio were the power switch is in the volume wheel. The batterys in this are dead as I couldn't get it going before, and the volume wheel had been cranked all the way to the top.

Im quitting this job its no good for me and for how strange last night is I could only corelate it dream I had before as it alot of things have a familar feeling. This would be the orange glow, darkness and thoughts/dreams of the past. So about 5 years ago I had this dream where I woke up on a beach and this girl helps me up and asks me to follow her, she keeps calling my name and I only ever see the back of her though she is familar as I know her. She calls me through different areas of a place and I stop to think how cool it would be if my friends were here.

Eventually she calls me into a hotel and theres a corridoor full of rooms and theres 2 down the end. 1 open glowing with light shes calling me to go in there, another shut glooming with darkness. I walk down the to these doors I look in the one full of light and the girl says are you coming in Ive been waiting for you. I turn to look at the other one thats gloomy it has past written on it. She still calling me, so I say yh ill be in I just hve to do something. So I open the gloomy door and get sucked into it like a black hole.

All around me is darkness I see nothing its like im stuck in a void, mentally I feeo different from who I am in the other place. Back in the other place I feel good, whole, calm and grown. In the void I mentally feel younger as if Im a child, scared, alone, helpless and lost. After feeling despair for a little while my friends come to me but as ghosts, they tell me you need to do everything that youve told us to do, this can only be do alone but you will be okay, you guided us now we can guide you. There present was strange in the void they feel olde, more aware, and trusting similar to how I felt my self back in the other place. Then they all hug me and say we will see you there as they disappeared. this a very hard moment for me I didnt want them to leave I felt scared and alone.

Now alone in the void feeling im stuck and got nothing, a familar voice calls my name and shines a light acriss the void, its the girl, I have to get up and start making my way to her and thats it that was my dream. But in terms of whats happened lately and the dream theres alot of similarities.

Currently in my waking life I feel pretty good and normal I try to keep on top of myself, but ive gotten down alot with some things. Ive struggled with doing a degree and that was a shot for me, then I had been out if work for a while and ive struggled with finding jobs and making good terms with one. My social life is increasingly active but also very quite at times and its been hard, alot of my bros are starting relationships and having babies now, so im still hanging out alot but not spending as much to time with them as they are all spending more time with there partners now or looking for partners rather than wanting to hang out.

Meanwhile I can help but feel like no matter what I doive not grown up and when I try the presence of the child remains, its really weird because for a good while I felt really good for myself and what I was doing I felt grown and like a man, but lately ive been having the feeling likr im a child and still a boy, and the man within me is crying to express himself. Strangely ive been having loads of involuntry thoughts about my past along with dreams and the more they come the less im choosing to ignore them and just kinda let them go so I dont anchor my present feelings to how things in the past made me feel.

With my room glowing orange it very much reminded of the place I was in during my dream and it reminded me of the girl from the dream. As for the radio I really cant tell but it felt like it was pulling me out of this job ive bee n dreading. It really broke up my inner feelings in the moment as it began to buzz.

I dont wanna get head over heals but theres a girl who lives near me, in someways its like this girl has suoernatural powers, I know her and we used talk but only ever see her from behind now, sometimes I get curios enough to try chase her up but when I do shes never there and when I do it seems to lead to overly positive outcomes where I end up on these small one man adventures. Ill give some examples I got into college through her wich seems kinda odd, but Id been on a walk with her one morning and she had to split rather soon and it ended up with me taking social science classes and eventually a degree. Another time I got bummed out about not seeing my friends for a while so I was gonna go running or bike up the woods and I had seen her going running when I left my house and I just horny brain moment I thought damnn shes pretty so I should go talk to her, by time I road to where she ran she just disappeared and I ended up on a 10 mile scenic ride down the river and to pub which I showed a photo of to my friends and it lead to a big reunion with them.

Someother strange events with this girl have been that she has an influence within my life that I cant even control myself. Its super strange when we were a bit younger me and my friend went shopping and upon walking home we bumped into her and I was gonna try speak to her, she gave me some kinda stare and its as if my mouth just got vaccum sealed and it was impossible to open it somewhat felt as though I had matured as a person in a matter of seconds like I really couldnt fight what was happening. Another time was when I first tried speaking to her we both looked eachother in the eyes and the feeling was unreal like it genuilly felt like I had just been struck by lightning and my body was being eltricfied, and another one was one day I wanted to chase her up before I had training and upon training I do bjj it felt like I had superhuman reflexes and strength.

I can only correlate this girl who lives near me with this dreams because of all the crazy shit that happens when I see her or try speek to her. Other than ive no over speculations to her being as its near impossible to speak to her.

So yh thats a mix of maddness from my life with strange dreams, growing up and women with super natural powers plus a self powered radio. After writing it all im kinda confused to why I wanted to share it to be honest.