u/Jaedan0

Together 2 years, engaged 6 months. Very happy and healthy relationship until she broke up with me one random afternoon.

The breakup was very cold hearted and honestly cruel on her end. Everybody involved didn’t understand, her own mother told me I didn’t do anything wrong and she didn’t understand. I tried my best to talk to her about it and work on things, the more I tried the worse it got. In the end she got pretty nasty, said and did a lot of bad shit. My last interaction with her before the next segment, she said she didn’t love me anymore (although in a fit of rage) so that was it from me. I removed her from my life and got back to working on myself.

After a month of silence, she called the other night and wanted to give something back. She came over, after acting coy she started talking. She admitted that she was the problem the whole time and she was wrong, that she misses me so much and wants me in her life again as friends.

We’ve interacted a bit since, I gave her a lift once and she’s came up to me at college and talked, mostly just compliments. My plan is to simply keep to myself and bide my time over the next month, see if she just misses my treatment or if she genuinely makes efforts to fix things.

I dunno, I’m trying to be a good man yet protect my peace. I believe most people deserve **2nd** chances, and people can change. I certainly have. And although it doesn’t excuse her actions, she’s still a very traumatised girl who didn’t have it easy growing up. There’s some love for her still, but all trust is gone. So if her goal was to get back with me, it would take some serious effort and time for that to even be a possibility.

I don’t have it in me to hate her, let alone most people. Nor do I hold a grudge, but I still acknowledge what she’s done.

Me (23), fiancée (22)

I wont go into detail on why we split after 9 months of engagement, but the breakup was very hurtful and cruel on her end. I kept heartfelt letters and paintings from her because despite her treatment, they meant everything to me, and throughout the breakup she still told me she loved me.

However, after her trying to return things I made her, her saying that she wasnt sure what she would do with my letters, and after saying although in a fit of rage, that she doesn't love me anymore, I felt I needed to get rid of them, as I didnt expect for her to return. So I burned them, not in malice, but to let go.

She called me last night, she came over and we talked about some things, she admitted that she was the problem and that she wants me in her life again, just as friends.

I know the day will come where she will ask. And I feel so much regret and guilt, she put so much love and time into those paintings and letters, but at the time, all I had to work with was that she didnt love me anymore, she tried to get rid of my gifts, and that we'd never be in each others lives again, so I had to do what I thought I needed to to move on.

Even still, I still regret it, I cry over it, sounds so silly but those gifts of hers really do mean everything to me. And I know that when I have to tell her, she wont take it well.

In my head though, new letters can be written. Losing a relationship over a understandable mistake isnt worth it.