u/Jiokeki

Its so hard for me to find a dermatologist, Ive treated an infection on the back of my neck with oral antibiotics, and it went away.
But maybe a few months later it came back, and turned weeping. Its a rough few months and it’s very mild and it doesn’t hurt much, but I have medical anxiety and I have such a hard time finding an available dermatologist!! There’s a bump on the back of my neck, filled with clear fluid, no scent and it just scares me because of how long it’s been.. what can I do to soothe it while I search?

Anxiety gives me the worst physical symptoms
I cant sleep, I cant eat, I touch parts of my body then think about sepsis, I think about anything and it develops into fear
Every pain in my body is cancer and every bump, or spot redder than usual means I’m going to die terribly
Im scared of doctors, so I havent seen one in years
I barely even take care of myself and I just have myself to blame

When I went through depression, I wanted death so much it was euphoric
It gave me acceptance and this relaxed feeling that the end is a good thing

Got over depression, now I’m dominantly anxious and slightly depressed so I got the worst of both worlds lmao
Still thinking I have cancer right now..

Edit: A few people are right about not comparing it but also I’m talking about MY years of severe depression vs my years of severe anxiety. You have never experienced MY depression or MY anxiety. The same way I can’t decide which one is better or worse, you CANT decide which of MY own experiences is better or worse than the other. This post is a vent, not a statement or a revelation.

(you are free to share your own opinions, and experiences!! im just talking about just in case there are people think they can decide my own opinion for me.)

I have about 5 digital artworks and five traditional. The traditional is fine, however, for digital, NO printing services ive found had gotten the right colors. Everything is off by a large margin, usually makes my digital artworks look very very dark where you have to squint to see it, sometimes it’s extremely desaturated. Ive printed at home, printed outside…

No idea what’s happening…
Does anyone else have this issue too?

I saw someone brought their laptop to show certain digital artworks, could I do that too?