u/Justinestar

hi everyone, so quick context.
i live with my boyfriend whom i am married to in his religion, and his brother’s girlfriend is also married the same way, so we are technically not legally married.
i just moved in with him in January, and his brother’s girl has lived here about a year before that. The reason why i’m here is because we were long distance and i transferred to UCSD, which is nearby his house.
long story short, ever since i met his brother’s gf, she has never acknowledged me, she never tries to talk to me, and i’ve always been the one to reach out to her because i genuinely want to get to know her, and i also feel like its respectful considering it isnt our home in the first place. No matter how many times i try to talk to her, she would shut me down or not look me in the face. With everyone else, she takes the lead and introduces herself to everyone, puts in the work to talk to everyone, but me. She’s also passive, and she would make comments that would try to put me down. I wish i had someone to run to and just talk to and relate with. It really messes with my mind. I want to leave, but i have school and i just feel like i cant, and i feel like i can continue to invest into myself under my boyfriend’s roof because im honestly grateful that i pay only $300 in rent and theres always food on the table. I just dont know what to do to really establish the boundary of honoring my raw energy, and just letting go and just staying on my lane. I’ve always had the heart to bring people together, but i feel empty this time.… im starting to feel resentful and not seen. I talked to my bf about it multiple times and he doesn’t accommodate how i feel but rather denies it whenever i open up about it and i just keep to myself cuz its just silent abuse and im just so misunderstood and i wish i got to spill everything out without being judged, but rather heard and felt. I want to cut myself off and protect my peace. The only thing i feel like that stops me would be that i just want his parents to be happy. Its uncomfortable having a divided household. But i guess the ball is not in my court to fix, it may never be fixed. This dynamic is so shitty because it makes me anxious. And im not even at fault. It makes my heart feel weak.