u/Kikopho

I had decided to walk away from some of my closest and longest friends I have. I had known these folks for over 25 years, since I was able to walk. We grew up on the same neighborhood. We all were poor, but we had each other. I grew up on the notion of brotherhood.

I am still healing from some of these folks that I used to call friends. I still have trust issues and don’t display the true me to people anymore. I have to put up an individual barrier to protect myself.

I was the weakest, smallest, and youngest in the group. When we would hangout as kids, they would ignored me often. Even as an adult, I am still being ignored. I grew up feeling that I didn’t have a voice. One of the guys in the group would pick on another guy besides myself. For me, he would say really mean things and these comments were personal attacks. Making fun of my intelligence and other things.

It’s sad that it took me this long to realized that some of my closest friends were also some of the reasons why I have trust issues and other things. Looking back, i can tell that the brotherhood I thought as a child and even as an adult was more of a toxic relationship than a real friendship.

It’s crazy because the saying “ keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer “ isn’t always true, when it was my own friends who were the real enemies. Out of everybody out of the group, I actually did hangout with him on a daily basis. However, when the dust had lifted. It turns out he was one of my closest friend, but also he very toxic and a bully to me and to some of the guys. I had suffer a lot from this specific friends. Looking back, I don’t know why I was still friends with them.

Over the last few years I started reevaluating a lot of my friends. I have come to terms that some of them were jealous of each other success. Others were very selfish in terms of using people when it only benefited themselves. It makes me realized most of these guys were not there for me during the plus 25 years I have known them. I spent most of my time investing and helping them when these so called friends wouldn’t help me out if I even ask for a small flavor. I stood up to one of the guys from the group was and is a bully. He doesn’t like it, but I don’t take shitt from him. I have grown very tired of him. Ironically is that this guy is one of my closest friends. He is and was a good friend, but also he was a bully, a narcissist. He would put people down because he was insecure and since I was weakest out of the group he felt more comfortable picking on me. Even as an adult till I gave him back some of the same energy.

Some of them are now dads. I am uncle Erick to them. But I won’t be in their lives. Being friends with these people for so many years has done negative things to me.i had learned from some of these people that being nice and kind is a sign of weakness. I have trust issues from them and from other things. The true me is someone who is caring and kind. However, I learned that you sometimes need to put on a mask. These people took advantage of my kindness.

I am still healing but looking forward for the future. I am less native now and choose wisely on the company I keep. I still do my best to let my kindness shine, and not be paranoid. I still sometimes close myself off because I am afraid of being hurt and vulnerable. But I enjoy volunteering and I don’t have to put up a mask here. I feel loved and appreciated.

I was wondering how people balance marathon training with other physical activities like MMA.

I have two marathons under my belt and would like to run one in the next three months. However, I still want to do my MMA classes. I go about three to four times a week. On two of the days, I do two classes back-to-back. I do BBJ, boxing, and Muay Thai. I know I would need to modify my strength training schedule as well.

My biggest issues, I would say, are just time to fit everything in and recovery.

Hello, y'all. I hope everyone is enjoying their summer. I was dealing with a lot of anxiety and uncertainty this summer.

I was a first-year teacher last year. I wasn't renewed. But I am glad that I found this amazing book at Target. The book is called “Thank You, Teachers: True Stories From America’s Teachers, Our Last Line of Defense and Our First Line of Hope” by James Patterson and Matt Eversmann.

I love the stories in the book; there are a lot of inspiring, uplifting, and relatable stories. Some are tragic. For the first time in a while, I didn't feel alone.

Warning: some stories include murder, illegal actions, 🍇. The book includes teachers’ experiences and short stories.

I highly recommend this book, especially given the current state of teaching and the climate. I hope you all know that you are doing heavenly work. Thank you for all that you do, the sacrifices, the tears, the blood, and the countless hours of patience.

I am trying to meet ladies who are around my age. I am in my early 30s and look very young.

I enjoy going to tea and coffee spots to do work and relax. I used to do a lot of hiking, running, and sports. At the moment, I enjoy going to car events like low-rider, JDM, and classic events. I started going to music events every week. I also do Martial Arts.

Hello, I am new to this sub. I have been doing BJJ for about a month. I am currently going to a no-Gi class at a new gym/Doji.

How do I survive the heavier and stronger people here? I am the smallest guy in the class. I really tried my best to work on my defense, but I feel that the skill gap is huge, and the strength difference is there.

At the moment, I don't know how to apply any chokes or locks correctly. I know how to get out of a few chokes and locks, but I get dumped on when they use their weight and strength.

Is it worth it on paying for 1 on 1 coaching session for boxing and Muay Thai?

I feel like I could better greatly benefit from getting extra practice.

At my current gym/dojo I recently started doing Muay Thai. Before that I had about three weeks of Muay Thai experience and a month of MMA besides boxing. I’m not good with blocking kicks.

During our last sparing session I spared against one of the best fighters and another person who was a heavy weight. Again, I’m short and weigh like a feather. During the two sparing season that day I got destroyed.

I don’t know if I did wrong by trying to survive and instead of practicing the drills we were doing. I felt very underwhelmed.

One session I was getting punches with heavy on them. I was scared for my life even if he was going 30 percent of his full force. The other session I was getting my butt whoop by a skilled fighter. I kind learned how to defend certain kicks. I ate a lot of teep and side kicks from him. I was afraid of getting kicked cleanly from not blocking it in time. He landed a lot of beautiful kicks on me. One of the kicks that he landed on me almost took me out. I thought he was throwing a body kick but threw a high kick and my face was wide out. He instantly apologized but I was scared as shift inside. I just saw my life flashed before my eyes. It was the longest two minutes of my life. The kicks kept on coming…

My question is, how tight do your punches need to be? I’m learning boxing, and my guard is tight, elbows to my sides, punches like hooks, and upper-cuts are short and tight. I’m not saying that I’m throwing perfectly, but these are the things that I am focusing on.

I have short arms and have run into situations where my punches and combos are short. I know that I need to step into my punches more and work on getting to the right distance. However, I’m reflecting that I can throw longer hooks and upper-cuts depending on the range I’m in.

Hello, I did two marathons over the last two years. I’m trying to get my third one this year. I’m trying to get to the 3-hour mark. My PR record was 4 hours and 29 seconds.

My last running schedule was at my peak, running 70 miles a week, one or two days of hard running. I was heavily focused on the running zones and heartbeats. I would do one longer run every two weeks and would increase the mileage. At some point, I was running ten miles a day.

I used the gel fuel, along with honey.

What type of running schedules, programs, and training has worked best for you guys who have gotten under the 4-hour mark? I had been slowly adding strength training to my legs and lower back.

I know I can beat the four-hour mark this time, however, I really want to hit under the 3:30-hour mark and hopefully under the 3 hour mark in the near future.

Aitte fam! I need your help, after 300 years of doing nothing. I’m ready to hit the dating scene.

Yesterday I was at music event and I noticed a beautiful lady who was with two other friends. I was enjoying the music while glancing over to her when we made eye contact.

I did nothing afterward. I enjoyed the music and left. I’m trying to get out of my comfort zone and make moves.

How do I approach someone who is in a group? I do enjoy talking to people, however I don’t have any game. Please help me out fam!

I have 3 months of
Boxing and two months of MMA training. I still don’t know what type of fighter i’m. I
Am a short fighter, slow, and like to pressure people. I don’t have great defensive and don’t have the killer instincts to be aggressive.

Most of the people I train or spare with are heavier, longer and bigger.

I tend to have an issue of throwing combos and measuring my distance.

I would say that my style is a poor Temu version of Issac Cruz (Pit Bull). I tend to have a high guard and try my best to throw combos. I try my best to move constantly because I can’t trade blows with these bigger people. I do add angles and counter-punches.

Any tips or suggestions would be helpful. Thank you