I’m going to try to keep this short. I started this job in 2019 at the age of 24. I’m now 32 and still here, though I was promoted once. I never expected I’d still be here after the age of 30, but covid changed my plans.
My boss is a stress monster. She is addicted to work, logs in every weekend and even when she’s on PTO constantly. Her emotions are very difficult not to take on. I’m getting better at it, but when she treats every single thing as an emergency and doesn’t understand the concept of prioritizing, working for her is exhausting.
Last year she mentioned to me in passing that she plans to retire in 11 years and that it would be awesome if we could keep the same team until then because the three of us work so well together. I agreed that would be nice.
The problem is, after that conversation, she has now gotten the idea in her head that I “promised” to stay until she retires, which is now ten years down the line. She reminds me of my “promise” often.
Since then, there have been huge company restructurings. Everyone at the top has been replaced in the last year and no one is happy with the changes they are implementing. On top of that, the government is decided we need to do 6 audits this year. For reference, we typically do one and it takes up all of our time and energy. We’ve done one and a half so far and I’m already so burnt out. A lot of that has to do with my boss and her constant complaining and catastrophizing. She can’t see for shit so I’m constantly on calls with her acting as her eyes, though she won’t admit that’s what’s happening.
I think because she expects me to stay so long, she’s comfortable putting more and more on my plate. So far it’s nothing I can’t handle, but we’re already doing 6 times the work this year for no pay increase and I make the least out of anyone in the department because I started out as the assistant to the director. She gives me more and more of her job all the time. She even had me return one of her phone calls yesterday. I’ve not been an assistant for five years and I was never ***her*** assistant. It felt weird and inappropriate.
I really want to make it clear to my boss that I won’t be staying for more than two years. June 2028, at the absolute latest. I’ll be 34 by then, and I really want to be in a field more in line with my interests and passions. I intend to stay until all six audits are done, a yearish, at the absolute least, but I need some kind of reprieve if I’m to make it that long.
Should I wait until we’re between audits (if possible) to tell her? Should I tell her at all? I feel like I need to tell her so she isn’t blindsided when it happens and so (hopefully) she’ll stop relying on me to do more and more of her job for her as the years go on.
I could write a novel about how stressful it is to work for her, how resentful I am, and how totally taken advantage of I feel. I like her very much as a person but as my boss, it’s awful. I appreciate any advice!