I have a coworker who has epilepsy. They have seizures a few times a month. About 3 months ago they had a seizure while driving to work and totaled their car. They also got their license suspended.
They’ve been relying mostly on coworkers for rides to and from work saying that Uber costs too much. And apparently they don’t have any other ride options.
This person asks me for a ride about 2-4 times a week. Sometimes when we work similar shifts and sometimes on my day off.
Sometimes I tell them I can’t, even when I can. I try to be a kind and helpful person, especially given the rough circumstance they’re in, so I’ve been willing to help but I’m about at my limit..
they never offer me gas money and I had to start asking for it. It turns my 5 minute drive into a 30+ minute drive.
I don’t know how to tell my coworker that they can’t rely this heavily/consistently on me for rides. I’m happy to help in emergency situations but I feel like I’ve become the free taxi.
I know I owe them nothing and that’s it’s ok to tell them that I can’t help them anymore but I don’t know how.. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.
EDIT: First off, thank you to every who left a response, I really appreciate everyone’s feedback. Quick update: they asked me for a ride again today and said they would pay me $10 for gas. After arriving to work and reminding them to send me the cash, I still haven’t received anything. I’ve decided to tell them I’m willing to help through the rest of May so they have some time to figure out what their next move is but I will no longer be willing to give them rides after that. Stay excellent, everyone.
EDIT 2: I seriously can’t thank you all enough. When I made this post I was not expecting to receive this much feedback. After thinking about it a lot over the last 12 ish hours, and coming to the realization that we don’t work together for the rest of the week and I’m out of town most of next week, I’ve just decided to tell them no more rides. For anyone curious how I decided to go about it, here’s the message I sent them.
“Hey _____. I’m really sorry but I won’t be able to help with rides anymore. I don’t expect a reward but I feel like I shouldn’t have to ask for compensation. What I thought would be a few rides has turned into a regular thing and after a few months the time and money it’s costing me to help you is really adding up. You’re one of my favorite coworkers and I want you to know that we’re totally cool but I won’t be helping with rides anymore. I hope you understand 🤙 “
No BS, lies, or beating around the bush. I tried to be direct, keep it real, and remain kind. Thanks again you guys.