u/Legendre_Poly53

Hey, I’m 22F, recently diagnosed BP2 after pending for about 6 months, and I don’t know how I will go on with my life long term or how to cope.

It was wonderful to finally have a diagnosis that seemed right. Previously I was diagnosed major depressive and I always felt much worse and nuanced than what forums/Google described.

Some things, I identify as nonbinary, go by they/them but for a while have been having gender issues because I think for years I’ve just had internalized misogyny and also being autistic + bipolar made me feel less like a woman. I just completed my fourth year of college pursuing a Physics BS. but I have one more to go due to this past year being rough and experiencing debilitating hypomania and depression.

I work two jobs and have seem to be unable to do either of them. I work at a coffee shop once a week during the semester (now for summer i dont) and as an intern researcher at an air force base lab 20 hours a week that I leave early or dont go in most of the time.

This is detrimental for my finances as I live with my partner who works a serving job. We struggle financially. Neither of us can get help from our parents.

How do I even live life? Does that make sense? Completing school and actually being able to work doesn’t even seem possible. What should I tell my work at the labs? I want to at least never return to the coffee shop, but they already accommodate my schedule well. It would not be so bad if I could ask them to never have me interact with customers, but I haven’t brought that up.

Also i have accommodations at school but they don’t seem like they’re enough. I also don’t have many friends, and the ones i do have are not understanding. Like my friend for 8 years literally asked me if depression/mania is triggered by lifestyle and if i changed my lifestyle it would fix it. I have one newer prospective friend who I think would understand, but i haven’t told her yet.

I officially got diagnosed with yesterday (Bipolar II). Last semester, when I was going through a manic episode, I had the most compassionate professor notice I was struggling. I went to him about dropping a class. I already had accommodations at this point for MDD, ASD, and panic disorder, and my professor figured my diagnoses (unknown to him) were the cause of me clearly freaking out mid semester. He suggested an incomplete given I seemed to be clearly struggling and pushed back my final by a few weeks.

When this semester started, I had convinced myself I didn’t need more support and it likely was not that severe. Well, I was extremely wrong. I’ve entered levels of fatigue and depression that ring alarms for possible ME/CFS.

I have a final next Friday 5/15 in Class A, a presentation on 5/15 in Class B. I have asked Professor of Class C, whose final is on 5/12, if I could move it for a month out. He says he can’t understand how my diagnoses would interfere with final for Class B. My therapist has sent a letter detailing the symptoms I am experiencing and why I can’t study for two exams at once. Also I just started taking a medication after an emergency room visit this past weekend, and she believes I need a lengthy amount of time to prepare for this final, which I am lost in this class due to hardly being able to make it the past few weeks. This professor also said he notices I miss class a lot and asked why. But my accessibility center sent out letters way back at the beginning of the semester!

What do I do? What do I say?

Also sorry i originally posted to the r/bipolar but switched to here because it was awaiting moderator approval for too long and i have class in 3 hours. I also was struggling this and last semester with what i thought was just autism until i found out it was also bipolar 2(which im still skeptical about but that’s a convo for another day)