r/AutisticAdults

try to go out, socialize, and make friends, but every time I meet people, I feel like I’m an alien.
I feel like people follow a certain script: “insert small talk, hi, how are you, where are you from,” and I have zero interest in this bullshit.

I try to overcome this by practicing small talk, but people just stay stuck in small talk forever, with absolutely zero depth. What’s the point? It’s so exhausting.

Isn’t it a waste of time to stay in a loud bar, screaming at each other and talking about how nice the sun is or how oxygen is such an amazing resource?

Everyone is in groups or in a relationship, and I genuinely don’t understand how or why.

I’m always in the corner, people-watching.
I just don’t fit in. I feel like I’m from another planet.

I feel like I’m fucked because there seem to be no other ways to meet people or feel understood.

It’s sad.

I’ve seen myself as asocial for the longest time, but I’m beginning to realize that I’ve probably just internalized how others describe me.

In other words, it’s not that I’m not interested in people…it’s more like I’m interested in the FULL richness of the world. Sometimes it’s people I’m focused on…but it could be a forest, animals, an idea, a historical pattern, etc. There’s so much to the world!

But I seem to have been surrounded by people who are almost SOLELY interested in people, to the exclusion of all else. When they turn their gaze upon the wider world, it’s always through this sort of “consensus” filter. What’s important is what most people see as important. What’s interesting is only what’s interesting in the world of people, and to the degree to which it relates to the world of people.

I don’t know why being genuinely interested in the world at large, with all its wonders, is framed as distractibility or having your head in the clouds. Isn’t it just the opposite? My feet are more firmly planted on the ground! I’m more engaged with reality, actual biophysical REALITY…instead of insisting on seeing everything within some sort of agreed-upon social reality (which itself IS interesting…but why the hell does it have to be everything?!?).

Case in point, at least some (but probably most) people will read this and think: “dreamer.” But I grow my own food. I tend to my chickens and ducks. I build with wood. Why am *I* the dreamer? Why do we allow others to redefine words like “reality” and “practical” so that they refer to what amounts to a NARROWER and more DETACHED experience? It’s terribly confusing to me.

Is anyone else out there feeling this same cognitive dissonance?

The big art on the back is somehow still intact and the little logo on the front is intact but the rest is ripped to shreds. I can’t stop crying I love this shirt and I didn’t realise what I did until I woke up and saw it this morning.

Sensory issues mean it would be too uncomfortable to wear if I attached the pieces onto another tshirt. So I want the good pieces I have patched together into a new shirt. But I don’t know how to do that or where to take it. I could learn but I have chronic pain and I can’t even see a 2 inch hold right now. I’m so upset I’ve been so good about not ripping my clothes for years and I ruined a genuinely irreplaceable shirt I don’t know what to do I want my shirt back

Got diagnosed at 47. Realized the thing I'd been doing every morning for 25 years had a name. I'd just been calling it "showing up."

The commute was where it happened. Thirty, sometimes sixty minutes. Truck on a frozen highway, a bus, a plane, or ...and yes this was a real part of my life... a helicopter. That was my time. Slow and methodical. Like a rodeo clown putting on his makeup in the back of the trailer ...knowing exactly what he was walking into, maybe with a little bit of apprehension, but somewhere during the commute accepting that nothing was going to stop it. The rodeo doesn't care how you feel about it.

By the time I hit site the face was on. And it held.

For a while I had it easy. My role had me moving ...six, seven crews, pop in for a couple hours, back on the road. The commute reset everything. Fresh makeup every time. Keep the bulls guessing and distracted.

Then I covered a five day stretch. Same site. Same crew. Nowhere to go.

By lunch on day three the makeup was dripping. But the bulls were still full of energy, and they don't take lunch breaks. I'd find a quiet corner on my break and reapply. Quietly. Professionally. Nobody saw a thing. The clown held it together.

I never actually failed at it. Not once. I'm not sure if that's something to be proud of or not, but hot damn was it one of the most exhausting daily dances I had to do.

It wasn't just that stretch. It was every meeting. Every phone call. Every site visit. Every interaction that wasn't me with tools in my hands and a problem in front of me. The second it got professional ...the clown suit went on.

Got the diagnosis at 47. Sat with it for a minute. Thought about every commute. Every lunch break reapplication. Every long exhale walking into the hotel room at the end of the day when the makeup finally came off. There's probably more to unpack there...

It had a name the whole time.

I just called it "showing up."

Anyone else spend way too long not knowing what to call it?

So in these types of autism-related subs I notice a common theme of advice/suggestion handed out in response to loneliness complaints is (roughly) along the lines of "just go find other ND people to hang out with then" or "you just have to go where other ND people are"

But this is flawed advice if you think about it. I would wager a guess that most of us ND/autistic types trend towards the shy introvert or "homebody" personality type... so naturally we won't go outside much or physically go "hang out" somewhere. For example it's Memorial Day weekend coming up here in America, and my plans? Absolutely nothing, probably won't leave my apartment other than maybe a fast-food run or two and a quick trip to the grocery store

So online you and me might be perfectly compatible, share a lot of similar experiences/takes regarding living as an ND, and would otherwise make great friends but - you simply won't see me out in the physical world and we will never physically meet, I'll be at home in my apartment and out of sight. And of course, the people you actually encounter out in the physical/real world are most likely NT "normal" people (...and most likely the outgoing extroverted variety) which we are not compatible with/don't jive with due to our different brain wiring

I would even wager that a lot of us avoid going to the actual autism-specific meetup groups in our local area simply because we don't want to publicly be known as autistic (or we keep it on the downlow/secret). For example I don't openly tell anyone I am autistic, nor have I ever told an employer I am autistic. It might be different in other places like in Europe, but over here in America there really aren't any "benefits" to be derived from openly announcing that you are an ND type. Personally I prefer to just lean heavily on a "quiet shy guy that doesn't talk much" act in my daily life rather than openly telling people around me I am autistic - the fake shy guy act gets sympathy/stays under the radar, openly "coming out" as being autistic does not

Unfortunately we will always struggle to make/keep friends for a number of reasons, but the one that doesn't get mentioned much on here is that our kind are most likely going to be... at home and out of sight. So this "just go hang out with other NDs" advice really doesn't work for a lot of us as explained above, there is no easy answer for our specific loneliness problem sadly

I really dislike concert and symphony bow/encore rituals. Especially at symphonies where I thought it would be more refined. Instead you get this whole performance where the conductor leaves, comes back, bows, leaves, comes back, gestures to the soloist, leaves, comes back, maybe an encore, then leaves and comes back again. It’s adult peekaboo. And we’re all supposed to keep clapping through it like we didn’t just watch them walk offstage thirty seconds ago.

I’ve almost walked out a few times because the fakeness makes me so uncomfortable. I don’t really understand who this is for. The performers know we liked it. We know we liked it. Why are we doing this dance? Maybe there’s some tradition behind it I’m not picking up on, but in the moment it just feels strange.

And it’s not just symphony. I don’t really love the crowd response stuff at sports games either. The “GET LOUD” signs, the clap-along prompts, the cues telling you when to cheer. If a crowd needs to be told to make noise, is it really a reaction anymore? And even without the prompts, people act so shocked when something happens. A goal, a reasonably typical play, and everyone is stunned. But isn’t that what you came to see? I don’t really get why people seem so surprised.

This is a weekly thread in case you feel like checking in and telling us how you are doing. Non-mandatory things you might like to mention:

• How are you feeling?
• What's occupying your interest and attention?
• What song or clip sums up your current mood?
• What is something good or bad that has happened to you this week?

Memes are permitted in this thread if that's how you'd like to express yourself. Supportive comments only please. This is not a thread for seeking advice, giving advice, or arguing.

I'm not diagnosed autistic, I do have cptsd and have gone back and forth in my life about whether cptsd fully explains my symptoms or whether it's cptsd plus autism. I'm now leaning quite strongly to cptsd plus autism.

Anyway, I had quite a profound and life changing spiritual awakening and have noticed that of the people in my life who can relate to, it almost all of them are autistic.

I'm talking about the kind of thing Eckart Tolle talks about/the thing Buddhists are seeking/nonduality/seeing beyond the ego.

If anyone has any experience or thoughts on this please share!

I’m wondering if anyone else here deals with this, because I’m honestly feeling a bit alone with it.

I have level 1 autism and I’ve had an extremely strong gag reflex for as long as I can remember, especially when it comes to dental hygiene. It’s not just anxiety (although obviously I have some now too) — it’s a physical reflex. I can barely get a toothbrush in my mouth without violent gagging.

With a lot of effort and practice I’ve managed to brush a bit, but not nearly enough, and it has unfortunately caused dental problems over time.

I recently went to the dentist because I’m in pain and need multiple treatments (one extraction, one root canal, cleaning, wisdom teeth, etc.). They managed to do X-rays and examine me, but even that was difficult.

To test things, they suggested I take a relaxant before the appointment (diazepam). It actually helped more than I expected: the gagging was MUCH less intense and they could finally examine me and take X-rays. But I still had gagging “attempts,” and my dentist thinks it won’t be enough for longer procedures.

I’ve also tried anti-nausea medication, but because this seems to be such a strong reflex rather than nausea itself, they’re not convinced that will help much. My dentist thinks IV sedation would probably be the best option, and doesn’t think nitrous oxide (“laughing gas”) would be enough in my case. The thing that scares me is that, because my reflex is so strong, nobody seems fully sure if even sedation will completely work.

So I wanted to ask:

Does anyone else deal with an extreme gag reflex like this?

Especially if you’re autistic or have sensory issues?

What actually helped you?

Did IV sedation work?

Were you able to get through longer dental procedures?

Sometimes people assume it’s just “fear of the dentist” or that I should just push through it, but it genuinely doesn’t feel like that. It feels like my body immediately goes into full NOPE mode

Would really appreciate hearing from anyone who has been through something similar.

First off I am so upset and angry, it was 100% the other guys fault, the cop even wrote that in the police report because the guy tried to lie!!!!! Fucking scum bag, he also started to say his hand hurt only when the cops showed up and put up a handicap sign too lol, turns out the cop said it wasn't even his car so probably not his tag

I was driving in the left lane on a two lane highway when traffic in the right lane started to slow maybe 15-20 mph below what they were travelling at already because of on ramp traffic up ahead, I supposed I could have slowed expecting maybe someone could try and cut me off, but my lane was keeping that speed so I followed suit. This guy was inpatient and just merged right into the passenger front side of my car and destroyed the entire front end without putting on his blinker or anything, also it was not a slow merge, it was like he just quickly yanked his wheel like he was defending a position in F1 into me

Cars and motorsports are my special interest, especially Rally and that was actually my dream car, there is not a single other car in the entire world I would rather have. It was also the only thing I kept when I changed careers last year, I am now making like 1/4 of my old income and I sold my home gym, downsized, then moved back in with my mom which is hell but worth it for my new career, and through all that, I knew the car was an extra expense but it was my dream and worth it every single time I saw or drove it, now I am fucked no matter what happens, if it is fixed, it will never be the same, I will always listen to for noises and be fighting gremlins, if it is totalled, I cannot afford to go and buy another one until I get more established in my new field which could take another 5 years, and by then I might be priced out of being able to afford it because I know when they discontinue it, the price will rise even more, I mean it raised in value $4k after I drove it off the lot lol

I did all my own work on it, did the minor modifications myself, I would wash it twice a week in the winter because I live in the rust belt and once a week in the summer to keep it pretty. I would just go on drives and enjoy it, I would not even need to go fast to enjoy it.

If anyone wants to hear what it sounds like, I made a post with a video after I installed my intake, it makes all the noises you want a JDM turbo car to make.

I am so sad, the only thing in the entire world I loved more than that car is my dog who I pretty much treat like a child.

Now I feel this event is making me spiral, I used to have an anger problem and I can feel it resurfacing. I am also wanting to smoke a lot more weed which is never a good thing.

I just started dating again over the last few months and have actually been really enjoying the process for once instead of just constant anxiety, but I feel like now I am emotionally unstable and probably should not present myself in front of the few people I have been seeing.

I just feel like everytime I take a couple steps foward, life happens and I get kicked 2 or 3 steps back, some choices and times were 100% my fault, but these past few years have felt like a kick when I am down.

I have been trying to save money too but I just had to spend money on 2 failed fillings that needed to be turned into expensive crowns so that was like $2k down the drain, I do not regret that at all, I love my teeth and want the best for them, but it hurt and I was not expecting it, then literally JUST before the accident by TWO DAYS I bought $1500 worth of tires and an alignment for my car, so now that is down the drain too, that I regret, wish I waited a week or something then I would have that money. I am supposed to be doing a lot of work this summer in my new field but now my car will take who knows how long to repair because it has bespoke rare parts made in one factory in japan, meaning I am out of a vehicle and America's public transport in rural areas is non-existent unless you have bezos money to spend on uber everywhere.

I was also driving to a potluck at the time and made 5 pounds of sticky oyster sauce wings and now I just have 5 pounds of chicken and I am never going to be able to eat all this.

I have started all the insurance processes and have a body shop lined up to do the inspection/work, part of me thinks best case scenario in my current situation is the car gets deemed totalled in a week or two from now and I can just buy a new cheaper car, probably just a miata or something half the price but still enjoyable for me, I need transportation, I especially cannot be stuck at my mothers for extended periods of time feeling trapped like I did during childhood.

This is off topic but I actually despise my family, so the more I am around them the worse I do, they are not good people and they do not know or care about me. They also either directly abused me as a child or neglected to protect me from said abuse when informed, so I still hold grudges, I mean I joined the marine corps the escape them and it actually felt like heaven compared to back home lol. I just view my family as a tool to use now, my parents brought me into this world without my consent, so no matter what in my eyes a caretaker or parent must always give priority to the one being cared for, an example, I hike my dog 6 times a week because I know he needs it, even in rain or snow, he loves it, so I give his needs priority, when I am really sick and genuinely am stuck in bed, I can see how upset he gets when he doesn't stick to his routine, dogs love routines like we do. I have never once felt a priority to my family and have been let down in major events by them multiple times when needing their assistance.

I went to the Jiffy Lube today to get an oil change and I think I was strategically insulted because I was acting shy and they thought they could upcharge me. When I got out of my car I asked for an employee to drive it over the pit because it scares me, and I followed an employee to their lobby area so I could wait and use the restroom. I chatted with the cashier about my garden, and I told them multiple times I just wanted an oil change and air in my tires because I knew they’d try to talk me into add ons. I used the rest room, and then an employee walked in with my engine’s air filter.

He looked right at me and said “Are you dumb or do you just not care about your car?” I wasn’t anticipating him saying this, and I didn’t know what to say. After a few seconds I responded with “Well, I’m young so I guess I’m still pretty dumb.” Because that was the honest answer to his question. I asked him to list what was wrong with my car, and he gave a list, and I asked for a quote because I wanted to see what they were asking. He quoted me $1150 for a tune up, tire rotation, spark plugs, a coolant flush, brake fluid replacement, oil, filters, 3 hours of labor, and a waste disposal fee.

I didn’t want it, I negotiated, $700 for subtracting a few things. $400 after just the fluids and filters. I ended up just saying “No, I have no job right now. I can’t do that.” And that I would take the quote paper and remember the guy’s name for next time. Just to get them to back down because I felt BAD after he asked me if I was dumb or didn’t care. Like not paying him to work on my car for 3 hours was me being bad because I didn’t maintain my car right and this was my punishment or something. I sat back down and heard them talking about my car and just texted around to pass time. I paid, they acted sympathetic that I couldn’t afford it, and I went to the petstore next door and petted some rabbits while feeling deeply deeply uncomfortable.

I picked my roommate up from her job and told her what happened. It took her telling me that he was in the wrong and acting unprofessional and rude for me to finally process that they’d attempted to use an extremely rude and inappropriate upselling tactic on me. I just couldn’t believe it and I felt so insulted. I also couldn’t believe that I FELT guilty for being insulted. I was thinking in my head “yeah, you can’t take hard truths. He you shouldn’t be uncomfortable right now.” And I just feel so oblivious and sticky that I had to be told what happened to me, and that I appeared as a target because I looked naive or carried myself naively.

I can’t help but feel that if I just looked like a more official or tough adult then they wouldn’t have done that, and that it even happened in the first place. It took me a long time to get used to going to get oil changes and now I’m going to have to go to a new place because I hate them now.

UGH.

I am going to dread going to a new place for weeks before my next change. I’ve been going to jiffy lube for the full 4 years I’ve had a car.

So, I went to an autism association (here in Spain) for several days. Its for adults who dont need assistance, which is rare cause most associations are for kids/teens that need assistance... There was a girl I liked (ofc the post is about this). The association is a single room where most ppl are sit down in a table, but there is a couch and other stuff.

The girl sat down by herself and I tried to talk to her a couple of times and she seemed very nice, but I couldnt keep talking about personal stuff with everyone listening...

So finally today I asked her (by text) to hang out in a park or wherever, to know her. I even told her this, that I thought she was nice... But she said her parents wont let her cause they are very old fashioned (shes 32). She can only go out for the association.

Then she asked her parents and they said no.... I even offered to go and introduce myself to them and give them my phone number, but I dont think she told them this.

At first she seemed interested, but then she didnt put much effort... Or maybe IM reading it wrong, cause she said her parents would be mad at her... Idk... Maybe there was interest or maybe there wasnt...

I dont know what to do, I dont think Ill go back to the association, I dont like groups and I dont feel comfortable and I only keept going cause of her, but I dont even have chances to talk to her anymore...

She also says that she doesnt like to text, so thats a no too... So I think its over...

Im very sad... I dont have chances to meet anybody, and its very rare that I like somebody like I liked her...

Im very lonely...

Hello, my husband and I would like to interview and speak to a couple of high functioning adults (preferably women) living with autism and /or ADHD. My husband has (I view as) unrealistic expectations for my 6 year old daughter (who has high functioning AuDHD) future, thinking that she can one day as an adult become fully independent without any supports or need any accomodations in the world or workplace to be successful. We think it would be helpful for him to learn firsthand from adults who had therapy/ accomodations as children, then were able to figure out to use less accomodations as adults but still use some within reason to be successful in their adult life, and be able to assimilate without having to only mask day to day.

Please comment or PM me if you would like to chat with us, thank you in advance for your help!

Do we need to switch to more literal interpretations automatically when we communicate, or is it better to just ask precisely what you mean (considering differences exist in types of communication even between autistic people)?

I (27 f) work as a paralegal at a law firm where I’ve been for 2.5 years. I’ve grown pretty close to my coworkers and I’m leaving my job next week to move to a new state to start law school.

Today everyone was in my office talking about something, and I mentioned that I had glow in the dark stars on my ceiling and I use zoo pals plates, among other things. It kind of escalated from there and everyone started saying I need to grow up and that I’m going to law school and it’s not appropriate to be so childish. One coworker also made a comment about how I “make her think” about my husband which I really don’t like. It sounded like she was implying he’s a…you know.

I’m leaving next week but it still hurt :( just needed to vent a little.

I was illegally put on a 5150 (there has to be action taken for the hold to be legal and there wasn’t. I did not attempt to harm myself or anyone else). I called my county’s medi-cal behavioral health hotline to get therapy referrals. The guy over the phone asked me a lot of questions and I answered the questions honestly. He offered to have a crisis team evaluate me and said it would be completely voluntary and that I could refuse. I said yes. After he sends them, he tells me the cops may come.

I never would’ve agreed to this if I knew the police would be involved. I refused to go to a crisis center and they 5150d me and put me in handcuffs. I was in cuffs for 3 hours and I spent the night in the ER with an IV in my arm that bled while I slept. I dealt with nurses in the ER and the ward who were physically rough with me when doing my vitals.

The psych ward I was at was awful. I was terrified. I only stayed one night in the psych ward, one night at the ER. I couldn’t imagine being on a 14 day hold- those poor people. We didn’t have individual therapists. They refused to give me my meds for one night. The group “therapy” was like a kindergarten class.

I was telling a couple women there that it isn’t go to the psych ward or nothing- that they deserve actual treatment (voluntary residential/php/iop) and how they can get it. I feel bad for everyone at the facility.
They all need help and instead they’re in a mental health prison. I especially feel bad for those who have no visitors. This was the most traumatic experience of my life. I have never been so terrified in my life. I was privileged enough to be able to have an attorney to help me get out sooner- I feel for those who don’t have this privilege.

The place I was at had a lot of medi-cal (California Medicaid) recipients so I’m sure they think they can do whatever since these patients probably lack financial resources. I’m just an adult who aged out of being able to be on my parents’ health insurance but I have family with the money for an attorney.

I was able to get out for these reasons:

My family paid for an attorney that specializes in cases like mine. They determined I was illegally held there, which allowed me to be released a day early. Now, I need to appeal this decision to ban me from owning a lethal weapon for 5 years. I know I have a solid case considering there was no legal reason to 5150 me.
I was clearly lucid- I was the only one that was.
I was pretty much cooperative. I followed the rules. I did my best to keep my emotions in check to not make myself look bad. I didn’t cause trouble for the staff. I didn’t have problems with the other patients.
I said that since I got there, I had no thoughts of hurting myself or others.

The attorney I got practices law in California. If you are interested in this person’s services, DM me and I will give them to you.

My advice to you to not get 5150:

Be extremely careful who you tell if you have suicidal ideation, homicidal ideation, or thoughts of harming. Do not tell a behavioral health line this. In my experience, 988 and the friendship line along with the peer run California warm line have been safe.
Do not go to a crisis bed center. They will easily send you to a psych ward. Do not have a crisis team come to your house. NEVER I MEAN NEVER tell police if you have thoughts of hurting yourself and others.

What to do if you get 5150d:

Cooperate. Do advocate for yourself but pick your battles. I was cooperative but insisted I be given my meds that help with my mental health (not controlled substances). Go to the groups. Remember, your number one priority is escaping the hellhole.
Stay away from assholes/crazy patients.
Don’t get into arguments with other patients. If someone is being an asshole to you, just ignore them. Don’t debate staff or patients.
Be as emotionally levelheaded as possible.
Tell them that since you’ve arrived, you haven’t had thoughts of harming yourself and others. It doesn’t matter if you do or don’t have those thoughts. Never tell them if you have thoughts of harming yourself or others. These places are mental health prisons- they will not help you get better.
Have an aftercare plan in place. At minimum, say you plan to get weekly therapy. Involve family in the aftercare plan if you can.
Tell them about the goals you want to achieve when you leave. They’ll ask what you plan to do when you leave. Ensure your answer talks about doing things that are productive and meaningful.
Get an attorney who specializes in these cases. If your family will pay for it, let them. If anyone offers to pay for the attorney, let them. Even if you aren’t on great terms with the person helping pay for the attorney. Even if your hold is legal, you are still entitled to a hearing in front of a judge. An attorney can advocate for you to be released in this hearing.
Don’t talk to people on the phone who will upset you. Don’t have visitors that will upset you or lash out. Avoid reactions.

Everyone deserves real help for their mental health. Do not share thoughts of harm to self in others in the ER, to cops, crisis people, or people in psych wards. Find a therapist who is a safe person to tell this to. If you want treatment that’s more intensive than individual therapy, look into support groups.

Or residential (not psych inpatient or crisis res), PHP, and IOP programs. I did PHP/IOP for 7 1/2 months and discharged from the program last year. This program greatly helped me. I wouldn’t go for a PHP/IOP program affiliated with a hospital as those places are way more likely to 5150 you. Private or nonprofit practices are less likely to do that.

Also my empathy goes out to fellow autistics who have been in this situation. I am autistic and it’s definitely worse for us.

Hey everybody,

Through working with an ADHD specialist, I recently learned that I likely have some degree of autism. I just finished my 2L year, and I wanted to reach out to see if there are any lawyers/attorneys here who also have some degree of autism, and ask how they manage both their disorder and their practice.

I have found it very difficult in really any job I’ve had, but especially in my legal jobs/internships. Specifically, I tend to take much longer than most people to complete assignments.

I really appreciate any feedback!

I've been having a tough time at work lately, particularly after being a sole subordinate for 5 years with a director who has become increasingly unsupportive.

I support roughly 300 end users in a healthcare facility.

My boss has failed to properly advocate for me imo, and his lack of understanding of what I go through every day is reaching a breaking point. The only thing that's holding me together is that the office I used to have to myself is now shared with the new guy who we hired for the promotion that I've had my eyes on since I got the job.... that's also supposed to be my supervisor. I'm not sure he even knows he's my supervisor.

The nursing department has the most IT support needs by far and it's not even close.

A new nurse has been adjusting to her new role and has had continued difficulty with the printer (of course)

She had 3 separate issues over the course of 3 days. Each one resolved with one email reply.

Today, after my reply, I got a panicked call from the assistant director of nursing DEMANDING that I come over there right that second in the pouring rain to help them with their "broken printer". This is a common occurrence with them.

I tried to gently push back, "there's nothing I can solve there that I can't solve here", and then she straight up THREATENED to escalate.

So of course, I oblige, and was able to fix the "problem" by observing that the nurse seemed to have accidentally set her print job to print on both sides and setting it to one-sided....

After, I talked to my boss about it, and he immediately took their side explaining "this is a highly customer-service-centric role, if it takes more than one email reply to solve a problem, you need to go over there". It's not the first time he's said that. The problem could've been solved in half the time right there on the phone. How is that not better "customer service"? What aspect of "customer service" requires me to provide emotional support for people? What aspect of "customer service" requires me to allow someone to offload ALL of their cognitive abilities to me when demanded?

I think I need to go to HR, but I don't even know where to start... I've never gone to HR with a work issue before.

Yes, I'm aggressively looking for a new job. It's so fucking hard, man. Everything.

What do I do :(

much has been said about the dificulties around taking sarcasm as literal. Which i definitely have issues with, but how about teasing?

I for one get very confused and often frustrated with teasing, even if the person was just trying to be playful and not trying to be mean.

How about you?

Hello and Help!

I am currently sitting in my dark bedroom under the blanket while my friends have a murder mystery dinner next door. I had a long day with a lot of unforseen changes and I am just so done - I can't participate. I think its overstimulation, but before I got diagnosed these feelings were classified as panic attacks.

My head feels hot and feverish my body feels like my nerves are constantly under tension. I am shaking and I am nauseous and I just feel in pain so badly.

I used to have this feeling in this extreme more often but I try to avoid getting overstimulated in the first place since my diagnosis. Its just not always possible.

What do you do to calm yourself down?

When I am overstimulated "normally" I just go into a dark quiet room and rest, I feel sick but I CAN rest. This one now I can't rest, I feel more actively sick. I am shaking and I just puked. Do you experience overstimulation as bad too?

What do you do to calm down, this is unbearable.