Passive aggressive Humour for mailbox access policy

My organisation has lots of EA's who are lovely people and generally helpful.
They do hate to follow processes and I've told them repeatedly via the operations teams chat to stop asking for other peoples Inbox access as I have to say no and it makes me feel like a grinch.

Today's Ai generated poem to really underline things (even HR send a laughing emoji)

I will not say yes with a click or a grin,
I will not grant access just on a whim.
I will not approve from a forward you send,
Or bend all the rules just to help or befriend.

I will not change access by text on the fly,
No matter how urgent the reason or why.
I cannot ignore all the steps we must take,
For process and policy are not mine to break.

I’m not being cruel, I’m not here to be mean,
I’m just guarding the systems that keep things pristine.
I don’t make the rules, I just follow them through,
As tricky and tedious as they may feel to you.

So please don’t keep asking — I won’t cave, you’ll see,
This Grinch has a process (and forms!) as his key. 🎄

reddit.com
u/dannybau87 — 9 days ago

Passive aggressive Humour for mailbox access policy

My organisation has lots of EA's who are lovely people and generally helpful.
They do hate to follow processes and I've told them repeatedly via the operations teams chat to stop asking for other peoples Inbox access as I have to say no and it makes me feel like a grinch.

Today's Ai generated poem to really underline things (even HR send a laughing emoji)

I will not say yes with a click or a grin,
I will not grant access just on a whim.
I will not approve from a forward you send,
Or bend all the rules just to help or befriend.

I will not change access by text on the fly,
No matter how urgent the reason or why.
I cannot ignore all the steps we must take,
For process and policy are not mine to break.

I’m not being cruel, I’m not here to be mean,
I’m just guarding the systems that keep things pristine.
I don’t make the rules, I just follow them through,
As tricky and tedious as they may feel to you.

So please don’t keep asking — I won’t cave, you’ll see,
This Grinch has a process (and forms!) as his key. 🎄

reddit.com
u/dannybau87 — 11 days ago
▲ 2.3k r/revengestories+1 crossposts

Oh the things I'll do to your ex girlfriend

The Setup

I'm from a secular family where doing normal young adult things is no big deal (drinking, premarital sex staying, out late etc) .
I was hanging out with a new group of friends who were mostly Christian but did normal young adult things (just quietly though)
Amongst the group one of the guys had a reputation of being a prig and a prude that didn't do young adult things.

The Conflict

To each there own I say but I'd heard from multiple people that he was saying things behind my back that weren't true and actively warning girls to stay away from me.

During this time at a uni party I bumped into his ex girlfriend who he was still very much in love with and the poor thing looked very uncomfortable and out of place.
When I'm drunk I'm super friendly so I bought her a coke, introduced her to some people, we had a nice chat about our hometown then I went on my merry way.

The next week I met her between classes and she confessed she'd been uncomfortable because she'd heard horrible things about me and had assumed I was going to grope her or something.
I'm normally not one for being subtle but I had an inspired thought and on the spot thought of an amazing petty revenge plan.

The Plan

From that moment on I took every opportunity to spend time with this lovely lady, I lived on campus so invited her round for tea, I'd put nice comments on her facebook, I'd always be on my best behaviour whenever we were in a group setting.
Above all I NEVER said a bad word about her ex

The Result

I heard on the grapevine that he'd approached her at a party and was freaking out that this evil secular monster was attempting to corrupt her.
She scolded him saying what a nice guy I was, how I had never bad mouthed him and he should be more concerned with how he treats girls.

They never got back together and I was happy to hear about how annoying and petty she found him.

I quite enjoyed her company on top of the benefits of petty revenge and still think fondly over our platonic friendship.

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u/dannybau87 — 14 days ago

What happened to Connect Foods Pumpkin Seeds Cocoa & Sea Salt?

Was delicious and nutritious, my wife put me onto them and they just randomly stopped being sold :(

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u/dannybau87 — 22 days ago

Car park Boomer decided I could wait

Finished doing the groceries and it was raining slightly.

I put the shopping bags into the boot and when I got to the side of the vehicle there was an oversized American style ute (truck for anyone not Australian) boomer had his door open directly in front of my drivers side door so I couldn't get in.

I smiled and said in a friendly tone

Excuse me you're blocking my door can you please close it so I can get out? 😀

Boomer got that look like I was the one inconveniencing him and said no! you can wait. 😠

He had a trolley full of groceries all loose packed (not in bags) and was not in any hurry getting them in despite the rain and me being stuck.

I waited until he wouldn't be pinned and closed his door so I could get into the car.

He started getting all aggressive about me being an impatient prick.

I lowered my window let my face go blank (great way to worry people) and said being old is no excuse for being rude.

He didn't do the full shake angry fist temper tantrum I was hoping for and luckily he didn't try and attack me out the car either so just drove off chuckling that I finally got a story to post here 😁

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u/dannybau87 — 30 days ago

No shower fan advice

I bought my apartment 5 years ago and it doesn't have a shower fan. Leaving the window open all year does ok but it occasionally gets mouldy.

Any clever tricks to fix this?

I've painted it with mould resistant paint but it only slows it down

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u/dannybau87 — 2 months ago

Just finished a review of password managers for my organisation (we went with Bitwarden)

Here is my overview of what the deciding factors were because I couldn't really see any product differentiation.
Server Location
We're in Australia so the servers had to be based in either AU NZ or Europe as generally US and China have incompatible laws with data privacy.

Breach Track Record
It's all publically available and if they have 0 Knowledge architecture it reduces your risk even futher

Pricing
Bitwardens is open source so it was by far the cheapest.

Doing a trial in one week so will update the post if I notice any problems with it

reddit.com
u/dannybau87 — 2 months ago

Pipes stolen

It appears some outdoor copper pipes were stolen when the house I just bought was vacant.

We've got house insurance but I'm not sure if we should use it.

Would rates go up and would a few pipes be worth the excess?

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u/dannybau87 — 2 months ago

Picking up the keys in a few hours and it occured to me that a house built in 1950 which the previous owner was kind of a slumlord that did 0 maitenance for the last half century it's going to be a cold victorian winter.

We're not going to spend any real money since we're going to tear things down once we have saved up enough but any insulation tricks and tips would be appreciated.

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u/dannybau87 — 2 months ago
▲ 0 r/movies

Wikipedia plot "Walt is estranged from his spoiled family" this is backwards to anyone who watched the film.
Walt is a cantakorous grump who is rude to pretty much everyone who isn't a drinking buddy and even admitted to the priest that he never tried to connect with his sons "he didn't know how". (aka I was the father and exected someone else to raise my kids now I can't stand them)

Every relationship that blossoms in the movie is because people ignore his rudeness and try to help him.

We all loves a redemption story but I felt sorry for the sons, their father who never had time for them or their kids randomly gives the neighbours the time and attention he refused his own blood their whole life.
If he really repented he would have finally said something nice to them or at least left some meaningful words in the will.

Definitely an example of generation me only looking after themselves and then wondering why things suck.

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u/dannybau87 — 2 months ago