Dad punched his son and left a bruise
The title says punched but it’s PINCHED (won’t let me change the title)
I woke up to my son screaming upstairs. He was with his sister and his father, so I felt that he was safe. I heard both my children fighting and assumed their father was handling it. I put my clothes on and did quiet time, then headed upstairs. His father was on the phone in the kitchen when I headed to the living room to check on my son. My son was curled in a ball on the couch and I assumed he was spanked so I went to console him, but he immediately looked up at me and told me to look at what his dad did. There was a bruise on his right leg. I asked him what happened and he said his Dad “did like this” as he proceeded to show me the pinching motion. So I asked him if his dad pinched him and he said yes. After his dad got off the phone I asked why he bruised our son. He said that our son was talking back, saying no and screaming. I explained to him that there’s no excuse for him to be pinched so hard that he becomes bruised. I then explained to him the importance of regulation and that when our son is acting in such a way that it is his job as a father to help our son learn to regular his emotions whether it’s giving him two minutes alone to calm down, hugging him or rubbing his arms or chest to calm down his nervous system or helping him with breathing techniques. His father no then proceeded to say he was screaming to be a butt, shook his head and rolled his eyes. I then explained to him that 4 year olds don’t act out on purpose. They don’t know how to regulate yet so they’re going to do what they think is best and that it’s our job to help them learn how to handle their emotions. I also brought to his attention how hard he had to have pinched him to bruise his skin and that it is abuse. So instead of helping our son he just tried to forcefully shut him up. His father remained quiet and just said okay. I then told him not to do it again and to do his research on how to parent better. I then left to grab my daughter a diaper. For the remainder of the day, the kids and I stayed upstairs while their father was downstairs.
He’s never done this before and I think I am in shock. I know from family history that this is the start to something worse, but we live with his family and I cut my family off so I have no where to go. I don’t even know what to do. He also was in therapy for cyclothymia but recently stopped going because it was conflicting with his work schedule. So I don’t know if him going back to therapy would make it better or if I should even give him the chance. I don’t know.