I Can’t Stop Thinking About A Guy Who’s Name I Do Not Know.
Please excuse any typos in this post. And I apologize if I sound like a creep this has been on my mind non stop. T-T
Before judging me harshly or thinking non- positive things about my story please show compassion and respect! ( and please hear me out!!!!!) Please keep in mind that this is a genuine story with genuine and pure feelings behind it. In no way do I mean anything negative or harmful to myself or the guy this is about!
I may have fallen for a guy whose name I don’t know. For context we met on a Vacation back in 2021. We were at Volcano bay in Orlando Florida. It was towards the end of July. It was supposed to be a family vacation to celebrate my birthday, and my younger cousins birthday. It was simply the worst day of my life. Pretty much that entire day I had been talked down on by my mom. We don’t have the best relationship and she’s abusive. That day she said horrible things about the way I looked, what I wore and she compared me to my younger cousins. By the time we had arrived at the water park I had already cried a few times bc of her. I kept thinking to myself that I didn’t really matter and that no one enjoyed my company. I was the odd one out on the vacation. I was alone and trying my best to avoid the wrath of my mother.
But sometime later my cousins showed up asking me if I wanted to go to the wave pool with them. I said yeah bc I was tired of being alone. And that’s where I saw him. I saw him out of the corner of my eye. He was super tall, had long hair, kind of a lean build and he had green and blue swim shorts. Some time after playing in the wave pool my cousins and I left to go to smaller pool that wasn’t a wave pool. I saw that guy again. At first I tried paying him no attention until I saw one of my cousins talking with him. I couldn’t help but look at him. I thought he was very attractive but bc I didn’t know anything ab him I tried brushing it off. But I couldn’t help myself. It felt weird— I had never felt that way about a guy. Even tho I was a teenager at the time I felt way too young to have a crush! I’m not sure how it came about, but in the midst of me staring off into space, I heard him ask my name. And I gave it to him ofc, but for some reason, I don’t remember asking for his name. He started asking me questions about myself and about my family trip, but I could only think to myself that his curiosity and his interest in me was nothing but general conversation between two strangers. I thought to myself how could a guy this attractive be interested in anything about me?After the questions/introduction was over we started to play together. Keep in mind we were pretty young so when I say we were playing I’m talking about both of going underwater and waving at each other. We would smile at one another and give each other high fives. And ofc we held hands like teenagers do. It was the first time I felt seen during that entire vacation. Someone had finally noticed me. I didn’t have to beg for any attention and someone showed me kindness out of the good of their heart. He cheered me up and brightened my day when I felt completely useless. I feel like it was such a rare moment for me. Growing up I never received genuine kindness without having to prove myself worthy of receiving it. He was also the first guy to be so kind to me. Even though it seems like nothing as I type this out— this kind of stuff means a lot for someone in a toxic environment/household, like mine. Before meeting him, I had this general idea that all men and even young guys were dangerous. Unfortunately I put this same idea onto him as well. But as I think back he never gave me any reason to suspect him the way I did. I’m so glad I met him when I did. Now I know kindness exists not as a reward for doing something good, but out of compassion for someone whose story you do not know.
The real reason I feel like I may have developed feelings for this guy is because of how my very first relationship ended. To be honest, I only dated my first boyfriend because I told myself that I will never run into the guy from the waterpark ever again. But about a week before I broke up with my ex, we got into a really bad argument. He said some horrible things about me and hurt me in many ways. And in that moment, when I receive the horrible words from my ex I broke down crying and abruptly said to myself that “the guy from the waterpark would have never treated me like this.” I don’t even know why I said that. I hadn’t thought of that guy in any way during the time of my first relationship. What started out as a simple conversation between two strangers saved me from going down a path I probably wouldn’t be able to recover from. It’s been quite some time since I ended, my first relationship but I can’t seem to shake off the memories and feelings from that day. It made me realize that the guy from the waterpark was almost like my first love.
Before my family and I left the waterpark me and that guy made a promise. I promised him that I would come back to the spot we first met; in the wave pool. I wonder if he even remembers that day or if he ever thought of me in any way. I wonder if he saw right through my smile. I wonder if he could tell that something was wrong. I wonder if he did all of that because he wanted to do cheer me up. Part of me thinks he was just a genuine person and wanted to be nice. I feel like I will never see him again. I wish I could have stayed in contact with him. And for some reason after five years, I still remember him to this day.
Does this sound obsessive or weird? Any advice would be lovely!! And if you feel like I need a slap of reality, please feel free to say it in a respectful manner ^^ thanks for reading!!!!