u/LibrarianEquivalent

We live in a house with 5 people total, we all get along pretty well except for the one roommate I'll call "problem".

My parents own the house and agreed to rent it to me, my gf and two friends. Notice how that adds up to 4 not five people. My friend's girlfriend (problem) came over (more than a year ago) for what we thought was a few nights because her family was giving her a hard time or something.

Problem never left, in fact problem started splitting rent with my friend unknown to us until I overheard them talking about it. After that my parents were forced to write problem into the lease.

Problem never was grateful for the cheap living in a relatively nice house, she ignores us for the most part and is a messy, loud and annoying person. We tried being friendly but she would flat out ignore us when we tried to say hi. She's highly narcissistic, but regardless the quality of living significantly decreased in the household once problem moved in.

Now we have been on a month to month contract since problem got on the lease pretty much. We will be signing a yearly lease soon, and returning to a 4 person contract, our landlords will not be renewing problem's lease.

It feels great to know we'll be at peace soon, though we might have to find a new roommate to replace my friend if he decides to leave with problem, especially because she's insanely controlling of him.

I'm looking to get an alignment on my vehicle but I'm a student at UL so I'd prefer somewhere affordable. Any recommendations?

Someone entertain me please

Earlier today my girlfriend and I had just started drinking, so naturally I had to take a fat piss. She asks me the old "can I hold it while you pee?" She had done so before with no issues.

However, this time was different. My girlfriend is holding on to my cucumber and I'm releasing my pressurized stream. All of the sudden, she starts lightly squeezing my johnson (unintentionally, probably just trying to keep a firm grasp of the situation at hand).

If you're a guy you'll know that squeezing your friend while breaking the seal is a good way to increase the back pressure and velocity of you urine from the unit.

There was the mistake, my stream of golden rain hits the toilet lid, she tries to correct it but only makes it worse. I end up weeting the cabinets to the right of the throne and the toilet paper and trash can situated to the left of me.

Thankfully I regain control of my penis and put a stop to the stream gone loose. Though the destruction was not avoided. I had to clean the mess created by us.

TL;DR: I let my girlfriend hold my penis while I pissed after having a drink. She got scared and a mess resulted. Had to clean up after myself.

Everyone is safe and ok by the way