

Need help with my Kingdom, Nords are pain in the butt
I made my own kingdom, breaking away from Swadia starting from Veluca. The underscored towns are the ones I intend on having for myself (I had Yalen and Jelkala for a long time but gave them away, honestly don't know why hahah). Swadia, Rhodoks, Sarranids all eliminated thus lords are flocking to the Nords and Khergits while I have to beg 1 on 1 for them to join me. The "circled" parts are what my vassals have and this is a problem looking online because they are holding too many fiefs by the looks of it.
They have sizeable armies ranging around 100-150 but they are slow so they can barely defend although they are handy when I invade others. Now I'm at war with both the Nords and Khergits both fielding around 1400 troops with the marshal, I can't beat them even if I band together because they still have twice the numbers and the huscarls are still strong even if I have swadian knights.
The Nords have taken my Dhirrim probably marching south, the Khergits are sieging Shariz and I want to cry. I think I'm around 780 days into the campaign.
Do you guys have any tips or pointers how do I continue expanding and how to get out of this mess? I think only 1 vassal is martial maybe 2 and the rest are the nice lords.