u/LifeRefrigerator4601

25F P plater here.

I had an accident months ago, if you can even call it that.

Car park. I was moving between the isles, had right of way and a driver coming in from the road honked at me while I was already in the strip.

Both cars stopped just shy of touching. My car has ABSOLUTELY NO DAMAGE. He demanded money on the spot... and when me a scared woman asked to call my brother... he stright up left, gave me the wrong insurance provider and then started demanding I pay for a replacement vehicle over text.

We had heard nothing for months... now he's claiming $2000 worth of damage through his insurance that doesnt match the photos he gave me on the day of the accident (after he fled) and is actually impossible based on the height of the damage. My car literally would have had to flip for this to happen.

My insurance have said that I cant make a claim because I have no damage on my car. Like AT ALL. My car is WHITE we would know.

Im a cancer remission patient and have appointments to pay for. My big 2nd year check is coming up and the stress has led to me dropping 3 kilos and vomiting. I don't know what to do.

Back on this redit and nearly at my second year in remission.

I am fully aware that I may be kicking up because October is the anniversary of my Diagnosis as well as the month my late Auntie was diagnosed with a different Cancer that ended up taking her life.

But Fomo has been affecting me to an extreme post treatment.

For context I am 25 and have been unfortunate in my ability to make friends. In highschool my friends were my bully's. I graduated started uni. Covid happened. Uni was from home. I made no friends at uni. And right when I found out I had graduated. Boom. Cancer. (And my partner cheated on me the week I found out...)

I weirdly had a stream of luck with some online friends throughout my treatment. They are some of if not the most precious people to me. Online made it easy to stay in contact to a degree but I still missed things due to drs appointments and treatments.

To this day I get THE WORST fomo melt downs. Particularly when im too sick to attend things. But honestly even with scheduling conflicts. I just get so scared that I'm easy to dismiss and have fun without. It can literally paralyse me from talking because I get so "I dont want to bother/wory" people about it but also "please dont forget me" mentally too. It is the WORST.

Has anyone else experienced this post treatments? I feel so altered.

25 F.

For context I am a new grad, coming back to teaching after a year gap because I was battling cancer. I am also a qualified librarian but while looking for librarian jobs decided to CRT to make connections (and money).

edit because people are not fully understanding the situation.

1. Yes I am a trained teacher but I don't want to be a teacher anymore. This is why i studied librarianship but I decided to crt for the money. Its not something I am passionate about but doing purely as a financial boost. We are living in a financial crisis right now. So frankly, im going to get money where I can.

2. I was not booked/asked to CRT today. I actually went into the school to purely organise the ICT set up AND JUST THAT. The school BOOKED ME WITHOUT ASKING or EVEN finding out if I was free for the full day. I have a 1st job and if I had been Rostered there this school would have had to deal with it. I found out i was teaching 10 minutes before class and the admin end up admitting she had not ask by saying "oh yeah... I meant to ask." Because of this the ICT day that was actually organised ended up being them shooing me out and putting me in classrooms with no notice. I understand that this is an on call job. But I also think the school needs to actually ask before they book. I had 0 way of leaving digital notices for teachers. Yes I hand wrote stuff and no of course I was not prepared because the day arranged WAS NOT TO ACTIVELY TEACH I didnt even have a water bottle on me.

OG POST: Its been a massive punch in the gut. This school didnt even have me hooked up to their compass so I couldn't look at student profiles, no notes nothing. The day was meant to be an ICT day but the school slapped me into a classroom, no warning, not even asking if I was available tbh they just did it. Full day mind you. I had to skip first period to move my car because again, they didnt tell me of this so parking was a hassle.

But I think whats hit the most is student behaviour to CRTs and lack of notes from teachers as well as delegation.

1. as soon as students know they have a CRT they are gone. There is no respect because you are not their teacher. Threats of notifying their teachers are null. Basically. No one did work. I was screamed at by children and than shooed to the next room.
2. Lack of notes from teachers. Teachers... who set up 1 activity... I hate you. I do because the amount to "im done miss, what do I do, I am not going to play a YouTube video out loud right now's" I get. Made me want to pull my hair out. And tbh 90% of the time the kid had not finished the work.
3. delegation. Tell me why every class i had today... was a "difficult" home room group(AS TOLD BY OTHER TEACHERS) So i got the asshole kids. Sorry. Also I put down my subjects and was forced into classes outside of that... what? Why do schools ASK you put them down then.

I'm feeling so disrespected and disgusting today. Just all over. I have reminded myself why after cancer I refused to go to teaching full time but CRT feels like something I could only do 2-3 days a week if I break my sanity.

So im a new frad teacher who has decided to do CRT this year (I want to be a librarian and have finished my degree but want to make connections in schools).

I have found a school that has taken me in independently which is great, but I missed a shift offer today and im feeling a bit bad. Especially because they called me before my on boarding was finished and without any introduction to the school which I'd been expecting... I hope that it hasnt ruined my reputation/reliability before ive started.

Any tips on how to prepare for shifts short notice or just general CRT tips? Im thinking of making a ready-bag with things like my card holder, a pencil case with whiteboard markers and such. I still dont know if this school wants me to bring my own laptop or will supply me with one so I'm finding that out.

So. Im scared of being unable to contribute to my Group.

We are multi timezone and online. So scheduling has been so hard. Genuinely a miracle that we'll have been going for the better half of a year.

I love the DND, I love the plot, my friends, the story but theres on issue.

I am scared of not contributing enough.

I am pretty sure I land on the spectrum (as most players do haha) for context.

I recently felt as if I had fallen out with my character and became disconnected with them. Talking and RPing less and unfortunately playing on days of high stress (outside of DND) which lead to me being non verbal for one whole game. It made me feel so bad because my group is full of some amazing RPers and writers. It led me to feel like im missing the bar and letting them down a little.

I know DND is meant to be fun and that i shouldn't put pressure on myself to perform but I find it very difficult due to the fact that my party is full of such creatives. Like we write one shots for our OCs outside of game level.

I havent been able to do much of that due to work and health issues. I have a medical condition that leads to me getting exhausted much easier and quicker than the average person. And a lot of our games have been scheduled right on the dot or an hour into my work shifts.

Its international and for the sake of availability and not letting the group down ive let it go. But recently we played 2 games there weren't on the edge of my work and holy. I felt and played so much better. I felt really good about my character.

And... now for the next 2 sessions we're going back edge to edge with my work. I'll be honest, it does bother me. Because I feel the timing of the sessions doesnt allow me to do my best. I struggle to bring it up with my DM because [i dont want to be a burden and multi time zone DND is hard enough to book as is] but at the same time... it is effecting the fun factor to me.

I genuinely think its probably a me issue because I shouldn't take the commitment to a fun game with friends so easily. Its just very hard when i constantly see the rest of my group putting 100% into the game and it dont feel like i can.

Hi. I was diagnosed with ThyCa almost 2 years ago. Ive been in remission for 1 year. I'm 25.

The year I was diagnosed with cancer, one of my friends had passed away to another form of cancer. Last year in October my auntie had been diagnosed with brain cancer. It was just a few days after my diagnosis anniversary.

I remember being so shocked. And angry and sad at her prognosis. I remember asking. "Why did I get the easy one. Why couldn't auntie have." I remember not talking to my cousin and best friend. Because I thought she would hate me for having "the good cancer" while her mums prognosis was dire.

I remember disassociating for days. Because I couldn't cope with the idea I was going to still be here and she wouldn't.

And now I am. And the feeling hasnt gone away.

I think it eats at my brain every day. Why am I here? Why couldn't my friend and auntie be here. Why did I get the 'easy' one.

I graduated my dream degree last year. The same month we were both diagnosed. And despite applying for jobs. I havent gotten anything.

I still work at the job that mistreated me throughout my entire treatment.

The rejections have only made it harder. These people had lives, careers. People who had meaningful contributions to the world. And im just here. Struggling. And it feels like such a loss to the universe. How unfortunate that I'm the one who got to stay because I dont feel worthy of it.

And then theres seeing my mum grieving her best friend every day. Seeing my best friends life juat remaining stagnet and unmoving. And I feel so helpless. I cant help them. And then it makes me feel more guilty.

To say I cry every day is an understatement and to that I even feel guilty. Like im wasting everything. That im just stuck and I cant get out. That it should have been me. And they should still be here.

Just a vent. Nothing major. Just something ive noticed since working after being in remission and living on Thyroxine.

For context: I work casual (AUS) and so I have a roster but also of course people call in sick and sometimes they need replacements.

Ive talked to a lot of management about giving me appropriate notice for morning shifts. Because to work 7am, I need to wake up at 5am to take the Thyrox (i wait 40 min before food), give it time to kick in and then eat and get ready to go to work. If they give me an hour or less of notice for a pick up, it really doesnt work.

And listen. I love a sleep in. So if im not working in the morning, I will sleep in.

Just had work ask me to come in with half an hour of notice right as I woke up. Tell me why when I said 'sorry I cant as I have to wait 40 minutes before I can eat due to my condition' their answer was why couldn't I start 20 minutes after the medication would kick in...

My guy. I have to... EAT and DRIVE to work... it was a work colleague who i know and get along with who knows about the whole ordeal and medication too. Which is just. Mmm. It did upset me like. My guy i truely did not ask to be on medication for life. Thanks for reminding me its annoying for YOU. Its definitely not annoying for me to live day to day with my mood and energy depending on a pill.

Thats it. Thats the post. Nearly every day I go home angry, anxious or crying. I dont know how much longer I can do this.