u/LightofXRoad

My daughter is 2 and a half and month after month bedtime is getting harder and harder. When she was younger it took around 45 minuites, then it started taking an hour now we are almost up to 3 hours for bedtime routine and its getting frustrating. Takes longer to wind her down, she cries and gets upset at more and more things, more books, more this, more that, another trip to the bathroom despite me asking before we go to bed its infuriating.

I try to set boundaries and say stuff like "this is the last book and then bedtime" repeat it 4 or 5 times and she says yes and she understands each time and then after said book massive mental breakdown and crying and wont lie back down.

How many more years of this does it take before this becomes easier? We try and do the exact same routine every night for consistency and make her as comfortable and stress free as possible and it only gets worse and worse and worse. We tried putting down harder boundaries and she cried and screamed so badly we almost had to take her to the hospital for hyperventilating and panic attacks because we told her no... like... what the fuck how did we survive as a species?

EDIT: i have read all the comments and I think the consensus is generally the same I have to A) sleep train and set firmer boundaries even if she cries B) drop the naps or C) do both... thanks for all the advice going to discuss with my wife and see what to do

Can anyone point me to a tutorial of anything on how to properly upload animation? I have been trying for a while and im constantly getting stuck... either I have to many files (past the 150) to upload or if they are under 150 the file sizes are to large... or the GIF itself is to large even after undergoing mass compression and insane quality loss.... how do people do it? Also if I DO manage to get it under the right file size then the frame rate is awful... even if my source file isnt like that...

Any help would be appreciated I have been hard stuck on this for hours... i just want to post and move on with my life not do advanced algebra just to upload a gif...

So I have been a father now for about 2 and a half years to my daughter who i love very very much but im struggling so much with my own mental and everything im not sure what to do. I try my hardest for my family, work as much as I can, try to be around as best as I can but it feels like its never enough and I hit a breaking point again, its happened a few times over the past two and a half years.

Recently over the past few months I am constantly fighting with this creature who I should love but makes me want to jump off a bridge. Everything is "No, No, No" I have to fight her to do almost anything we need to do, I give her options, I give her rewards, I try to be a good father and try and give her autonomy over choices. I have taken as much parenting advice I can read to help and it gets me nowhere which causes me to become extremely angry and frustraited. I know this is "normal" but god i cant take it alot of the time, nothing makes sense, theres no logic, no reason... she doesnt have the brain power for somthing like those concepts yet but that fact doesnt give me any comfort it just makes me more frustraited.

I am the sole parent who puts my daughter to sleep for bed and for naps. (This is due to me and my wifes work schedule and how to make things fair for her) and when she doesnt sleep or nap my anger has overtaken me a few times because nothing makes me more upset than fighting that battle. Her failure to sleep means all my own tiny shread of free time vanishes, I cant spend time I promised with my friends, I cant take back the tiny tiny island of what life used to be like which I need for my mental when she refuses to sleep. When it happens I go to my wife to get her to take over so I can blow off steam which is usually punching the shit out of a bed in the other room and screaming into a pillow trying to vent all my anger away from family, though her taking over is already a fail state for the night and everything is ruined for the night anyway. However a few times like now it got out of control, 2 hours of neither of us being able to put her to sleep and I lost my temper... I know I shouldn't have, I know its wrong, im terrible for doing it but what's done is done... I stormed in a yelled at my daughter, I spanked her for not going to sleep, I knocked over a liquid by mistake and made a mess and the entire situation got me so angry I slamed my fist into the door... I feel horrid after, my wife crying, my daughter scared of me and HER trying to comfort my wife to stop crying... I feel like I shouldn't exsist anymore or never have to begin with I just dont know what to do. I apologized almost imidately and again 30 min later when we were alone, but the damage was dealt I cant take whats already done back, I want to stop being like this but I cant seem to contain or control my anger.

This isnt a frequent occurrence, last time somthing similar happened not to this extent was probably 10 months ago ish but the results and fallout is devistating, i desprately dont want to keep repeating my mistakes but its so hard. My father had anger issues and I hated him for it and didnt want to be like him, awesome I failed to prevent being like him. Im just so tiered and so stressed and feel so trapped and alone so often. Im fairly sure my wife hasn't really liked me for a long time but tolerates me because our daughter loves me (most of the time) and she cant provide for her alone... I know the first thing anyone who reads this is going to say "therapy" I dont know how to get that, I live in the middle of no where with no resources and dont have the money to pay for it. Driving to a town for paid therapy is simply not an option for us, my wife would have more problems with it than me due 1)cost and 2)it means she doesnt wind up getting time away from our daughter or a break. People will say online therapy but I dont know how to go about that without getting scammed or idk and again I worry about cost, its not somthing we can afford so I feel so trapped and im terrified to even bring it up to her, shes super against that sort of thing.

I dont know what to do, I feel so trapped and awful so often and I dont want to be like this but I am... anyone saying "figure it out" will just get ignored.. I just don't want to feel so alone and so awful