u/Lost_Highlight3122

Hey! Since a few months i’ve been having crazy anxiety and panic attacks, but lately is when it all started to feel like a rollercoaster. A few days ago i was almost at the edge of sleeping, feeling really calm. The sound of the door distracted me and that’s when i thought that i was dying, that i couldn’t feel that calm. I started crying and having a panic attack and derealization. Just 30 minutes ago, it happened again, but this time i was already sleeping. I was dreaming when all of a sudden i wake up with this “im going to die” feeling, a tight chest and crying. I just want to know if this has happened to anyone else, and if anxiety was the cause or it was another thing. Please any help is appreciated

Hi i’m a 16F and i’ve been scared of death for as long i can remember. When i started school at 3, i would cry before going into class because i thought that my mom would die while i was at school. At 8, i started crying at nights, scared of losing my mom and my grandma. But the worst it that it keeps going. That fear of losing a loved one became the fear of dying, stop existing, being sick, etc.

My graduation was at june and a few days before i started having this really bad panic attacks. My mom told me that it was because it was a big moment in my life and that feeling just came along with it. I thought the same too, because right after my graduation, it stopped.

But at july, it came back and worse than ever. July 17 i had to go to the hospital because i was having a big anxiety/panic attack and i couldn’t stop spiralling. It hasn’t stop since then, one days i feel better, other days worse but it doesn’t fully stop.

This month of august i’ve been also dealing with desrealization, i feel like everything it’s fake and it just makes me go crazier. It happens always at night. But last night it happened heavy, i was almost sleeping when i suddenly woke up by the sound of the door. Then i realised that i was really calm, like a good calm feeling, and i started thinking that it was because i was going to die. I stood up and my legs were trembling, when i touched my fingers, i felt them weird. I started crying heavily and woke up my mom. I ended up relaxing but still afraid of sleeping. I just stop feeling scared when the sun had already rise. Then, i slept and woke up 2-3 times, and then going back to sleep. It thought that was the end of it, but when i woke up, i had the same feeling as last night.

I’m scared of dying while sleeping or having an illness which i’m not aware of. I have an appointment in 30 minutes to tell all of this to the doctor, but i feel like i’m still in the danger zone and that i could die tonight or tomorrow or soon, even if it’s not true.

Please help me because it’s been keeping me away from doing a lot of things i love. (Sorry for any mistakes or typos, english isn’t my first language)