u/Lost_Sugar_78

We're in the process of planning and I feel like I don't know how to dress on a regular day let alone my own wedding.

I was never the type of person to dream about what my future wedding would look like, so I have no childhood dreams to lean on here.

I've also attended all of 3 weddings. As the child of immigrants, we had no family here so I only attended a few friends' weddings as an adult, and don't have much real life experience to lean on.

I have also realized my self image is... Outdated is the best way I can put it. I've gained weight in the last decade, gotten more masc and started T. My body isn't the shape I remember it being and my face isn't as feminine as it was back then. None of this is negative, in fact I'm happy about it in general, it's just that I feel like I haven't put up a new photo in the spot labeled "self image" in my mind, but I know it's inaccurate.

As a result I have trouble knowing what clothing might look flattering on my body. I feel like plus sized women's clothing looks better on plus sized women than plus sized men's clothing looks on plus sized men, y'know? Like the women's fashion industry always works harder on women's clothes (and ofc plus sized options are more limited, but there are still more/better ones for women than men). At the same time I still have hips so men's pants don't fit/look good, and a sizeable bust so men's tops don't sit right either. I don't like binding to appear my flat either (no issues with appearing more flat, just prefer to actually be able to breathe and the size means I never get really well flattened anyway).

But my face doesn't look good in women's clothing at this point either. It's a decidedly masculine face despite my inability to grow more than 5 scraggly beard hairs

I'm open to a bespoke outfit, but I'm not sure a suit is what I want. The closest thing I have to "I want to wear this for my wedding" was my prom dress, haha. But again, that's not my body or face anymore, not my gender presentation.

Any suggestions (more for general inspo than specific pieces/designers, I need to understand the vibe before picking pieces)? My partner is going to be in a traditionally femme bridal dress.

Edit: stills here https://imgur.com/a/qfPL3aZ

Idk if it's possibly to extract stills worth a damn from this video, but the bottom half (below the waist?) is all black and the top has like 2 stripes of yellow?

I'm pretty sure they're living in my walls because I keep finding them upstairs (bedroom closet, bathroom, hallway) which is a strange place. If they were coming in through the doggy door downstairs would make more sense but we never see/hear them down there unlike flys for example.

Google says maybe Eastern Carpenter. I'd like to know what to do and who to call if anyone has advice.

If you're the first vote, obviously you have no information, and if you're the last you have perfect information. Somewhere in between you feel like your vote might make a difference.

What are the scenarios in which you'd vote each colour?

If you're normally a blue voter but you're also the last vote and blue has lost, do you save yourself or go down with the ship knowing it won't make a difference?

If you're near the end and it's close but the rest of the voters after you could swing the tide one way or the other, how would you vote?

If you're the first voter, what do you choose?

I personally think in this situation red is more likely to win if the first person chooses red. Each subsequent voter sees there isn't anyone to save yet, so they would just be jumping overboard to ask others to take the risk to save them. but perhaps someone along the line thinks differently and says "There will be other blue voters in future, I'll support saving them."

Need to replace the shortest run of fence on the property (in a city, in Ontario). The long runs have each been done with the neighbours on either side in the last couple years, one side with 6x6 posts sunk in fresh post holes files with concrete, the other side with 4x4 in existing saddles, just the posts replaced above ground.

4ft below the ground is standard here for frost, and my soil is mostly clay. ~25ft run, planning to tie into the existing posts on either side. Will need to dig two new post holes.

Debating sinking the wood directly into the holes with concrete (with or without that protective envelope thing?) vs using saddles for the two remaining posts (planning to do 6x6 due to area to be covered).