Help with severe separation anxiety in our 5-month-old poodle – looking for advice
We have a 5-month-old male miniature poodle, and we’re really struggling with what seems to be quite severe separation anxiety. We would really appreciate advice from anyone who has experienced something similar, especially with a poodle.
The problem has gradually become more noticeable, and at this point he has an extremely hard time being separated from either of us.
He starts whining and barking if one of us simply goes into another room and closes the door, even though the other person is still at home with him. We can’t close the bathroom door if one of us is home alone with him without him becoming distressed.
Leaving the apartment without him has been even harder. We have a camera, and we have tried very short absences, but he notices immediately when we leave and starts whining/barking. We have not been able to make meaningful progress with actually leaving the apartment.
Mornings are particularly difficult. On the days when I have to go to work, he becomes extremely anxious as soon as our morning routine starts. He follows me closely around the apartment and is basically glued to my feet because he seems to know that I might leave. He whines, watches me constantly, and often stands by the front door.
He comes with me to work two days a week, while on the other days he stays home with my husband. We have started using verbal cues to make the day more predictable for him: on home days we say, “Today you’re staying home,” and on office days we say, “Today you’re coming to work.” We then use different equipment (collar for home days, harness for work days) and try to keep the routines consistent so he can learn what to expect.
We have also been practicing all the usual pre-departure cues without actually leaving: putting on shoes, picking up keys, touching the door handle, getting ready for work, etc. We have tried very short separation intervals as well, but he becomes anxious almost immediately, so we feel like we are not making any progress.
A crate is not an option for us, as crate use is restricted by law in the country where we live, so we are looking for solutions that don’t involve crate training.
We are not trying to use cry-it-out and we don’t want to push him into prolonged distress. We want to help him feel safe and gradually learn that separation is okay.
Has anyone experienced this level of separation anxiety with a young poodle?
How did you approach the training?
Did you start with something even easier than leaving the room?
How long did it take before you saw progress?
Are there any poodle-specific things we should know?
Would you recommend working with a behaviorist at this point?
We would really appreciate any advice or experiences. We’re feeling quite stuck and want to make sure we’re approaching this in the right way. ❤️