u/ManagerDisastrous958

TL;DR- My roommate is like the girl in the movie obsession, thinking of changing my room.

My roommate is a year senior to me. She is squint eyed and has a lot of medical issues. I felt bad for her and thought she was a nice person until I realised it was all a facade. She is extremely rude and cunning. She keeps gaslighting and manipulating me until I act according to her wish.

I'll give a simple example: I just want to study but she has been staying in room because I stay to study. But that's not out of love it's for possession and control. She keeps staring at me. Even if I am studying she wants me to look at her and keep giving her attention if I don't, she'll call her friends, or family and her family is weird as well. She flips the camera to me during a video call without caring even a little or telling me about it. She just wants me to look bad because I'd be doing something of my own after I get angry at her for pestering me. If I concentrate on my studies she bangs on the table or starts shaking her body to make me look at her every 5 minutes I can't afford to do that. I can't study like that so one day, I sat facing my back towards her. She cried that day. Then she kept gaslighting and manipulating me. When I felt this is not how want to study, I left for study room in my hostel. She kept asking why am I going, I told her to study. She then asked "how come you increased your study hours". I said, well I study like this, I just wasn't studying like this for a while in the beginning. She started snooping on my phone, bag and things. Then she kept asking to my friend if I go there all the time. She said yes, then she snooped in her room to check if I was there. Then she asked her where the study room is, she doesn't know. So, she said I will by hook or crook find it then gave an explaination that she needs to study well at night on somedays however, she told me she'll never go to study room when I was planning to and made fun of my choice to go to study room to study. Each time I go to study room, it's probably been more than a month yet, she always asks me with an extremely judgy and surprised tone "YoU ArE GoInG tO ThE StUdY RoOm???" I am feed up saying it everyday like I am doing a crime. So I finally told her today, why do you keep asking the same question everyday like it's a surprise? She always has cunning replies so, I was prepared. She said yeah because I thought you were going because of your exams. I said, I have already told you multiple times I am not only going for exams. I study like that usually. Then, she starts manipulating me saying you never said that. I got so angry when she tried to manipulate my reality again! That bursted out saying I have told you multiple times, she says no, you just said you were comfortable studying there because that's the only message on WhatsApp I sent regarding it. I told her ask Liza (a common friend who is her junior) and she judgily says LiZa?!?!? I said yes, I have said it in front of her as well. Only then she shut herself up and I left for study room but good damn the struggle for each and everything I choose to do is crazy. It's like she wants me to ask for permission on what I do. Like wtf? She does whatever she wants but I stay minion to her? She is a single child plus has so many disabilities which is why she is used to such a treatment but she chose to come to a hostel she cannot expect to stay in a hostel and be treated like her parents pamper her even though she controls me and never cares for me rather shows dominance over me.

I have a weird kind of phobia. I get disturbed by a continuous pace (like a 5km/hr speed) of motion and speech. I even used to have nightmares where everyone is creepily smiling at the same seemingly slow but fast pace and talking, moving then grabing me. Is there a word for it? Or does anyone have this?

I just faced it now. I am in a reading room and some people are on the same online call which is echoing from different parts of the room and the speaker is also here. Then, a lot of people are laughing loudly or muttering something. I started having a panic attack until I took some deep breaths.

If everything is meaningless and questionable according to postmodernism and deconstruction then what is the point of deconstructing and taking a postmodernist take?

If a person has to write a paper to analyse using postmodernist lens isn't the person still following regulations, time constraints, and hierarchies that postmodernism breaks?

Is it ever possible for postmodernism to be applied in real life without being utopic or dystopic?

What I mean to say is that deconstruction itself contructs what it means.

What I am thinking needs to be refined by reading, isn't reading words meaning I follow the rules of the language that signify a meaning? And the act of the disciplined and consistent reading also a rule to follow to be informed about deconstruction to deconstruct?

If you have anything in your mind do share.

Hello, I might sound crazy but can you help me recall things we did in school like every way we were discipline in school? I want to do everything we used to do in school you can give your perspective as a teacher, parent, student, ex-student or any other roles associated with school or anything you remember. I want to know them because I am realising we all are having digital amnesia, we don't work like before with the dedication and focus. The bare mimimum has become a revolutionary idea like "reward yourself" or "eat the frog". It has been normalised so much by the design of social media to shorten the attention span to few seconds incapacitating to do most of the basic cognitive functions like memorising, focusing, thinking, imagining, being disciplined etc. Even our memes have normalised such behaviour like "3 am crying on the bed"- we used to like to read bedtime stories if couldn't sleep and then dream, " I take 50min break for 5min work" like we could have flaunted that when we were in school, "I ain't reading the long message" - that "long" message would be a 50 word message while we could read novels. On the other hand the very polished parts of everything shown in social media without telling the practical process of it most advice begin and end with just take 2 minutes to do it. How to do it, when to increase your time, when to know you are going wrong or right nothing is told that frequently.

This is the reason why I think it is important for us to remember who we were and what we could do to level up from there.

This is what I remember about school: starting from getting ready neat and tidy to go to school at 6. Then, going to the assembly for prayers, thoughts, news and sometimes some co-circular activities. Then studying according to the periods given. The black board had the date, day and timetable and a thought or affirmation mentioned all these were also noted in our diary and notebooks. The notes written were using blue mostly and black pen for heading and questions. We made annotations on our books using pencil. Rough notebooks were extremely important for all the practice and self study we did. Remembered keywords and mnemonics to make it easier for us to explain our answer. We had the soft board charts like the star chart with green and black stars for reward and punishment. We sat on a desk and bench to study. The healthy diet we had in our tiffins. The participation we did. The reading we did before the class was taken and asked doubts. The punishments for talking during class or misbehaving. We also got stickers (when we were young) and remarks on our copies along with the signature and corrections. We had to rewrite the corrections after our notes.

You can add anything that was unique in your school or you think should have been a part of school. Like I think we should have gone for visits more often to understand concepts or shown pictures, videos, models or real things.

Hey guys, I am in college. I always wanted to go back to school and read everything again taught in school. Since, I didn't get full marks for each and every subject and moved on with further studies after that.

I want to study everything taught in school properly again. I will spend sometime of my schedule relearn. Could you suggest me where can I find old cbse and icse textbooks? I remember there was an NCERT or CBSE app that had all the textbooks I don't know if it still has older textbooks. I will then come to the current textbooks to update my knowledge.

Are there any good youtube channels that you recommend that can assist in understanding better?

Any other tricks, tips, etc would be appreciated as well. I remember some rear not so pompous studious friends who made studying so fun. They had some tricks they used almost like they were using their motor memory. 😄

I am naive to these things. I don't understand why do we need to criticise someone else's opinions so harshly while keeping another opinion. Everyone is entitled to an opinion. Why do we debate? If it is just to strengthen our own opinions I get it. But, I do not like how just discussions can also lead to hostility and mockery of other's opinions. I am confused...

I don't want to be a burden to anyone no more. I just want to change by myself using visualisation, negetive reinforcement (punishing myself) or whatever could work.

It was common known to us that smartphones and social media are threats to us. But nowadays, the usage has been so normalised that if someone does not use it, they are ostricised. Even work needs you to use emails, whatsapp and sometimes facebook and instagram as well! Thus, symptoms of overuse has become common: attention deficiency, depression, anxiety attacks, irrtability, lack of productivity, lack of focus, echo chambers of opinions that lead to intolerance to diverse opinions, following mis/dis-information, and memory issues. Focus and memory issues are my key concern. I can't remember things to a point it has become errie to me. I want to recall the life we had without all these smartphones and social media. The major and minor shifts that have accumulated into a different lifestyle and identity. I mean how did we talk to strangers and make friends genuinely? Not looked at our phones every 5 seconds specially in a queue or lift? How were we dedicated to read so much? Do you remember how was it like? Any anecdotes or general idea works. Also, if you know of any movie, series or video that shows the lifestyle before the smartphone addicted culture, please do share. How are the toppers managing to use phone since it is required for important messages yet you still need to work hard and smartly?

Correct me if I am wrong, each age had a theory or ism. All of them exist or can be interpreted as existing together right? Think of it like a symphony. The New Critic is focusing on the violin, the Marxist is looking at who paid for the instruments, and the Structuralist is looking at the sheet music. They are all hearing the same song, just describing different vibrations. The same is true for structuralism and postmodernism. If there is no structure you cannot function and if it's too structured there is no space to be human. I am going crazy thinking about some thoughts like these please help me out.