My Orientation/Gender

So, for a longer time I used to think I was trans (mtf) and bisexual. I got over it, labelled it as a ‘phase’, or ‘hormone confusion’, but now it’s been a longer time and I think I’ve figured it out better.

First of all, I really like women’s clothing. I used to wear white pantyhose for a long period when I was younger, (we’re talking about years here) because I really liked tight clothes. I kinda miss them. I also find dresses and skirts really comfortable, and wish I could dress more feminine and freely. So I’m defintly a femboy, I figured out, and I was find with that for some time. But recently I had the thought that I enjoy playing female characters. Pretending I’m on a woman, I feel like I can express some sides of myself more freely when stepping into another role. I also talk way more unfiltered, which is super nice for someone who has a lot of thoughts going on in my head. And I mean a lot. But that’s a topic for another time.

I’ve also always read my own text with a girl’s voice? (I’m doing it in this very moment.) I like when people misgender me, though I do often corect them. (Mostly if it’s in an argument and they label me as ‘gal’ or ‘bitch’, or smth like that.) I feel like I’m another side of myself here. ‘Mayorv’ is a wholly different, more exppresive and honest side of me, that I pull on when I need to be social. I love her, and often wish I could be here. But I also really like my masculinity. I like being a guy, a dude and a man. If I had the choice to change gender permanently, I wouldn’t do it.

My Sexuality

As I mentioned in the start, I used to think I was bisexual. Now this is a bit personal, but I feel like I need to share it in order to explain properly.

Warning: Mentioning of gooning and sexual appeals. (Just in case.)

I recently, like, a few days ago, was enjoying myself. But as I did, I noticed that I felt more attracted to the dude in the moment, and kinda wanted him to go on me rather than her. I began focusing on his lips his movement, ect. And I went off to that, which I felt quite satisfied with. After a bit of time, when post nut clarify took in, I felt… Neutral about it. Not weirded or grossed out, but just didn’t find him attractive anymore.

I originaly thought I liked men because I could vividly imagine, and kind of enjoy, the thought of sucking a dick, though got grossed out a moment after. I also really liked men’s warm, large and strong chests. (Not saying men in general have) which I honestly found superior to boobs, and still do. Now I’m troughly enjoying the thought of sucking dick, for some reason, withouth being grossed out. I don’t want it in my ass, tho, but I’ve never been attracted to that in general.

The NSFW talk is over from this point on.

So in short, I don’t know what I am, or what I want to be, really. And it really bugs me, so I thought I’d ask the expert. (I’m prolly cross-posting this, but I’m reffering to the people in r/LGBTeens. Nice pun, btw.) I don’t wanna be told ‘you don’t need to think about that right now’ or ‘you can be whatever you want, don’t worry,’ and ‘you’ll figure it out eventualy’.

I want to figure it out now! I want to know, and I’d prefer to do it early on, rather than go around with all this mess in my head for five years on or so.

That was all. Feel free to ask questions. My DM’s are closed, so come in the comment.

I shouldn’t need to say this, but DO NOT post pictures of your face online. We have an exception for people who are eighteen+, but that’s a minority in teenage subs anyway.

I’m fucking tired of having to deal with this every single say, the sub has become a shithole for people who are insecure. YOU ARE NOT UGLY, YOU DO NOT NEED VALIDATION FROM PEOPLE ONLINE, AND IF YOU HAVE A WEIGHT PROBLEM THEN GO TO AN EXPERT OR SEARCH UP PROPER SOURCES.

I will look into setting up a filter. Cheers.