u/Mediocre_Record8180

I've been working in recruiting for over ten years. We know you're not going to be 100% honest about everything. And honestly? We don't always care. There are things that are better left unsaid or... Said differently.

Think of the interview more like a first date than a court testimony. You're both trying to see if there's a match, and you're both presenting the best version of yourselves. It's a sales pitch, and the product is you. We expect a little bit of polishing. These are the things that we, as recruiters, know you're probably embellishing, and we're okay with it.

1. Your previous salary. Let's start with the most obvious one. The company's goal is to get the best talent at the best price. Your goal is to get the best salary for your skills. These two goals are in direct opposition. When we ask you what you were earning, we're trying to start the negotiation from a low number. Don't give us a number; talk about the salary range you're targeting for this new job, based on your skills and market value.

2. Why you really left your job. Never, ever speak badly about your old company, your manager, or your team. Even if it was a toxic place with endless problems. All we hear is negative energy and drama, and we'll assume you'll bring that with you here. The real reason might be that your manager was an annoying micromanager, but what we should hear from you is that you're 'looking for a role with more growth opportunities' or 'seeking a new challenge'.

3 - How you feel about your old manager. Look, we've all had nightmare bosses. It's a universal experience. But the interview is not the time for this therapy session. Complaining about a former manager is a huge red flag. It makes us wonder if you're the difficult one, who can't handle authority or feedback. Stay professional and neutral, always.

4 - Where you see yourself in 3-5 years. The classic question. We know you might want to take my job, start your own company, or be living on a beach in Costa Rica in a few years. We don't need to know your deep life plan. We just need to hear that you plan to stay with us long enough to make hiring you a good investment. Talk about wanting to master your role, take on more responsibilities, and grow with the company. That's the right answer, even if it's not the whole truth.

5 - How much credit you take for yourself. I see a lot of talented people downplay their achievements. They say things like, 'Well, it was a team effort,' which is nice, but it doesn't tell me anything about *your* specific contribution. Don't be shy. Frame it differently. Talk about the challenge the *team* faced, and then talk about the role *you* played in reaching the solution. 'I was responsible for X, which led to result Y for the team.' This shows you're a team player without erasing your personal value.

Look, it's not about being a liar. It's all about understanding the game. The interview is a performance where you're selling the best professional version of yourself.

Be confident, know your worth, and don't be afraid to tell your story in the best possible light. Someone out there needs exactly what you have to offer, so make it easy for them to see it.

I've been working at my organization for 6 years, and the salary is good. The benefits are honestly very respectable. But there have been some big issues for a while that have been draining me.

A few years ago, I was asked if I'd be willing to step in as a scrum master at work after the person who had been in that role moved into a program manager position. I agreed because it felt like a good opportunity to grow and develop. The problem is that I was going to do scrum master duties part time while still keeping the same role I'd been doing for years.

At first it was exhausting, and that was expected, but even now I'm still doing my old job almost full-time. I'm getting more work done than colleagues who have the same title as me and don't have scrum master responsibilities on top of their work. I told my manager that I felt I'd done excellent work and that I deserved a promotion, because my salary is still tied to my original title... Which pays less than a scrum master. And for 3 review cycles now, my raise has either been the same as my colleague who only has one role or lower than his. He also started here a few years after me, and our salaries are almost the same.

Promotions were announced over the last few weeks, and I didn't get one. People I know are barely getting by at work got promoted, and I'm still sitting in the same place with the same base salary and no meaningful increase.

On top of all that, I've been covering for other coworkers. We work in tech, and my manager hired someone he clearly feels comfortable with personally. The problem is that this person is genuinely bad at the job sometimes. I tried to bring it up with my manager, but he brushed it off and seemed annoyed that I had even said anything. Now I'm carrying parts of that person's responsibilities because he can't handle his workload, and my manager knows it. He knows customers have complained about him and refused to work with him, so I find myself dealing with his customers alongside my own.

My manager and I were talking on a call at the beginning of this month, and I told him I was committed to the role, that I love the company, and that I wanted to stay. I even told him I could see myself working here for another 8 years.

And then I saw the list of promotions and honestly cried. I've been getting truly excellent reviews for years, but people who constantly get complained about were promoted before me. People have literally asked me, "Wait, how long has it been since you got a promotion?"

I updated my resume almost immediately after seeing the list, and now I've found a job posting I want to apply for.

My concern is that I just told my manager one thing, and now I'm basically doing the opposite. I feel like they don't see me as important, and "advocating for myself" clearly hasn't made much of a difference.

Will I look bad to anyone other than my manager if I leave? Especially after telling him I wanted to stay and then changing my mind?

There are a lot of people who work hard and put in real effort who will probably be upset by this, or assume I have no goal and that I'm lazy. And honestly, there's some truth to that, especially lately.

But I don't really care about having money just for the sake of having money. What I care about is freedom. And I know that in this world, the only realistic way to get there is to have a massive amount of money.

I've done a few internships and went through 2 job interviews, and just seeing the whole work environment makes me feel miserable. Even if the salary was good, the idea of being stuck there drains me.

Right now I'm living off investments, and that covers the bills, but after that there isn't much left. The little I do have is better saved so I can grow it more later. But that "later" still feels so far away.

Working a job would make that process go much faster, but there's something in my mind that would rather disappear into the forest than work a normal job. I honestly don't know how to explain it; I just can't force myself to want that.

I also have no idea what career I might even want to pursue. I just needed to put this thought somewhere. In my head, I find myself defending unemployed people because I understand them, but at the same time I know the bills have to be paid and life doesn't care how you feel.

I wish I could thank every worker keeping the world running, because society needs them. But for me, I'm just not made for work.

I didn't go to college because I didn't want to put that expense on my family. I've been working in kitchens since I was 15, and now I've become a very good line cook at a respectable place in the city.

But recently I've started to feel like this might be the closest thing I'll ever be able to reach to a real career, and honestly I can't stand it. The work hours are exhausting, alcohol is everywhere, I constantly have to deal with disgusting men at work, and my body feels like it's already worn out.

Between everything around me feeling broken right now, and the life I've found myself in, I've become unable to see any meaning in the future. I don't know. Can remote jobs help in a situation like mine, or would I just be swapping one miserable thing for another miserable thing? I'd appreciate any thoughts or advice.