u/Mental_Signature_725

Do you ever just feel like it's all just piling up and on?

My husband left a million projects undone... ive been trying to do them piece by piece. But its a lot for 1 person to do. We live on an acre. It takes a lot of work to do it all. I want to sell our house. Its to big, to much.

Ive worked my butt off for 5 months. Fixing, painting, cleaning, selling crap. Im tired. House went on the market yesterday. It Looks good, the first people through it ripped it to shreds. The neighbor died and im just so tired of everything being so sh*tty. I feel like I lived in a bubble for 10 years and life was wonderful until it wasn't and it literally fell apart and keeps on going. One of my husband friends has helped me a ton. My husband asked my BIL to help me. He has come around 2 times in 6 months. My friend says he does not have the mental capacity to deal with me. The crappy part is if the tables were reversed my husband would be over there every minute of every day. I guess im incredibly sad, let down hurt

I just need to b*tch! My husband died 6 months ago tomorrow. I want & need to put my house up for sale.

My husband was the person every one went to for help. Yet here I am.... I had a whole list of people who were supposed to come help me yesterday and today. But its 730 at night not one person showed. I have cooked lunch & dinner for me and my neighbor her husband is on hospice.

I have put the door frame in. (Had to utube it)

Cleaned out 2 bedrooms. Painted a floor. Cleaned my patio. Lawn mower won't start. Cut trim for my bathroom. Still no help. My sister law barely sent me a text asking how I am. I'm like its been 2 weeks. Everyone knows my house goes on the market july 1st.

I am beyond pissed. Why do I need to ask 3,4 10 when my husband was over there immediately

I had my 30 year retirement party today... it was very surreal. Its hard to think i stayed at my job so we could have a comfortable pension and hes not here to share retirement with. ive been very emotional this week anyway. Its been 6 months since my husband passed. There is a lot that does not seem to matter, nor do I really care about the impact I made on other people's lives. When my life has been falling down around me for the last 9 months. My last day of work in 6-30... first day of retirement is 7-1.... very symbolic to me. My husband's birthday is my first day of retirement- the rest of my life!

Im also putting my house of 25 years up for sale.

Smoking a ham and having a party

Its been 6 months this next week since my husband passed away. We were together 30 years. I have worked for the same place for 28years. I worked for 3 months while he fought his cancer battle. I worked around, chemo, radiation and surgeries. It was rough! I worked through hospice. We needed insurance. Now I can't concentrate, I can't think. I struggle to do anything anymore. I hate my job and better yet I hate people. My co workers were initially great. Now they make snide remarks and are judgemental. Ive decided to retire next month, but I need to be professional until then and its a struggle. #1 why are people nasty... #2 any great ideas how to cope. Ive been attending therapy but its not helping! I want to burn it all down!

I am hitting the 6 month mark with out my husband.

I am struggling. It does not take much to throw me over the edge. I have been struggling to get out of bed. I have no motivation lately, I want to move, I want to sell my house. But just moving forward is a lot. I know in the Grand scheme of things 6 months is not very long. We spent 29 years together.

My husband has been gone 162 days.

Ive been slowly going through his things.

I kept his favorite shirts, his wrangler to make a quilt.

Butttt his boots.. so many kinds... fancy! I debated long and hard about this.

He had a small foot his son, nephew and brothers feet were way to big. So I was talking to our neighbor and his best friend. They had the same size foot. My husband was 6'5" neighbor 5'5" on a good day. He was so damn excited to get those boots. All i can do is sit in the backyard and cry. They went to a great home, he loved my husband. Life is hard sometimes.

I am so tired of all these things

This unwanted journey is crazy. I thought i was doing better. Its only been 6 months... 153 days without him.

I want-need to move. I want to live by my son & grandkids. I don't want to see his company trucks daily. I don't want everyone to feel sorry for me because he is gone. I have a great resentment towards his family. I wont get over it. Im to hurt by there actions. I have so much work to do- I have no motivation to do it. We have lived here 25+ years we have so much stuff... Ive been painting, cleaning and organizing stuff. Im moving to a different state. Today I just feel paralyzed. Paralyzed by life... any inspirational ideas to get me moving

I am 5 months into this crappy journey. I absolutely hate my new life. I am spending every moment, fixing the house, yard, garage, cleaning up messes that seem to explode. There is a lot of absence in my life with my husband gone. Of course I lost friends, family I have obligations that I must do. Most recently i attended a bridal shower. I can say it was an awful experience. But mostly in my mind. I don't think i can attend the wedding. Im not sure how to get out of it. I feel like im just a sinking ship, maybe bouncing around try to stay a float. Im tired of making decisions. Im tired of answering the door, tired of people wanting to help, they have good intentions. Im just exhausted.

I miss him so damn much today. 150 days into this. Its hard to believe i will go the rest of my life with out seeing him. ... its getting better but some days its so dang hard! He brought me flowers every 2 weeks and on mother's day he'd buy me plants to do my outside planters. Today i bought my own last week i bought me roses.

My husband passed December 29th. I work, but i lost 75% of our income when he passed. We have a nice house. I can either afford the house or everything else. I can't afford all of it. I can sell and move by my son and have a very nice life. I will leave everything and every one I know behind. I have worked for my state for 28.9 years. I can buy out the last year and a few months of service. I might already have a job.

Like most of us i feel like I have lost so much already. My future, the love of my life. 29 years of doing it all together.

I sit here in kind of shock & disbelief. When I put pen to paper I know what i need to do. But damn i don't want to. I hate giving & selling all his shit. It breaks my heart every time I do it. I hate his family, I refuse to ask for help. Life is soo damn hard.