u/MerriksSpiceFarm

I'm a Super-Physician, 90% of the trigger pulls I make are to provide life long addiction healing and exhaustion relief. I'm not unfamiliar with our Freedom Armory's Democratic weapons. It's just the FRV's HMG didn't work for me even though I did exactly what the operation manual said.

1. Move to the rear of the FRV.
2. Jump into the Gunner's Hatch with LRM completely piercing lower torso for safety.
3. Position yourself as a soapbox derby racer, misaligned ~45° with the HMG.
4. Left hand should be palm up.
5. Right wrist should be broken 90° to the right.
6. Both hands should look like they are holding invisible ice cream cones.
7. Ensure elbows and knees are hyper extended.
8. If HMG will not turn or fire, keep trying.
9. Use broken and maimed right arm when stimming self in FRV.
10. If stimming self is the only option you have and exit is impossible, keep healing through the agonizing torment and pain until Eagle-1 can deliver a quick painless mercy kill.

I'm not ashamed to admit ignorance. Got any advice for me?

It's another Freedom Friday, Divers! Care to share your best or most recent ragdolls, or dumb ways you died?

This was earlier today, not even 1 minute into the match. It's like I'm fresh out of Boot Camp some missions.

Let's check those boxes...
- Caught off guard by snail-speed enemy in clear view
- Shot by a long Range Cannon marked by myself
- Exfoliated my front side
- Front flip to a bounce to correct lumbar issue, landing comically slow backwards
- Did the opposite of what Neo did
- Tried to helicopter away but wasn't fast enough

And yeah, I'm your Supply and Medic Diver who ate the entire supply of stim darts makes sound decisions but had a teeny tiny oopsie from withdraws from the fascist scenery.

Have a great weekend!

Friend Diver,

During FTL travel to our next mission, please enjoy this Democratic footage of my mostly very unsuccessful applications of the G/SH-39 Shield throwable.

Some are timed well, some may prove my addiction to my medical supplies inattentiveness, the full range.

Still not sure about the Bastion Betty Tank one. Like, damn my mans. Tell me less about Cyberstan and more about those Cybergains.

Have a great week of Freedom, Divers!

- MedicDiver Merrik
SMD / SPharmD / SDC

- - - - - - - - - -

Time Stamps / Titles
Some things happen too quick to see first pass without a title pun.

0:00 - Use your mics
0:15 - Too close
0:20 - Too cold
0:39 - Safe Space
0:55 - Perfect thr... is that Borg juicing?
1:20 - Death is just a means of resupply
1:32 - I can show you Extract - Shining, shimmering, splendid...
1:39 - Upsetting Eagle-1
1:46 - Saved P2, became pinball
1:59 - Hold Position = Throw Bubble
2:16 - Discount Bubbles
2:27 - Quick Reaction Wall
2:34 - Fire, surprise gas, and 80% Off + Fish Flop
2:46 - Denied (Audio doubled/misaligned, sorry)
2:56 - Cheeks Shield

I use the Breakthrough as a safety sometimes to ensure I keep going so my team has supplies and severely addictive narcotics Stims. I call it my Ambulance.

And let me tell you, this beauty eats 500kgs for an appetizer.

The random Diver at the end dying was one funny enough, but the laugh they did on the mic at the end was the only time we heard them make a noise the entire mission.

And what a noise it was. <screams internally>

A new team responsibility for me with the Spore variation has been interrupting the Spore Titans from Spewing. Speargun handles that with ease, up to three at a time if your team can manage.

Bile Titans are immune to all other forms of Stun & Confusion effects, except gas. Go, go now my fellow Medic and Support Divers. Grab your Speargun coated in that non addictive Gas of Justice to free these worlds for our people, and lick it for an insane high good luck before firing.

- AP5 650/275 Gas Damage + 80 Stagger Force + Aoe Confusion
- Excellent range and accurate
- Fast reload considering damage and effects, can be done moving easily
- Can be shot at ground, walls, other Divers, to make a gas cloud for enemies to enjoy
- Scrape a used G-31 Arc grenade case back and forth along the gas coated spear to Hot-Box inside Bastion Tank or FRV, get to see Super Heaven without reinforcements

I honestly find our Democratic Gas Clouds of Freedom to be the far more superior and than the vile and fascist Spore vomit they try to destroy us with.

Only P2 was with me, the other two were random Divers we were honored to have served with.

I've been an avid enjoyed of the Breakthrough. I feel it has added a missing tool to the Support/Medic Diver kit. Huge fan, 9.5/10 Rating, gorgeous. <chefs kiss>

And ummm, as we learn to ride a bike... sometimes we fall. And sometimes other people get hurt because of our intrusive thoughts to try risky and somewhat unneeded maneuvers. And sooooooooometimes that bike is a 16 Ton Mechanical Suit of Destruction. Honestly thought Pelican-1 would budge at bit...

You can actually hear the moment I panicked with disbelief until reality slapped me in the face like an enormous 5m tall 4 ton shield. I knew P2 was safe, but facts vanished momentarily. Doesn't give me a pass for turning the inside of Pelican into a pinball machine until the torso ejected at Railgun speeds out the chute.

Please forgive me, Diver Fantaman. I don't care, Pata. You deserved it somehow.

- (F3 was a good sport and laughed it off, o7)

Edit: I just realized it wasn't Fantaman that died, but my Diver-Partner: Pata. I'll make corrections to the above, lol. This just keeps getting funnier. What the hell is in this Stim Juice?