u/Mistiblue222

I know you’re tired of the poems I write,
Of my sister, my grief, my endless night.
You want something happy, something less blue—
But I can’t write a feeling that simply isn’t true.
You say, “It’s been years, you have to move on,”
But you don’t understand what it means that she’s gone.
She wasn’t just someone I happened to love—
She was my other half, and now she’s above.
You’re tired of reading how badly I ache?
Imagine being me, with no damn escape.
You can close the page when the sadness gets deep—
I close my eyes, and it follows me to sleep.
I wish I could write about laughter and light,
But grief is the language my heart speaks at night.
I’d give anything for happier words to come through—
But every road in my heart still leads back to you.
So if my poems are too painful, don’t read them again.
But please don’t tell me when my grieving should end.
These words are the tears I can’t always cry—
My way of still loving her after goodbye.
Maybe someday joy will return to my pen,
Maybe I’ll learn how to breathe whole again.
But until that day, let my broken heart speak—
Because losing my twin didn’t just make me sad…
It changed me

So I lost my identical, twin sister then my dad died then my stepdad died then my wife died two years ago then my mom died a month ago and my niece died two days later. I have absolutely no one anymore. The grief is killing me physically.

Hi. So I see there is a separate thread for fraternal twins. Could someone start a new community for identical twin loss? I would but don’t know how.

I have lost my identical, twin sister, my dad, my stepdad, my wife, I lost my mom a month ago, and then my niece died two days later. How do I cope with all of this loss and pain? Does anybody have any suggestions on how I can deal with this?

I am going through so much this past year. I’ve lost 7 family members in 7 years and I’m just not myself mentally or emotionally. Now I have to find a place to live. Please pray for me.

Forever Her Twin
She was my mirror, face and soul,
The missing half that made me whole.
Before the world could speak my name,
She stood beside me just the same.
We shared one silence, deep and true,
One knowing glance the whole world knew.
No words were needed to understand—
Her heart was always in my hand.
We felt the same small aches and pain,
Sunshine joy and sorrow’s rain.
Two separate lives for eyes to see,
But one shared soul—just her and me.
She walked through storms I could not see,
Carrying hidden agony.
Yet even then, through darkest night,
Her love for me stayed fierce and bright.
Now quiet lives where laughter grew,
And days feel dim without her view.
No one asks which twin I’ll be—
The world sees one…
but I feel three:
The girl I was,
the grief I bear,
and Christy’s love still living there.
Because a bond like ours won’t end with breath,
It isn’t broken even by death.
She walks with God in perfect light,
While I walk on through day and night.
And when my journey here is through,
The first face heaven shows me…
will be you.
Forever my sister.
Forever my friend.
Forever your twin—
love without end. 

Forever Her Twin
She was my mirror, face and soul,
The missing half that made me whole.
Before the world could speak my name,
She stood beside me just the same.
We shared one silence, deep and true,
One knowing glance the whole world knew.
No words were needed to understand—
Her heart was always in my hand.
We felt the same small aches and pain,
Sunshine joy and sorrow’s rain.
Two separate lives for eyes to see,
But one shared soul—just her and me.
She walked through storms I could not see,
Carrying hidden agony.
Yet even then, through darkest night,
Her love for me stayed fierce and bright.
Now quiet lives where laughter grew,
And days feel dim without her view.
No one asks which twin I’ll be—
The world sees one…
but I feel three:
The girl I was,
the grief I bear,
and Christy’s love still living there.
Because a bond like ours won’t end with breath,
It isn’t broken even by death.
She walks with God in perfect light,
While I walk on through day and night.
And when my journey here is through,
The first face heaven shows me…
will be you.
Forever my sister.
Forever my friend.
Forever your twin—
love without end. 

**Born a Set**
I wasn’t born to walk alone;
We shared one heartbeat, flesh and bone.
The world first saw us, side by side—
Two souls who never learned divide.
We laughed the same, we cried the same,
The fire inside us burned one flame.
She knew my thoughts before I’d speak;
When I was strong, she wasn’t weak.
Then death kicked in without a sound,
And left my whole world in the ground.
It didn’t take just one away—
It stole the light from every day.
Now torture wears my face each dawn;
I wake… but nothing carries on.
The sun still rises, cold and numb,
While all I ask is, “Why this one?”
My family vanished one by one;
Each goodbye fired another gun.
The echoes rattle through my chest,
And grief won’t let my spirit rest.
I’m barely hanging by a thread,
A living soul that feels half dead.
I smile because that’s what’s required,
But every breath feels bruised and tired.
They tell me, “Time will ease the ache.”
What cruel mistake those people make.
Time never stitched my shattered seams;
It only taught me how to scream…
…without a sound.
Because the loudest cries are those
That nobody around you knows.
Who am I now? I can’t explain.
I’m just the shadow of her name.
We came as one, a matched design;
Now I’m expected to define
A woman I have never known—
An only child in borrowed bones.
I search the mirror every day,
But half the face has gone away.
I didn’t lose a sister’s hand;
I lost the map of who I am.
The compass of my heart was her;
Now every road is just a blur.
Still somewhere underneath this pain,
Beneath the loss, beneath the rain,
A tiny ember softly glows—
The love that only Heaven knows.
So though my knees may shake with grief,
And every breath feels far too brief,
I’ll carry her until I’m through…
Because they buried half of me…
But they could never bury **you**.

Born a Set
I wasn’t born to walk alone;
We shared one heartbeat, flesh and bone.
The world first saw us, side by side—
Two souls who never learned divide.
We laughed the same, we cried the same,
The fire inside us burned one flame.
She knew my thoughts before I’d speak;
When I was strong, she wasn’t weak.
Then death kicked in without a sound,
And left my whole world in the ground.
It didn’t take just one away—
It stole the light from every day.
Now torture wears my face each dawn;
I wake… but nothing carries on.
The sun still rises, cold and numb,
While all I ask is, “Why this one?”
My family vanished one by one;
Each goodbye fired another gun.
The echoes rattle through my chest,
And grief won’t let my spirit rest.
I’m barely hanging by a thread,
A living soul that feels half dead.
I smile because that’s what’s required,
But every breath feels bruised and tired.
They tell me, “Time will ease the ache.”
What cruel mistake those people make.
Time never stitched my shattered seams;
It only taught me how to scream…
…without a sound.
Because the loudest cries are those
That nobody around you knows.
Who am I now? I can’t explain.
I’m just the shadow of her name.
We came as one, a matched design;
Now I’m expected to define
A woman I have never known—
An only child in borrowed bones.
I search the mirror every day,
But half the face has gone away.
I didn’t lose a sister’s hand;
I lost the map of who I am.
The compass of my heart was her;
Now every road is just a blur.
Still somewhere underneath this pain,
Beneath the loss, beneath the rain,
A tiny ember softly glows—
The love that only Heaven knows.
So though my knees may shake with grief,
And every breath feels far too brief,
I’ll carry her until I’m through…
Because they buried half of me…
But they could never bury you.

**My First Friend**
Before the world had known my name, you held my tiny hand,
My first best friend, my childhood soul, the only one who’d understand.
We laughed beneath the summer sun, through every joy and bend,
I never dreamed that death would steal my very first best friend.
One heartbeat split in two at birth, one soul in different skin,
Now half of me keeps breathing here… the other lives with Him.
No one can replace the bond we built from our very first day,
Because when God called you to Heaven, He took part of me away.
I’ll carry you until we meet where tears can never fall,
For my first friend was always you… my twin, my heart, my all.

Does anyone feel regret because you’re the one that is still alive and your twin isn’t.? I have such deep remorse that my God took my Twin instead of me and it’s breaking me to the core. We were born a set two broken from one cell. How can God take a twin from their twin? I am very angry and still cannot comprehend my Twin’s death. I need help. And yes, I see a psychiatrist and a therapist and it’s not working. I’m on medication’s and I have no family left to talk to.

My First Friend
Before the world had known my name, you held my tiny hand,
My first best friend, my childhood soul, the only one who’d understand.
We laughed beneath the summer sun, through every joy and bend,
I never dreamed that death would steal my very first best friend.
One heartbeat split in two at birth, one soul in different skin,
Now half of me keeps breathing here… the other lives with Him.
No one can replace the bond we built from our very first day,
Because when God called you to Heaven, He took part of me away.
I’ll carry you until we meet where tears can never fall,
For my first friend was always you… my twin, my heart, my all.

Please help let me know if this is good

The world saw labels, shame, and blame,

They spoke my failures, called my name.

They judged the roads I'd wandered through,

But they never saw the soul they knew.

You looked beyond the smoke and pain,

Beyond the losses I couldn't explain.

You saw the tears I'd tried to hide,

And never once left my side.

You didn't love me because I was strong,

You loved me when everything went wrong.

When I stumbled, you reached for me,

Reminding me who I could still be.

You never said that I was lost,

Or measured me by addiction's cost.

You saw a heart still worth the fight,

A flickering flame, a fading light.

When grief had stolen half my soul,

And I no longer felt whole,

You became a quiet place to land,

A steady heart, an outstretched hand.

One day these chains will lose their hold,

This story won't end the way it's told.

Because your love has helped me see

The person God still made in me.

So if I stand again one day,

And finally find a brighter way,

Part of that victory will always be true—

I found the strength because God loved me...

And because He chose to love me through you.

​

Half of a Whole

I used to walk this world in twos,

Two shadows stretching in our shoes,

Two laughs that echoed down the hall,

Two voices answering every call.

We shared a face, a crooked grin,

The same wild storm beneath our skin,

A secret language, soft and fast—

A promise that our bond would last.

But promises can’t fight a ghost,

And drugs can steal the ones we love the most.

One phone call split the sky in two—

Now half the world is missing you.

They said “overdose” like just a word,

Like thunder distant, barely heard.

But I felt lightning crack my chest,

And grief moved in and built a nest.

Because you weren’t just family, you were me,

My mirror, my symmetry.

The one who knew my silent pain,

The one who danced inside my brain.

Now mornings come and feel half-made,

Like someone stole the sun and shade.

I stare at mirrors, lost and thin—

Not sure which half of me is mine within.

Who am I without your voice?

Without our jokes, our reckless choice?

Without your hand to guide my way

When life got hard and skies went gray?

My life’s a room with pieces thrown,

A house that doesn’t feel like home.

Bills and worries crowd the floor,

Dreams we once had—shut in a drawer.

I need to fix it, build it right,

But grief has stolen all my sight.

The map we drew is torn apart…

You took the compass from my heart.

Some nights I whisper to the air,

As if your spirit’s lingering there.

“Tell me, sis, where do I start?

How do I live with half a heart?”

And in the quiet, soft but clear,

I swear your laughter still appears.

Not loud, not bright, not like before—

But just enough to crack the door.

Maybe I’m not meant to be

The girl I was when you were with me.

Maybe this broken, shaking start

Is how I build a braver heart.

Maybe the road is mine to see,

Not half of you—but all of me.

And though the ache will never end,

Your love is stitched beneath my skin.

So I’ll pick up one small piece today,

Just one lost shard along the way.

A step, a breath, a fragile start—

With you still living in my heart.

Because twins like us don’t break apart,

Even death can’t split that art.

You’re gone from sight, but not from me…

I’m still your half.

You’re still my symmetry. 

​

Half of a Whole

I used to walk this world in twos,

Two shadows stretching in our shoes,

Two laughs that echoed down the hall,

Two voices answering every call.

We shared a face, a crooked grin,

The same wild storm beneath our skin,

A secret language, soft and fast—

A promise that our bond would last.

But promises can’t fight a ghost,

And drugs can steal the ones we love the most.

One phone call split the sky in two—

Now half the world is missing you.

They said “overdose” like just a word,

Like thunder distant, barely heard.

But I felt lightning crack my chest,

And grief moved in and built a nest.

Because you weren’t just family, you were me,

My mirror, my symmetry.

The one who knew my silent pain,

The one who danced inside my brain.

Now mornings come and feel half-made,

Like someone stole the sun and shade.

I stare at mirrors, lost and thin—

Not sure which half of me is mine within.

Who am I without your voice?

Without our jokes, our reckless choice?

Without your hand to guide my way

When life got hard and skies went gray?

My life’s a room with pieces thrown,

A house that doesn’t feel like home.

Bills and worries crowd the floor,

Dreams we once had—shut in a drawer.

I need to fix it, build it right,

But grief has stolen all my sight.

The map we drew is torn apart…

You took the compass from my heart.

Some nights I whisper to the air,

As if your spirit’s lingering there.

“Tell me, sis, where do I start?

How do I live with half a heart?”

And in the quiet, soft but clear,

I swear your laughter still appears.

Not loud, not bright, not like before—

But just enough to crack the door.

Maybe I’m not meant to be

The girl I was when you were with me.

Maybe this broken, shaking start

Is how I build a braver heart.

Maybe the road is mine to see,

Not half of you—but all of me.

And though the ache will never end,

Your love is stitched beneath my skin.

So I’ll pick up one small piece today,

Just one lost shard along the way.

A step, a breath, a fragile start—

With you still living in my heart.

Because twins like us don’t break apart,

Even death can’t split that art.

You’re gone from sight, but not from me…

I’m still your half.

You’re still my symmetry. 

​

Half of a Whole

I used to walk this world in twos,

Two shadows stretching in our shoes,

Two laughs that echoed down the hall,

Two voices answering every call.

We shared a face, a crooked grin,

The same wild storm beneath our skin,

A secret language, soft and fast—

A promise that our bond would last.

But promises can’t fight a ghost,

And drugs can steal the ones we love the most.

One phone call split the sky in two—

Now half the world is missing you.

They said “overdose” like just a word,

Like thunder distant, barely heard.

But I felt lightning crack my chest,

And grief moved in and built a nest.

Because you weren’t just family, you were me,

My mirror, my symmetry.

The one who knew my silent pain,

The one who danced inside my brain.

Now mornings come and feel half-made,

Like someone stole the sun and shade.

I stare at mirrors, lost and thin—

Not sure which half of me is mine within.

Who am I without your voice?

Without our jokes, our reckless choice?

Without your hand to guide my way

When life got hard and skies went gray?

My life’s a room with pieces thrown,

A house that doesn’t feel like home.

Bills and worries crowd the floor,

Dreams we once had—shut in a drawer.

I need to fix it, build it right,

But grief has stolen all my sight.

The map we drew is torn apart…

You took the compass from my heart.

Some nights I whisper to the air,

As if your spirit’s lingering there.

“Tell me, sis, where do I start?

How do I live with half a heart?”

And in the quiet, soft but clear,

I swear your laughter still appears.

Not loud, not bright, not like before—

But just enough to crack the door.

Maybe I’m not meant to be

The girl I was when you were with me.

Maybe this broken, shaking start

Is how I build a braver heart.

Maybe the road is mine to see,

Not half of you—but all of me.

And though the ache will never end,

Your love is stitched beneath my skin.

So I’ll pick up one small piece today,

Just one lost shard along the way.

A step, a breath, a fragile start—

With you still living in my heart.

Because twins like us don’t break apart,

Even death can’t split that art.

You’re gone from sight, but not from me…

I’m still your half.

You’re still my symmetry. 

It's been 8 years since my identical twin sister died from a fentanyl overdose. I feel like I'm losing my mind. I can't think straight. It's like all my common sense is gone. My memory is so bad now and my hair is falling out. I can't keep weight on me. I'm just continuing to drown in my pain. Do I go to a mental hospital for this?