multiple psilocybin treatments to find relief from anxiety and depression?
Has anyone needed multiple psilocybin treatments to find relief from anxiety and depression? I’ve read all these studies and research that say a single dose of psilocybin can lead to rapid and sustained reductions in depression and anxiety. But that wasn’t necessarily the case for me… story below
Story:
I’m diagnosed with Chronic PTSD, OCD, anxiety and depression. With the help of my therapist, I did a Psilocybin assisted therapy session 3 weeks ago. For the most part, The journey itself was beautiful and profound - I had so much clarity, and for the first time understood the exact root of my problems. My thoughts were so clear and I was in tune with my feelings and emotions. I felt love, inner-peace and gratitude - for the first time in my life.
There was also some really dark parts - I saw traumatic memories from my childhood that I had repressed and didn’t know happened. So, at 38, for the the first time in my life, I saw a very traumatic experience I endured as a child. Again, prior to the journey, I had no idea this even happened (I don’t remember the majority of my childhood). As difficult as this was, I do feel it is important in my healing journey as a lot of things make more sense now. However, For the week after the session, I was pretty messed up about what I saw. I wouldn’t say it re-traumatized me, as that’s a little extreme, but it definitely messed me up mentally and emotionally. Week 2 was a little better, but I still felt pretty unstable at times.
It’s been 3 weeks now, and I’ve started to settle back in and come to peace with things. I’m doing all the integration work with my therapist, but my anxiety and depression doesn’t seem to be any better than it was before the journey. In fact, at times, it feels worse. I understand this is probably normal when old trauma surfaces, but I’m wondering if some people needed multiple sessions to find relief from their anxiety and depression?
Or maybe I had unrealistic expectations? Admittedly, I think I went into it thinking I’d be far less depressed and anxious afterwards, but that’s not the case. I did receive a ton of valuable information - It’s almost like the medicine said “here’s why you struggle with trauma, depression anxiety, etc. and here’s how it feels to live on the other side - free. Now go do the work” but the medicine itself didn’t relieve the symptoms, if that makes sense.